Still Inlove With My Ex-Girlfriend

Chapter 1

I'm here now in the school garden, hanging out and lying on the grass. I was disgusted when I saw Russel and Karina together earlier.

The two of them are so perfect, that's why there is so much support in their relationship! I can't even say anything to her because she's really perfect.

I'm the only one who has a crush on Russel, no! Of course, who wouldn't have a crush on the almost perfectionist Russel.

Pogi, beautiful voice, beautiful body too inshort fully packaged! Perfect, perfect, just like Karina.

Beautiful, kind and other things that can be praised about him, when you sit next to him you look like a naughty boy even if you look clean.

But sometimes, I wish I could be Karina.

I just stomped around in annoyance but immediately smiled as I remembered something.

"We made eye contact...hehe." I promised and slightly twirled my hair. Even if we only make eye contact, I'm fine! I'm completely overcome with excitement.

Even if it's 1 second or less than half a second, as long as we just look at each other, I'm okay, I'm really okay.

I'll think about that until I get home. I was smiling like I didn't know, but I was immediately stunned and silenced when I heard a voice.

"Let's break up."

It's like I was shocked because of what I heard, who is that and did they actually break up here? I slowly stood up and peeked between the trees to see who was talking.

My eyes widened and I covered my mouth when I saw who... Russel and Karina?!

Why do they b-break?

I looked at Russel's place as if I couldn't believe what I heard. "B-but why?" I bit my lip because his voice sounded like he was crying.

It looks like he's going to cry, nooo! my baby crush

Karina's face was sad. "We're leaving the country, Russel."

It's like my ears got bigger when I heard it and I moved my body closer to the tree to hear more, I look like a gossip about what I'm doing but it's gossip.

"I will wait for you." I could feel Russel's determined voice.

"No." Karina said firmly, which I swallowed, as if I was tensing up. "I don't know if we'll ever come back here." It's a weak promise and a crying face.

"I'll still wait for you." I feel like I'm going to cry from what I'm hearing.

I never thought that these two would break up because their relationship is almost 'perfect'.

After that, I saw you with my two eyes and my two ears heard how they would break.

"I'm sorry, Russel. But we need to break up.” Karina said and she suddenly cried and left.

I looked at Russel's place who was dumbfounded and didn't seem to have processed what happened.

I was just stunned while walking to the room, even though I didn't process what I saw in my brain.

The almost perfectionist relationship, I can see myself breaking up?!

I got to the room floating, also floating all day and was just dumbfounded in the front while the teachers did not discuss. The things he teaches don't come in because my brain is really occupied.

"Class dismissed."

It was as if I stood up and walked out with my shoulders down, I was the one who was hurt by Russel's current situation.

I just sighed, I regret the relationship between the two of them, how many years have they been together?

Then suddenly they will break up just because Karina is leaving the country? Isn't long distance relationship trendy with her? After all, ldr is difficult in a relationship.

It was break time so instead of going straight to the cafeteria, I took a detour and went to the music room.

I also like to sing but I don't sing much. I only sing when I'm stressed and thinking a lot.

When I entered the music room, the dark surroundings dawned on me, I went straight to the mini stage of the music room and immediately took the guitar.

I sat in the chair and immediately strummed the guitar.

"We keep behind closed doors.

Every time I see you I die a little more.

Stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls.

It'll never be enough.”

I closed my eyes and felt the singing. This is where I go through all my stress in life and no one knows about it.

"Why can't I say that I'm in love?

I wanna shout it from the rooftops.”

I strum the guitar I'm holding even more, why can't I say I'm in love? Because I know I can't get the person I want either.

"I wish that I could be like that.

Why can't it be like that?”

Why am I stressed in their relationship? Maybe I'm just regretting it? I can see how Russel was hurt by what Karina said.

"Because I'm yours."

I stopped strumming the guitar and just bowed.

"You have an angelic voice."

I felt like I was sitting where I was sitting when I heard that voice. I know that voice...

I looked up to see who it was, and I wasn't wrong...

“R-russel.”

Did he hear me sing? Has he been there before?! I swallowed at that thought, add to that I was a bit shocked because he only noticed me now.

Because I'm not like others who chase after a crush. I'm that person who only admires the peg from afar.

Then now, Russel is in front of me... it's russrel oh

"have you been there before?" I swallowed again because of the nervousness I felt and then I stuttered.

"Yeah." this is a short promise.

I was silent because apart from the shortness of his speech, his voice was so cold that it seemed lifeless.

He approached my place so I didn't move immediately, it was bright from my place so I could see his face even more.

It's so serious... add his eyes. I immediately felt a pain in my heart because of the sadness in his eyes. So sad... too much.

He looked at me but his face seemed lifeless. Wow! Is that the effect of Karina's heartbreak? It seems that he really loves Karina.

You can only see the smile of a Russel if you are in front of Karina. That's why his life is so sad now, because he lost his happiness.

I don't want to tell him what I heard just now, because he might just get angry. I'll just let the gossip spread tomorrow, I know tomorrow everyone will know.

I followed him when he suddenly sat in front of me and immediately extended his hand in front of me.

I was surprised and I didn't know what to do. Will he take my hand?

“Guitar.” I looked at him and was stunned.

"Huh?" I answered flatly.

“Guitar.” he repeated so I quickly reached out because he might get annoyed and run away from me.

I don't want that! He's here in front of me so I better make the most of this opportunity.

I just stared at what he was doing that looked like he was adjusting a guitar string. He strummed it and suddenly sang.

