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Born in Exile

Chapter 6 No.6

Word Count: 5886    |    Released on: 06/12/2017

new bricks and stucco heated by the summer sun; an obscure passage led him into a street partly of dwelling-houses, partly

racteristics of furnished lodgings must have surmised that Peak dwelt here among his own moveables, and was indebted to the occupier of the premises for bare walls alone; the tables and chairs, though plain enough, were such as civilisation permits; and though there were no pictures, sundry ornaments here and there made strong denial of lodging-house affinity. It w

e cloth was spotless, the utensils tasteful and carefully disposed. In a bowl lay an appetising salad, ready for mingling; a fragment of Camembert cheese was relieved upon a setting of green leafage; a bo

ten intemperate of speech) he spoke least temperately. For six years he had shifted from quarter to quarter, from house to house, driven away each time by the hateful contact of vulgarity in every form,-by foulness and dishonesty, by lying, slandering, quarrelling, by drunkenness, by brutal vice,-by all abominations that distinguish the lodg

ist led his customer to an upper room, in which were stored sundry curiosities, and happened casually to say that he was desirous of finding a lodger for two superfluous chambers. Peak's inquiries led to his seeing Mrs. Button, whom he found to be a Frenchwoman of very pleasing appearance; she spoke fluent French-English, anything but disagreeable to an ear constantly tormented by the London vernacular. After short reflection he decid

hter (aged thirty-two) of a man who was drinking himself to death on such money as he could earn by casual reporting for a Twybridge newspaper. Mrs. Peak the elder now abode with her sister at the millinery shop, and saw little of her two married children. With Oliver and Charlotte their brother had no sympathy, and affected none; he never wrote to them, nor they to him; but years had strengthened his regard for his mother, and with her he had fairly regular correspondence. Gladly he would have seen her more often, but the

iled in his Kingsmill venture, returned to London. Encounter with the fatal Andrew had been spared him ever

fashion; he had seen a good deal of the British Isles and had visited Paris. The result

d nothing, and

imagined that it only depended upon himself to find admission before long to congenial society-by which he then understood the companionship of intelligent and aspiring young men. Christian, however, had himself no such circle, and knew that the awkward lad from Twybridge could not associate wi

e doors open to him? There were his equals; not in the mean streets where he dwelt. There were the men of cultur

f fascination; his memory never lost the impress of these ladies' faces. Nothing very noteworthy about them; but to Godwin they conveyed a passionate perception of all that is implied in social superiority. Here he stood, one of the multitude, of the herd; shoulder to shoulder with boors and pick-pockets; and within reach of his hand reposed those two ladies, in Olympia

erely his equals. With such as they h

who envied their immeasurable remoteness. Of mere wealth he thought not; might he only be recognised by t

rom the meeting of emancipated workmen he went away with scorn and detestation in his heart; but in the quiet of his lodgings he could sit down to aid their propaganda. One explanation of this inconsistency lay in the fact that no other channel was open to his literary impulses. Pure science could not serve him, for he had no original results to announ

ceticism exceedingly rare in young and lonely men. When Christian Moxey returned to London and took the house at Notting Hill, which he henceforth occupied together with his sister, a possibility of social intercourse at length appeared. Indeed it was a substantial gain to sit from time to time at a civilised table, and to converse amid graceful surroundings with people who at all events followed the intellectual cur

e find among his friends any man or woman for whose acquaintance he greatly cared. The Moxeys had a very small circle, consisting chiefly of intellectual inferiors. Christian was too in

dismiss the thought of Andrew Peak's eating-house, and to accept the friendly tact with which the journalist avoided all hint of unpleasant memories. That Earwaker should refrain from a single question concerning that abrupt disappearance, nearly ten years ago, sufficiently declared

e of these were written. As soon as he sat down to deliberate composition, a sense of his deficiencies embarrassed him. Godwin's self-confidence had nothing in common with the conceit which rests on imaginary strength. Power there was in him; of that he

nce with the dogmas of Oriental religion. This work was in his mind when he spoke so vehemently at Moxey's; already he had trembled with an impulse to write something on the subject, and during his journey home a possible essay had begun to shape itself. Late as was the hour

e had made a beginning of his critical essay, and the exordium so far satisfied him that he was tempted

ith examining certain tropical products which the traveller had recently cast pell-mell into his friend's s

rved Earwaker, and

ith hoarse so

imself. Read this cha

escort two poor girls Rouen. Not even time look in apologise. Go via Dieppe and leave Victoria few minutes. Hope be back Thursday. Express sincerest regret Mr. Peak.

