THE FALL OF A GUARDIAN

YNNAH

~2 years ago~

I sighed a few times as I stood at a huge door in front of me as my mind debated whether to open it or not. I could hear the music and laughter of those people behind this door, I composed my self and took another deep breath while holding the door knob and turned it but I still don't have the confidence to open it, I clenched my fist and bravely touched the doorknob once again.

I know I'm not welcome inside because from the first place I am not indeed welcome for them. They loathed me to the point that they would push me away from their son, but I am still here making myself stupid and hoping they would accept me as their son's girlfriend. I didn't do something to them for despising me this much, but they are overdoing it.

They even did stories that I was exchanged by my boyfriend for someone who truly deserves him. To the woman who's more beautiful, sexy, and wealthy. I pushed the door harshly to get their attention, but something caught my attention more. No, not something but someone.

His parents are not around, only his friends and cousins but I never thought of that. I just focused on my boyfriend with a girl beside him while they were both kissing torridly which made me stilled in disbelief.

One of his friends tried to make them stop, and he succeeded while pointing my direction. I saw how he look stunned when his eyes wide open. I could hear nothing but my heart beats so fast as if horses were running inside it. Everybody's eyes were on mine but I still don't give a damn. He pushed the girl away as he walked towards me but I stopped him using my hand.

It hurts, yes it pains me so damn much! But I don't want them to see that I'm vulnerable and affected by what just happened a while ago. I composed myself once again and gaze at him without any expression that can catch a glimpse of my face.

"Y-ynnah-"

"Stop," I said to cut him off. I don't need any explanation from him because what I saw was all enough to realize everything.

I am not a masochist just to ignore the fraud he committed and my mind was closed for his stupid explanations!

"Ynnah please-,"

"I said stop! Are you deaf or just stupid?" I couldn't stop myself from shouting.

"Hey, miss! What's your problem with my boyfriend? Who are you to yell at him? " the woman he kissed earlier entered.

I sophisticatedly raised my brow and eyed her from head to foot. "Boyfriend huh?" I said as I glared at Xander who was now bent over. "Then it's all yours. Anyway, I'm Ynnah Francine Seung his long-time girlfriend but now his ex. "

I saw how he looked up at me with wide eyes. "Y-ynnah-,"

"Let's break up. " I finally said before he finishes anything he was about to say as I turned my back to walk away. He was about to run after me but the girl stops him from doing so.

"What the heck is she talking about?!" I heard the woman exclaimed it before I could get out of the door.

The moment that I finally came out of that room, the tears that I had been holding back came out.

So, all this time he's cheating on me? How dare him?! Did he think I would chase? Fuck him! In his stupid dreams!

I am foolish but I will never chase!

I left that place with a heavy heart while tears start again to stream from my eyes and at the same time, it rained heavily. I don't care where my feet take me as long as I want to get away from that place. My vision is dimming because of the tears that blocking my sight, and the rain that pouring mercilessly. I look up at the clear dark sky with its raindrops pouring at my face.

Isn't it's odd? Crying under the rain with a heavy heart? Just like in K-dramas. But K-dramas ended up with a happy ending while my story ends in such a stupid way.

My feet brought me to the park, it was a children's park. There were few people here enjoying the coldness of the raindrops pouring continuously. Some of them were children playing hide and seek while some were chasing each other. My tears dripped even more that you wouldn't notice because of the rain. I miss my childhood days, the ones you have nothing to worry about but studying, homework, and playing games until you get bored. No pains, no grief just happiness.

I noticed that I could no longer feel the raindrop on my body even though it was still raining. I look up and realize that there was an umbrella above me. I turned to the person who owned it and I saw a man with its all-black outfit. I stared at his coal-black lackluster eyes which were he did the same. It's like a black diamond screaming a different kind of beauty despite its dullness.

But I have this weird feeling that those eyes weren't as what it seems to be. It was like a maze that you will lose if you'll stare that much into his gems. But before I lost in his stares I look away and tried to compose myself and let out a deep breath.

"What are you doing? And who are you? " I asked as I recovered from our stares. I also feel a little dizzy and cold.

"It's raining, you shouldn't be here," he said without answering my questions.

I composed myself once again as I give him a why-do-you-care look that he doesn't also get. I wanted to be alone and I hate somebody's presence this time. But I don't want to be rude cause I know he just wanted to help.

"You know what? You don't have to do this. I can manage myself besides I'm on my way home. " I said.

"You look pale, your eyes were tired. You're not okay and you can't go home by yourself. You look sick and anytime by now, you'll collapse. "

Is he kidding me? I am just broken.

"You're kidding, right? I'm just broken not sick." I said as I turned my back and was about to walk away but my vision became blurred of a sudden as I felt my knees wobbled. The last thing I knew was my sight became blurry and my knees haven't supported the body.

Then total darkness.

•

Trust and faith.

If you truly love a person then you must have these. Trusting and having faith in the one you love.

Just believe in him- believe...

I sigh as I smiled bitterly to myself.

Believe?

Trust?

Faith?

How pathetic those words can make someone, a fool. Loving is trusting, right? Loving is having faith, right? Loving is believing in one, right?

Right?

Two years since we broke up. Two years had passed.

Two years.

Beautiful memories weren't they? Memories. Since we're in high school. Since the day he helped me. Since the day he kissed, hugged, and told sweet words.

Memories.

Memories that I wanted to fade. Memories that I wanna forget. A particular person.

I want to forget.

Why did he do that to me? Why?

I trusted, believed, and loved.

Yeah, I just loved him with all my heart but, why?

2 years ago, we broke up and I found myself in a dark place. It was as if nothing was good, and nothing will ever be. It was so dark I thought I lost myself in a battle within me. I felt so helpless and hopeless that I withdrew from everything.

My heart was broken, and maybe, that time, it was.

But it wasn't just broken because of a failed relationship, and if that was the case, it wasn't all of it.

I came to a point when hugs, chocolates, and ice cream weren't enough. Crying, crying was the only way I can breathe.

And then one day, the darkness just lifted.

I realized that no matter how crazy life gets, there are things that can help you through. Faith, Trust, and Love.