The Awkward Age

ry, with his back turned, was gazing out of the window, and when in answer he showed his face there were tears in his eyes. His answer in fact wa

in every bodily mark and sign, in every look of the eyes above all-oh to a degree!-in the sound, in the charm of the voice." He spoke low and confidentially, but with an intensity that now relieved him-he was as restless as with a discovery. He moved about as with a sacred awe-he mi

st touching tributes I've ever seen rendered to a woman. In fact, however, how could I know? I never saw Lady Julia, and you had in advance all the evidence I could have: the portrait-pretty bad, in the taste of the time, I admit-and the three or four photographs you must ha

ery true-you're quite right. It's far beyond any identity in the pictures.

to you, please remember, nothing that qualified a jot my sense of the special stamp of her face. I've always positively foun

r. Longdon returned with spirit.

ouched and amused. "Let us say at

on his arm. "That's exactly what I o

little too high,

the particular disposition round it of the fair hair, makes

de-ringlets of 1830. It should have the rest of the personal arrangement, the pelisse, the shape of bonnet, the sprigged muslin dress and the

as might have been said, to live with it, looked hard

om haven't I observed? Do you like her?"

again. "How can I tell-

ent," Vanderbank suggested

t to make of them. They don't go with the rest of h

"She must have been. And Nanda-yes, c

was gay!" he added with an eage

derbank continued with his exemplary candour, "we mustn

d him. "Do you t

onferring as the party "out" in some game with the couple in the other room. "Yes. Sad.

down, so that they were presently together, placed a little sideways and face to face. She had shown perhaps that she supposed him to have wished to take her hand, but he forbore to touch her, though letting her feel all the kindness of his eyes and their long backward vision. These things she evidently felt soon enough; she went on before he had spoken. "I know how well you knew my

way. I thank her very much. I called, after having had the honour of dining-I called, I think, three time

thinks she's more at home than almost any one. She does it on purpose: she knows what it i

aid Mr. Longdon. "And then I

and after an instant to think well of it. "I d

nked. "In the drawing-

o hear all the talk. Mr. Mitchett says I ought to-that it helps to form the young mind. I hoped, for that reason," s

he brought me home here that night, when, as knowing you so differently, we took the liberty of talking you all over. It naturally had the effect of making me want to begin with you afresh

hen she caught herself up. "

occasion's brilliant and the affluence grea

ck him as literal. "You're not used to such talk. Neither am I. It's rather wonderful, isn't

struck a spectator as infernally subtle, took an in

t like him," Nanda explained. "But

d another pause.

ted! "I know he does. He has told

ven you," Mr.

's a bit dreadful," she pursued. Still, there

r indeed hung fire. "How

n before he could really say:

m so, but he quickly went on: "I think one has a little natural nervousness at being

h her curious hard interest. "I underst

for accidents, for disappointments and recoveries: you can tak

to make no m

m too eas

orth. But even on this she spared him too; a look appeared to have been enough for her. "How can you say, of course, already?-if you can't say for Mr. Van. I mean as you've seen him so much. When he asked me just now if I liked YOU I tol

ell now. "There are immen

to put to him kept up his surprise. "Have reasons anything to do with it? I

ly reassured, showed something finer still in the e

elebrated for it, and it's a kind of trick-isn't it?-that's catching. But don't you think it's the most interesting sort of talk? Mother says we

y finding out. And I've got, thank heaven,"

them," Nanda replied in a tone evide

yourself. Your resemblance to your grandmoth

old me things, but that I should have something straight from you is exactly what she also wants. My grandmother mu

o," Mr. Longdon returned, "is the miracle of the physical heredit

ll her honesty. "They're n

ou're separated from her by a gulf-and not only of ti

course. And you breathe the same-the s

h as possible. Some day I'll tell you more of w

set you so?" Nan

ne of the

"more, perhaps, than you think. In fact," she said earnestly, "I PROMISE to understand. I've some imagination. Had my grandmother?" she asked. H

did your m

-dear mamma?

ush. "Your mother then has a

h a deeper attention. "You don

t could to diffuse coolness. "I don't care a single scrap, my dear, i

for her da

Mr. Longdon had not spoken loud

first time into the semblance of a smile. "You f

qu

hat's sp

like it," he a

t I'm sure you know what I mean. You mustn't think," she ea

tly, but very effectively, shook his h

nstant, and it made her completely

re may be of

really reflected in his quick brown eyes that she alternately drew him on and warned him off, but also that what they were beginning more and more to make out was an emotion of her own trembling there beneath her tension. His glimpse of it widened-his glimpse of it fairly triumphed when suddenly, after this last declaration, sh

urmured. But he laid his hand on her

you'll see!" She broke short off with a quaver and the next instant she turned-there was some one at the door. Vanderbank, still not quite at his ease, had com

RTH. MR.

easy precaution, a conscious corrective to the danger of audacity. It wouldn't have been impossible to divine that if Harold shut his eyes and jumped it was mainly for the appearance of doing so. Experience was to be taken as showing that one might get a five-pound note as one got a light for a cigarette; but one had to check the friendly impulse to ask for it in the same way. Mr. Cashmore had in fact looked surprised, yet not on the whole so surprised as the young man seemed to have expected of him. There was almost a quiet grace in the combination of promptitude and diffidence with which Harold took over the respo

g upper lip; he was large and jaunty, with little petulant movements and intense ejaculations that were not in the

Pensively, a minute, he appeared to figure the words, in their absurdity, on the

at you ought to tell your

I've borro

y having listened to you. Tell him, certainly," he went on after an instant. "But

im like a man, and that's just what puts him so awfully out. He denies to my face that I AM one. One would suppose, to hear him

