"Lost Soul"

s stream from my eyes as the past events in my life unfold before me. I watch my life re

hing but sorrow, pain and endless melancholy. I gave everything into the universe, all the love, joy and hard work that I can do, I gave my life my all, but it failed me. I failed me. I was not designed to be amongst the living. I do not deserve to live anymore. The bubbly, ha

de into my skin. Even before it cuts through my veins I am already

kness, all I know is I lost what is left of me and there is no other

at I felt. I let myself give in to the pain. It resonated through my whole body and being, until we are one. My eyes are beginning to shut as 5 minutes passed. Briefly, I remembered how I came to the decision of ending my life. It is quite funn

at I would not want it to end as it is. I want

the other arm. The goal to cut vertically is to sever the radial artery in a manner that facilitates rapid blood loss. By cutting along the length of the artery, you'll trigge

you must go through the skin and tendons. After that, it seems to take a long, long period to bleed out. And true as it is, I am looking at my slit wrists and seems like forever as I see my blood drip to the

even at the doorstep of death, it still is a

You would experience an increased heart rate, a clammy feeling, dizziness, and become pale. This will be followed b

g is no longer an issue and people can no longer hurt you. This is my revenge for all the pain. Maybe, just maybe when they find me lying lifeless in a tub full of blood they will finally see what they all have done to me and how much I needed people to care. Perhaps, in my death they will feel and experience my life. Wi

me over and over again, now I am ending everything on my own terms. On this bathtub, I decided to die because once I tho

sfit, family wrecker. Our mother Lucy had an affair with another man - her boss.

ody ha

wish she aborted me instead or better yet she remained faithful to her beloved husband and kids. If only she made the right choices I would

a bit kindness. Matt was quite a big brother, he is an artist. He is wild and free and I envy him. He is the only one cool with me being part of their "family." While everybody el

How she crumbled and almost died because of heartbreak. She loved the son of a bitch. He was everything she wished for a man. Powerful, handsome and dangerous. Everything that her husband was not. The only reason she kep

Johnson Brewery and Winery is one of the biggest in our town. He was respected and everybody looked up to him. However, to me, he was a differ

rs more in a marriage that is already tainted with lies and mistrust. He saw me and e

something different with my family. While most families' youngest child is cuddled, loved and adored, I was treated with much disdain and neglect. The only person who took care of me is Nana Rose. She was my nanny who took care of me as a baby and until

tossled my hair but not on a loving way, she did it while my head went back and forth.

your father's daughter! You destroyed everything!!!" She shouted as she threw her wine glass at me, missing me by an inch and slamming at the wall. Nana Rose hurriedly run to me and took me and said "Hannah, baby, come with me, mommy is just sad..." But my mom shouted "Take her away Ro

my early age, she succumbed seeing how determined I was and how my family's relationship with me got worse. She w

cool to have you here. I don't really care who your father is." But with a lot of bothering and co

fatter but still fit in a way. That's how devastatingly handsome he was. He was still single based on his Social Media accounts and pres

countries, he was loaded that's for sure. Sometimes, I wonder if he would have ever wanted me and what would it be like to live with him. It must have been so exciting seeing how he jet sets around the world. That went on until I was 15. Up until

henever I can. Got VIP status on every clubs even

ant and need in a snap. And I did get everything I wanted. I reveled in the luxury of the life I have. I was quite the party girl. The 'it' girl if you may call it. I ravished every cent that I could get my hands on to go to clubs, get d

maybe? And die in a deep slumber. But no, until the end of my life I failed myself by choosing a gruesome death. As if my life is not enough suffering as it is, I chose to end it in the most painful way possible as if all this pain will atone to the sins of how I was brought into existence. Damn this brain and how damaged I am t

s on heroine. I feel floating, I was lighter and as the lights start to flicker out, I let out a sigh and a smile - remem

t breath and