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till warm when Ch
fingers searching the mattress for hi
g was uneven, and her body felt strangely heavy. She had imagined this night differently.
marriage. Surely, by now, she d
s. Four. Five. She waited for him to turn. To say her name. To touch her h
move,"
u all righ
ha
ecked his watch like a man leaving a
left h
t?" She knew. She n
rousers. "I want a son, Tor
ke I'm a field
r. He didn't ev
s convincing herself that things would eventually become easier between them. That perhaps Chr
e wondered whether he had ev
s loud, and she had done that in the bathroom with the
t a di
ed. Then he laughed. It was low and a
melled his cologne and her own perfume on his skin. "Remember the girl wh
rl was a
her ear. The gentleness was the cruellest thing h
as shaking, so she gripped harder.
ace. She couldn't name it and didn't trust it. Then
suitcase," he said, "and a father
e always saw, and he al
ts with her father, the years of feeling unwanted, and how desperately she
he had chosen
ng bookshop. The lease, the stock, the renovati
ned to ice. "
that way. No one shouts. It just stops arriving, and by Chr
ity," Toria whisper
understood how cruel his words were. Anything that might convince her
was no
, one hand on the fra
ic
losing seemed louder th
taring at the empty space he ha
on her cheek, crying when the loan came through. You're a
l. Or a
endlessly about expanding the shop, introducing new collections and
happiness fel
ow and finally let it break, silen
as if nothing
st was cut into triangles. Chriss sat behind his newspaper, ankl
in its proper place. The silverware was polished, the curtains w
ia felt
ght look different. Ti
rfect. His han
rning,"
" He didn
that had taken her apart, and
and indecent, in its little glass dish. Her phone buzzed agains
g ring caught the light, and she twisted it,
e table, waiting for him to finish breakfast so the
she mistaken his pr
n nothing,"
up. His eyes hadn
not h
esterday. Or t
t him. He tu
r across a room. Yet he had been counting her meals,
Toria hated herself for the w
s there were things about her that he paid
ly pushed the
ing for affection in th
"I won't be
ered an inch. "Wh
ut
or
d watched the screen go black, and a small, wicked thrill ran t
iting for him to decide
g for permission
oor opened
His voice was perfectly c
rn around. "A
dn't
part that f
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