Simon the Jester

arrival in London, when Dale Kynnersley rus

here you a

have such a vehement manner of pro

, give me some tea-and I think I'

you bre

ead his ingenuo

he girls are always doing the wrong things and I never do the right

you urchins," said I, "I ho

hair brushed back from his forehead over his head, an olive complexion, and a keen, open, clean-shaven face. He wore a dark-brown

s mouthful and

your sanity

ve passed over," I replied

e certain, and asked in his pronounless w

y wax the ends of my moustache. It got horribly limp in the air o

ly. "You are as white as you were before you went away. Why the blazes you d

e you can," sai

But first let me go th

he House of Commons." On the 4th my constituency claimed me for the opening of a bazaar at Wymington. A litt

iff Reform, about which I

out the country. And this brings me to my news. I was talking to Raggles the other day-he dropped a hint, and Raggles's h

nis

rson's

in spite of myself, at these pueri

hinks he ought to be the Chancellor of the Exchequer, or at least First Lord, instead o

at your conversational En

ontinued, loftily taking

l it? They seem to want you. You're miles away over t

owledgment o

I'm awfully proud of you already, but I should go

with his finger always on the pulse of the party machine, was the last man in the world to talk nonsense. I only had to "buck up." Yet by the time Sanderson sends in his resignation to the King of England, I shall have sent in mine to the King of Hosts. I moved slightly in my chair, and a twinge of th

t bored you to tears. I tho

tum," said I. "

" sai

s tr

r Faversham back fro

t," s

air from the table and swinging one leg across the

e you lo

hetically. "It is part of the religion of your generation to wear socks to

o they are! I dressed mys

wrong wi

arette impatient

bly be. Everything's rotten-but I've

y n

ss, which is ever so much more important th

le at the end of the room. He crossed and sat

rough the envelopes. H

d not come up to her expectations. The Mobray-Robertsons, with whom she travelled, quarrelled with their food. They had never even hear

ch a good thing for everybody, husband included. For, I repeat, Eleanor is a young woma

faint at the sight of ink. They will put themselves to all kinds of physical and pecuniary inconvenience in order to avoid regular employment. They are the tramps of the fashionable world. But in vain do they sing to Dale of the joys of silk-hatted and patent-leather-booted vagabondage and deride his habits of industry; Dale turns a deaf ear to them and urges on his strenuous career. Rogers, coming in to clear away the breakfast things, wa

inch, of the Un

and on his

my custom to breakfast at afternoon t

ewilderment I br

dull article for his s

or Law Admi

g to do anything these people ask me.

e cried, laying down his pen

ge," s

erjection, and added tha

five have been known to die of senile decay, and

r Faversham had better

er still in my ha

ay. I thought she was getting on your nerves. But you want pulling t

onception of sublunary affairs. It has shown me that motley is

d young England, "and tell me what

d them. But it was a grim jest. Most of the matters with which I had to deal appeared so trivial. Only he

y give a tenn

ve them a couple o

send five pounds apiece to the authors of various begging letters

, all of them,"

, at any rate," said I, "and the

tune, my sisters having each married rich men. I shall not need even Charon's obolus when I am dead, for we have ceased to believe in him-which is a pity, as the t

my actions too closely resemble those of a lunatic at large, trustees may be

ver, I informed my secretary that I woul

said he, "you might run round to E

particula

ebriate parrots or something. Gave

I, "on Lady Kynner

nt irony the passing show of humans-on foot, on omnibuses, in cabs and motors-turning them into shadow shapes tending no whither. I laughed to myself. They all fancied themselves so real. They all had schemes in their heads, as if they were going to live a thousand years. I walked westwards past the great clubs, moralising as I went, and feeling the reaction from the excitement of Murglebed-on-Sea. I looked up at one of my own clubs, a comfortable resting-place, and it struck me

u're the very man I

e human aspirations

and I are making plans already for the Easter recess. We are going to motor to Ath

. "Easter is l

at matter? Sa

, with a smile, "I have an engagem

ding was not to ta

the weddin

ak the en

d human pow

celet, from which d

" And she pointed to

t," I r

re you,

eman in a Gr

One has often extracted humour from the contemplation of the dissolution of others-that of the giant in "Jack the Giant-killer" for i

feeling of superiority in being in closer touch than they with eternal verities. I must take care that I do not play too much to the gallery, that I do not grow too conceited over the singularity of my situatio

crupulous care to their upbringing. She formed herself into a society for the protection of her own children, and managed them by means of a committee, which consisted of herself, and of which she was the honorary secretary. She drew up articles of association and regulations. If Dale contracted measles, she applied by-law 17. If Janet slapped Dorothy, by-law 32 was brought into play. When Dale clamoured for a rocking-horse, she found that the articles of association did not provide for imaginative equitation. As the children grew up, the committee had from time to time to revise the articles and submit them to the gene

some, distinguished woman, who can have, when she chooses, a most gracious manner. As I, worldling and jester though I am, for some mysterious reason have found favour in t

claimed my goodness in responding so soon to her call, bade me sit down on the sofa by her side, inquired

odies of her victims. With this man-eating tigress, declared Lady Kynnersley, was Dale infatuated. He scorched himself morning, noon, and night in her devastating presence. Had cut himself adrift from home, from society. Had left trailing about on his study table a jeweller's bill for a diamond bracelet. Was committing follies that made my brai

on the subject?" I asked, mindful

othing else," said Lady

ven, or pigs, or Babylonic cuneiform-anything but Lola

rider? These are contingencies in life for which one, with all the thought in the world, can make no provision. I had arranged, as

ped in a gold l

aking the chi

gement between them, I am

ng. And, instead of speaking, he will have nothing to do with her, and spends all his time-and, I su

-so red as she is

hat's where her artful and d

"declares her to be an a

back! Whoever hear

f a rather fiery

cus!" she

ircus is not essentially one of

" she said, with some impa

young idiot; but before taking action it's well to get a clear i

t Grosvenor House. I went, and saw them together. I shall never forget the look in the boy's eyes till my dying day. She has got him body and soul. One reads of such things in the poets, one sees it in pictures; but I've never come across it in real life-never, never. It's dreadful, horrible, revolt

essed my sympathy and my readiness to do anything in my power to snatch the infatuated boy from the claw and fang of the syren and hale him to the forgiving feet of Maisie Ellerton. Indeed, such a chivalrous adventure had vaguel

you about this creatu

hese things from their elders,

u knew

im sort

Sim

a solemn religious rite. They wouldn't think themselves respectable i

ries," sighed

likes, save bringing the lady here to tea. If you try to tear him away from her he'll only cling to her the closer.

ness. "But you will bring him back, Simon? I've arranged for hi

excellent, but w

, haven't I?" she sa

e," said

th I'm going to keep it I hav