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Ex-Wife, Please Have Some Self-Respect

Chapter 5 No.5

Word Count: 1024    |    Released on: 19/01/2026

phone from the carpet

ed. Tran

d her skull like a rubb

because she loved him-she told herself-but because this was a PR nightmare waiting

he hadn't eaten since lunch. The tequila shot was churnin

n. She needed food. Just a

the massive Sub-

stocked. Rows of organic vegetables, e

hing wa

of pasta salad. A pre-made smoothie. Jorden preppe

st ingredients

k of cheddar cheese.

ere the knives? She opened a drawer.

of a chef's knife. It felt alien in her hand, heavy and unbalanced. She had never actually used this thing. She

ough she wasn't sure if she

ent child. And she hated Jorden for making her feel this wa

f milk. She would just

e date. It exp

y in the fridge. He rotated the s

paying attention for day

n into the trash wi

s trembled as she ordered a pizza. A greasy, carb-loaded pizza

sly. I hope it gives me

ed, she paced

own at New Yor

eating li

alive. Every movement sent a spike of white-hot pain through his chest, but he categorized the sensation, acknowledged the nerve signals, and compartmental

ked in, looki

. remarkable. Your blood pressure has normalized. Your cortisol levels ar

The body follows the mind, Doc

accid

ge," Jorden

atever you're doing, keep doing it. We might be able

have wo

You nee

at his phone. He had asked Nurse Joy to help him order a replacement on

ck the social media fallout. The algorithm, cr

our ago. Chloe's

tticus. Singin

Soulmates. Evans

e video. He watch

e would have been analyzing every pixel,

den saw som

when Atticus got too close. The tension in her jaw. The w

appy. She wa

he narcissistic preening. The way he positioned h

asite. Catarina Evans is a host b

l sorry for her. It ma

the screen. He

typed a

atch. Bes

ure on a death certificate. A public acknowledgment t

urned off

te a slice standing up over the sink, grease drippin

hone

tion from

Chloe Vance's post: Per

of pepperoni fell from

as a

as o

... wishin

he whispered. Her

sitting in a hospital bed, probably perfectl

hissed. "I'll giv

rust into the disposa

d she wasn't going to hold his ha

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Ex-Wife, Please Have Some Self-Respect
Ex-Wife, Please Have Some Self-Respect
“I was driving through a rainstorm in upstate New York, pushing my old Volvo to the limit just to pick up a Dior gown for my wife, Catarina. She needed it for a gala tonight, where she planned to spend the evening standing next to the man she actually loved, Atticus Deleon. The truck hit me head-on, crossing the center line and sending my car rolling down an embankment in a shriek of twisted metal and shattered glass. As the steering column crushed my chest, my brain didn't see a white light; it was pried open by a digital tsunami, flooding my mind with the "Quantum Archive"-billions of data points on surgery, high-frequency trading, and combat. I woke up in the ICU with three broken ribs and a concussion, but the only thing waiting for me was a screaming voicemail from my wife's assistant. "Jorden, where the hell are you? Catarina has been waiting for thirty minutes! You are so incompetent it's actually impressive." There was no "Are you okay?" or "Are you alive?"-only fury over a ruined dress and a missing tie. While I was being resuscitated, my wife was on Instagram, singing "Endless Love" with Atticus and laughing at my "tantrum." She even called the family lawyer to freeze my credit cards, wanting to make sure I couldn't even buy a coffee without her permission. For three years, I had been the "useful husband," the doormat who apologized whenever she stepped on my toes. But the accident had overwritten my desperation with cold, hard logic, and I realized I had almost died for a woman who viewed me as a liability with a negative return on investment. When Catarina finally stormed into my hospital room to demand an apology for ruining her night, I didn't look at her with the usual puppy-dog eyes. I looked at her with ice in my veins and handed her a manila envelope I had drafted myself. "Sign the divorce papers, Ms. Evans. I'm done being your canary."”