The Tremendous Adventures of Major Gahagan

MORELLA: Sep

ur, with fourteen severe wounds and seven musket-balls in my body-it may be imagined that I have had little time to think about the publication of my memoirs. Inter arma silent le

he Queen's people, not in a military capacity, but as representative of an English journal; to which, for a trifling weekly remuneration, he was in the habit of transmitting accounts of the movements of the belligerents, and his own opinion of the politics of Spain. Receiving, for

uring the siege. The pesatero or landlord of the inn had been despatched by my brave chapel-churies, with his fine family of children-the officers quartered in the podesta had of course bolted; but one man remained, and my fellows were on the point of cutting him into ten thousand pieces with their borachios, when I arrived in th

ive up their intention of slaughtering him; but it is very little likely that his protestations would have

is five feet long) which is so well known among the Spanish armies-seeing, I say, this figure, the fellows retired, exclaiming, "Adios, corpo di bacco nosotros," and so on, clearly proving (by their words) that they would, if t

which he hoped would satisfy the cupidity of my troops. I said, though with much regret, that I must subject his person to a search; and hence arose the circumstance which has called for what I fear you will consider a somewhat tedious explanation. I found upon Mr. Sheeny's person three sovereigns in English money (which I have to this day), and singularly enough a copy of

y the men of both parties in Spain (indeed I served for some months on the Queen's side before I came over to Don Carlos); and, as it is my maxim never to give quarter, I never expect to receive it when taken myself. On issuing from the podesta with Sheeny's portmanteau and my sword in my hand,

y left whisker before I could say Jack Robinson. I looked round-there were seventy of the accursed malvados at the least, and within, as I said, a

mself. "GAHAGAN!" shouted out half-a-dozen scoundrelly voices, and fifty more shots came rattling after me. I was running- running as th

hout a lance; he had fired both his pistols at me, and was twenty yards in advance of his comrades; there was a similar distance between the two lancers who rode behind him. I determined then to wait for No. 1, and as he came up delivered cut 3 at his horse's near leg-off

the portmanteau at his head, with aim so true, that he fell back on his saddle like a sack, and thus when the horse galloped up to me, I had no difficulty in dismounting the rider: the whisky-bottle struck him over his right eye, and he was completely stunned. To dash him from the saddle and spring myself into it, was the work of a moment; indeed, the two comb

in vain. Closer-closer-the point of his lance was within two feet of my back. Ah! ah! he delivered the point, and fancy my agony when I felt it enter-through exactly fifty-nine pages of the New Monthl

of the lancer's thrust (as he delivered his lance, I must tell you that a ball came whizz over my head from our fellows, and entering at hi

are standing. I beg you chiu

of my coat, which prevented my sitting at ease. I drew out the Magazine which I had seized, and th

d Cabrera (who is

rilenos," growl

man)," shrieked out Ros d'Eroles, convulsed with laught

of my salvation from the lance of the scoundrelly Christino had been the Magazine containing my own history, their laugh was changed into wonder. I read

ng, as we sat over our cups of tertullia (sangaree), I

of the gleaming pikes; when, with one hand seizing the sacred peishcush, or fish-which was the banner always borne before Scindiah,-he, with his good sword, cut off the trunk of the famous white elephant, which, shrieking with agony, plunged madly into the Mahratta ranks, followed by his giant brethren, tossing, like chaff before the wind, the affrighted kitmatgars. He, meanwhile, now plungi

nd bestowed all kinds of honours and titles on our General. As each of the officers p

I use to this day), that he said, 'Let him be called GUJPUTI,' or the lord of elephants; and Gujputi was the name by which I was afterwa

r occasions when I have found myself in action. One point, however, became in the course of this campaign QUITE evident-THAT SOMETHING MUST BE DONE FOR GAHAGAN. The country cried shame, the King's troops grumbled, the sepoys openly murmured that their Gujputi was only a lieutenant, when he had performed such signal services.

had its origin; a guerilla force, it is true, but one which w

to my standard a great deal faster than to the regular corps in the Company's service. I had European officers, of course, to command them, and a few of my countrymen as sergeants; the rest were all n

ve another which took off a piece of my under- lip, and shows five of my front teeth, I leave you to imagine that 'seldom lighted on the earth' (as the monster Burke remarked of one of his unhappy victims) 'a more extraordinary vision.' I improved these natural advantages; and, while in cantonment during the hot winds at Chittybobbary, allowed my hair to grow very long, as did my beard, which reached to my waist. It took me two hours daily to curl my hair in ten thousand little corkscrew ringlets, which waved over my shoulders, and to get my moustaches well round to the corners of my eyelids. I dressed in loose scarlet trousers and red morocco boots, a scarlet jacket, and a shawl of the same colour round my waist; a scarlet turban three feet high, and decorated with a tuft of the scarlet feathers of the flamingo, formed my head-dress