"No..." I inhaled when he suddenly sang. "I can't fall in love again." my mouth was tighter.

His voice is so cold! And I can't believe what I'm hearing and seeing now. Russel who is in front of me and even more intense, sings!

"I'll wait for you all my life."

His lyrics are very good! He will be even more broken when he sings!

“I reject destiny.

That you have to disappear.

I'm ready to repeat.

Be yours and confess."

My eyes suddenly watered while looking at him, the pain is just because of his situation and then you add that I have seen and heard everything about how they broke up.

Because if I hadn't seen that, I would have wondered why he was so sad, right?

"That no one else can surpass.

They are all beautiful, they look alike.”

I bite my lips so I don't cry and he might hear, I also don't want him to stop singing maybe because by singing he can release all his feelings.

"There is no one like you.

You are really beautiful.

He is really sweet to Karina, so green flag! "W-why did you leave me?

Is there something wrong with me?”

I held my mouth to stop the sobs that were coming out of my mouth and I was shocked at what my two eyes were seeing.

she's crying

I can't believe that Russel is crying right now in front of me, it looks like he can't stop himself.

He has been writhing and crying really hard. He was probably holding back because someone was looking at him and he didn't want to be embarrassed.

"How can you think, you can't accept me anymore.

No, I can't fall in love again.

I will wait for you forever."

He suddenly stopped strumming the guitar and immediately bowed. He bent down for a few minutes while I stared at him and continued to cry.

It seems like I'm the one who broke up with Shota. Well, it's just the pain.

He raised his head suddenly so we met again, I saw how his forehead was frowning.

"Why are you crying?" he asked making me quiet before wiping my cheek because he might notice that I know something.

"no, you're crying so I cried too." when I excuse "You look like you're heartbroken even though you're not." my excuse

He looked away. "Are you okay?" I will ask. "You know what, whatever your problem is, it can be fixed."

But it looks like it won't be fixed... because Karina is leaving the country and there is no certainty if she will return.

"I hope so." this weak promise. "What's your name?"

I was surprised when he suddenly asked me, is this true? or maybe it's all just a dream?! He's asking my name!

"S-saelah." I bit my tongue because I stuttered.

"Hmm, nice name. It's unique.” it's like a worm tickled my stomach because of what he said.

Unique? Ekekekekekek

"I heard you earlier, you sing well." I calmed down again and my nervousness returned.

"Hehe." I tried to smile at him and avoided looking at him. "Singing is my only stress reliever, but I don't really sing." I explain.

I can see in my peripheral vision how he nodded. He seems to be doing pretty well now, at least he's not thinking about what happened. It's good that he has someone to talk to and have fun.

"So, you'll just sing if you're stressed?" I nodded.

"Yes, when I'm upset, stressed, depressed and so on. All I do is sing, that's where I pour my problems, every lyric I feel." I looked at him and smiled.

"I don't want to drown myself in sadness, I'd rather entertain myself with something else than sulking and wallowing in sadness." I hint.

I want to comfort him in a way that he won't notice. I also want to entertain him somehow so that he won't be sad and feel that he is alone.

I saw that he was silent after what I said. "Singing is a good pastime." I promise. "It's also good to write a song that goes along with your feelings." I added It looked at me. "Yeah, you're right." I smiled widely at him because he agreed with me.

"So whatever your problem is, you can do it! Are you still?!” I encourage him.

But I almost fainted when he laughed softly...

I was stunned in no time by him, I just stared at his face and couldn't really believe it.

Can you imagine that?! I made Russel laugh?! You really won't believe what you see!

It stopped laughing and looked at me. "Why are you staring at me like that?"

I blinked. "You're handsome." I exclaimed.

I saw how he was surprised by what I said, even though I was surprised too!

"A-ah sorry, I can't control myself. You're just so handsome." I was once again surprised by what I said.

Wow! I'm slipping in my own mouth!

My whole face turned red when I heard her laugh, she was laughing again! No, please! "It's okay." he promised me with a smile that almost melted my heart.

Besides the smile, I even made him laugh! Am I so lucky? at least I don't see him crying like before.

"Thank you for making me smile and happy." it promises.

"Hehe, small things." I said as I waved my hand in front of him as if bragging which made him laugh again.

Shh! I seem to be making him very happy. Earlier he spoke very coldly and now he will laugh in front of me?

It's okay Russel, it's ok with me as long as you have fun with me, ekekekek.

It stood up so I looked up, it looked at me. "Nice meeting you, Saelah." I looked at his hand in surprise when he held it out in front of me.

I feel like I'm stuck in my seat, is that it? This is my chance to hold his hand!

I accepted that. "It's nice meeting you, Russel." I felt him gently squeeze my hand and smile at me.

We let go of our hands and he turned away. "See you around if I see you." he was completely out of the music room so in no time I had a big smile.

I looked at my hand where he held it, the softness of his hand! Karina's luck is that she can handle it, even holding hands.

I was relieved to see him laugh and smile at me, but maybe if I tell others about it, they might not believe it.

He only showed them to Karina, so I was really surprised when he smiled and laughed in front of me.

But I know that the happiness I felt for him earlier was only short-lived, because his true happiness is Karina.

He will think about it and think about it, so it is possible that sadness will return to his life. Pity! If it were me, I wouldn't do that to Russel... but it's not me.

But it's okay, at least I talked to him and even held his hand and then he smiled and laughed, oh isn't your grandmother a lucky girl.

While I was busy with the thrill I was feeling, I suddenly stopped, my eyes widened and I immediately stood up.

"Im late

To Be Continued...