-you youngsters-as many wants, I know,

ought to speak of it," he continued, "do it rather to mamma." He not

h. "It's your mother herself who giv

. "She HAS come in, I know. S

had not done with him. "I suppose you mean that if it's only

led. "Do you think that after you've let me have it you can tell? You could, of course, if you hadn't." H

an really, its anno

but at the same time his evolutions were quick. "I dare say I AM selfish, but what I was thinking was that the terrific wigging, don't you know?-well, I'd take it f

lared his amusement. "So s

that may lead to something-indirectly, don't you see? for she won't TELL my father, she'll only, in her own wa

icence. The thread of their relations somehow lost itself in the subtler twist, and he fell back on mere stature, position and property, things a

new element in their tal

, quite to satisfy him; but the question was caught on the wing by Mrs. Brookenham herself

of a few minutes Mr. Cashmore, on the sofa face to face with her, found his consciousness quite purged of its actual sense of his weakness and a new turn given to the idea of what, in one's very drawing-room, might go on behind one's back

eant. "Her extravagance is beyond everything, and though there are bills enough, God knows, that

she was incapable of reproach, though there were of course shades in her resignation, and her daughter's report of her to Mr. Longdon as conscious of an absence of prejudice would have been justified for a spectator b

hat impression from Harold. "What has that to do with it? Does a ri

ement. There was little indeed to be amused at here except his choice of

nk I've come here to let you say to me such dreadful things as that." He was an odd compound, Mr. Cashmore, and the air of personal good health, the untarnished bloom which sometimes lent a monstrous serenity to his mention of the barely me

hings, of the wretched miseries in which you all knot yourselves up, which you yourselves are as li

platform use of things that might serve; but the next moment he was grave again, as if his observation had reminded him

o enter into her life, but you can't get in

give me lots of things. Do you mean she'

want, like all other laws, once I know what they ARE, to accept-she has her precious freshness of feeling which I say to myself that, so far as control is concerned, I ought to respect. I t

by this picture. "That's

t, for Mrs. Brook, seemed fairly to o

ient mother!" Mr

" Mrs. Brook sighed, "ready. Nanda has stepped on the stage and I give her up the house. Besides," she went on musingly, "it's awfully interesting. It IS the modern daughter-we're really 'doing' her, the child and I; and as the modern has always been my own note-I've

firmer ground. "Do you mean

thing KNEW, don't you see? what we must keep back. She wants us not to have to think. It's quite maternal!"

e I might find her with you, and I may tell you frankly that I get more from her than I do from

. "No-you're right; she doesn't, as I do,

a laugh: "after all you DO believe me! You recognise how benigh

Fanny's NOT 'bad'; she's magnificently good-in the sense of being generous and simple and true

gth that comes from the practice of public debate. "

nerous and simple. I'm exaggeratedly anxious about Nanda. I care, in spite of myself, for what people may say. Your wife doesn't-s

heavily followed.

-that she's a great glorious pagan. It's a real relief to know such a type-it's like a flash of insight into history. None the less if you ask me why then it isn't all right for young things to 'shriek' as I say, I have my answer perfectly ready." Aft

ned it to be!" Mr. Cashmor

're all watching her. It's like some great natural

Cashmore laughed. "I

for a moment believe is that her bills are paid by any one. It's MUCH m

she can get o

ss such a woman. She shows things, don't you see? as some fine tourist region shows the pla

hen you talk about 'adducing'-!" He appeared to intimate-as with the hint that if she didn't

etration. "You try to believe what you CAN'T believe, in order to give yourself excuses. And she does

red. "Grander and sim

much grander. She wouldn't, in the case you conceiv

t was almost mystic. "I

depths, tracked it further and fu

as if too conscious o

e." She had a pause through which there glimmered a ray from luminous hours, the inner intimacy which, privileged as h

an he could himself achieve was in his face, but he tried

us naturally and easily, listen to our talk, feel our confidence in her, be kept up, don't you know? by the sense of what we expect of her splendi

hmore enquired, "wha

on the point of telling him. "I DON'T see h

bligat

l." Mrs. Brook was positive. "The comp

ulations are petty,"

His hostess lost herself in the view, which was at

tly what I'm

ion this time in her headshake, "that couldn't be. We MUST keep her up-that's your guarantee. It's rather too much,"

rri

that, going straight on, she treated it. "I shall never again give her

ed her there. "It wouldn't suit you, you contend? Well then, I hope it will eas

ur. "And since when, pray?" It was as if a fabric had crumbled. "She was

or her. "I don't say she wasn't

s Mrs. Brook's disappointment unless it had been h

done with a b

poison that courses through her veins." He jumped up at this as if he couldn't bear it, presenting as he walked across the room, however, a large fo

turned round. "With whom is it you talk us over? With Petherton and hi

duced you." She had a smile that attenuated a little her image, for there were things that on a second thought he appeared ready to take from her. She patted the sofa as if to invite him again to be seated, and thou

ure you there has really been nothing." With a continuation of

u mean

ou don't believe Mrs. Donner is dust and ashes to me,"

it to me that you're

ive weight to his reply. "Awfully

help me? Help me, I mean, to help yo

a, which he at last produced. "Why wouldn't it be

ts in which it could be considered. Mrs. Brook, on a quick survey, selected the ironic. "I see, I see. I might by the same law arrange somehow that Lady F

hat was almost a reproach to her mirth. "I

. "Is that perhaps because

hat he rose again with a start and the butler, coming in, received her enquiry full in the face. This fu

om the sofa calmly up at Mr. Cashmore-used the time, it might have seemed, for correcting

to see if he were hea

do go

Hicks the other

rrie wa

horrid bore. But I talke

ered Mr. Cashmore an expression that might

had no eyes

dn't te

-beholding him for the first time-receive it with a little of the stiffness of a person gre