anger he con

ample all hi

ont the Major

ir as Mars to

aven must sur

dsome, and lik

ocious-looking men, but the Ahmednuggar Irregulars were more dreadful to the view than any set of ruffians on which I ever set eyes. I would to Heaven that the Czar of Muscovy had passed through Cabool and Lahore, and that I with my old Ahmednugg

black-faced, black-dressed, black-horsed, black-bearded men-Biggs, Glogger, and the other officers in yellow, galloping abou

e victory of Laswaree and the brilliant success at Deeg had completely finished him. Taking ten thousand horse he broke up his camp at Palimbang; and the

ousand miles in his front, and knew not in the slightest degree where to lay hold on him. Was he at Hazarubaug? was he at Bogly Gunge? n

y cheek, and my under- lip), and I was obliged to leave Biggs in command of my Irregulars, whilst I retired for my wounds to an English station at Furruckabad, alias Futtygh

all along been called Futtyghur, meaning in Hindustanee 'the-favourite-resort-of-the-white-faced- Feringhees-near-the-mango-tope-consecrated-to-Ram'), occ

ondrous pranks with Lord Lake's army, whilst I was d

here in abundance and variety! The fact is, that, when the campaign commenced in 1803, the ladies of the army all congregated to this place, where they were left, as

Bulcher, wife of Bul

s Bu

se name I beg the printer

nel Vandeg

can and the fo

ver, collected there, and the last words of Lord Lake to me, as I left him, were, 'Gahagan, I commit those women to your char

oter river rolls majestically at its base; and no spot, in a word, can be conceived more exquisitely arranged, both by art and nature, as a favourite residence of the British fair. Mrs. Bulcher, Mrs. Vandegobbleschroy, and the other ma

top of this my flag was planted, and the small garrison of forty men only were comfortably barracked off in the casemates within. A surgeon and two chaplains (there were besid

of the recovery of my health, of the commencement of the shooting season, and indeed as a farewell visit, for it was my intention to take dawk the very next morning and return to my regiment. The three amateur missiona

d been duly feted by every lady and gentleman present; when I took an opportunity to retire on the ramparts, with the interesting and lovely Belinda Bulcher. I was occupied, as the French say

in Gahagan,' said Belind

'they are fireworks of which I have no id

utching tightly hold of my arm: 'what do I see

ey to the devouring element-another and another succeeded it-seven bungalows, before I could al

sands of black forms dancing round the fires; whilst by their lights I could observe columns after columns of Indian horse

'down with the drawbridge! see that your masolgees' (small tumbrels which are used in place of large artillery) 'be well loaded: you, sepoys, hasten

he consternation, shrill the screaming, occasioned by my words. The men stood irresolute and mute with terror; the women, trembling, knew scarcely whither to fly for refuge. 'Who are

who will venture to reconnoitre yon

dead silence. The fact was that Scindiah and Holkar both were so notorious for their cruelty, th

ittle fort, and throw thousands of men against our walls? know you not that, if we are taken, there is no quarter, no hope; death for us-and worse than death for these lovely ones assembled here?' Here the ladies shrieked and

,' sobbed she, 'G

s adored!'

to me on

sw

ous black Mah-ra-a-a- attahs take the fo

rcumstances, it is probable that we ourselves should never have discovered it), were under these painful circumstances made aware of my beloved Belinda's partiality for me. Having communicated thus her wish of self-destruction, I thought her example a touching and excellent one, and proposed to all the ladies that they should follo

mpet was heard at the gate of the fort, and one of the sentinels came running

ty, whoever they might be, had no artillery; and received at the p

ah Gahaga

ve burned, since my arrival, seventeen bungalows in Furruckabad and Futtyghur, and have likewise been under the painful necessity of putting to death three cler

eet with your assent, I beg leave to state that to-morrow I shall storm the fort, and on taking it, shall put to death every male in the garrison, and every female above twenty years

ry obedie

NT ROW

FUTTYGHUR: Sep

S.

ail, and a steel cap and cape, round which his turban wound, was leaning against the gate on his matchlock, and whistling a national melody. I read the letter, and saw at o

the moat. I made him a low salaam, after the fashion of the country, and, as he bent forward to return the compliment, I am sorry to say, I plunged fo

pped him of his turban, cammerbund, peijammahs, and papooshes, and, put

aff, were sound asleep! What I did in my reconnaissance, and how I defended t