mind as that? Ten to one this is some Quixotic obligation he has

represent a certain stage of drunkenness. I

ntoxicated, save wi

g with good-natured mirth, then

t will delight you,' said Earwaker, ta

ng that all men are not, and individual in somewhat beside his proper name. Thus, while it exceeds not the bound of reason and

ghed his

writing for this Sunday rag, when you have just as little sympathy w

mmend?' asked the other, w

ou journali

it that the multitude are fools is not the sam

ieve yourself a de

the democratic spirit is st

minute, then su

what

ch depends on my succ

ughed t

on of social classes. Social, mark. The division I instinctively support is by no means intellectual. The well-b

personal to the speaker, but he feared to do so. His sil

ary social standing, independently of the individual's qualities. There's nothing of the flunkey in this, or I greatly deceive myself. Birth in a sphere of refinement is desirable and respectable; it saves one, absolutely, from many forms of coarseness. The mas

that to the cla

couldn't describe what exaltation all at once possessed me in the thought that a ploughman had so glorified a servant-girl that together they

rwaker for a moment had no re

he journalist decided at lengt

he face. If I yielded to my natural impulse, I should cry out, "Strike me! spit at me! show you hate me!-anything but that terrible humiliation of yourself before me!" That's how I feel. The abaseme

egarded hi

e fineness o

moral w

pel of the pessimist. Let

e last evenings seemed to have raised his spirits and spurred the acti

could live a good deal with them. But the London vulgar I abominate, root and branch. The mere sound of their voices nauseates me; their vilely grotesque accent and pronunciation-bah! I could write a paper to show that t

s avowal, and wondered whether

d. 'I certainly believe that, socially and politically, there is less

excitedly. 'I don't mean only the slum-denizens. All, all Hammersmith as

ould benefit you more than

yed a lit

doing someth

time his hands trembled with nervous agitation, and occ

pined Earwaker. 'I suppose

nce? Can a perfectly unk

r. Seeing Peak had laid down his pipe

misfortune that I can't talk earnestly

m in comparison

the other, going back to his subjec

y, I be

k m

I were a

waker's, and they b

n of me? Of course I resisted tooth and nail, but it seems to me now that I was rather foolish i

-m

simple. I would have nothing to do with these reconciliations. I would stand firm as

ares

There's a vast police force in them, at all events. A

his argument led

y can still take that standin

onvinced that it is un

shut their eyes

merely lower a nictitating membrane which permits th

into your paper,' said the jo

was not so critical. Christian Moxey had come up as a topic, and Earwake

ry. I can't see that I am bound to secrecy-at all events with you. Poor M

yea

letter of some sort or other revived them, and he hastened back to town. He might as well have stayed away; the girl very soon married another man. Less than a year later she had bitterly repented this, and in some way or other she allowed Moxey to

? I begin to und

eak. I have an affection for him, a

Earwaker, and

espise

ole, I'm a

mpatience. 'It would be just as reasonable to

oubt

hey are all still so en masse. The defect of the female mind? It is my belief that this is nothing more nor less than the defect of the uneducated human mind. I believe most men

lly. Four or five years ago I had really made up my mind to marry; I wasted much valuable time among women and girls, of anything but low social standing. But my passions were choked by my logical faculty. I foresaw a terribl

its ramifications, elaborated the inconsistencies

ind them intolerable when their expression took a vulgar form. Between

minds I have

aid Peak, after hesitating. 'Have you ever as

ker l

phrase means. It sounds

ss of commoners. With peeresses

precedence makes all th

family is a finer being than any girl

mads produce a Rachel o

king of genius,

d call well-born women. They are delightful creatures, some of them, in given circumsta

ssed annoyance, a

an can forget or forgive. On that account they are the obstructive element in social history. If I loved a woman of rank above my own she would ma

but for a moment only. Peak's countenance clouded

ose character wou

e is a case in which a woman will marry without much regard to her husba

made no answer, and fell

nalist, when he too had mused awhile. '

on

cion was

f regarding these things. But it's the natural tendency of my mind. If I

gave you a brain inferior to that of few men.

I can't thank you for it, be

cited Peak, and after a m

us as you like; my one supreme desire is to marry a perfectly refined woman.

defiantly. He quivered as he

ess,' returned his fri

because I know that, that I have made up my mind to travel for a year or two; it'll help me on

you could find satisfaction in the life to

asked Peak,

with house in town and country, with friend

good and throw asid

of your wife's crass conventio

if it were merely a form, I could train her to my own opinions. Society is growing liberal-the best

ook for her in soci

ived among people of breeding and high education, and neve

ume from a shelf. Quickly finding the

roclaim-I know you both, Have recognised your pl

e poem, and then looked

ideal akin to Murger's and Musse

much, and of the two I prefer Browning's. For my own part, I am a polygamist; my wives live in literatu

bout the room for a mi

for my paper. I shall cal

eplied the other, smiling. 'Will

dertook has been finished yet-nothing won that I e

summons to Staple Inn, with promise of Ma

ical? I haven't signed it, as my unmeaning name would perhaps indispose the fellow to see much good in it. I should thank you if you would write in your own person, saying that you act for a friend; you are probably well known in those quarters. If it is accepted, time enough to claim my glory. If it seems to you to have no chance, keep it till I return, as I hate the humiliation of refusals.-Don't think I made an ass of

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