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North and South

Chapter 4 Doubts and Difficulties

Word Count: 4004    |    Released on: 18/11/2017

pon some n

I may

int of some

ere, though t

gentler cal

BING

ly occasioned on a busy day. She showed it by brushing away viciously at Margaret's hair, under pretence of being in a great hurry to go to Mrs. Hale. Yet, after all, Margaret had to wait a long time in the drawing-room before her

, could speak as if briefs, success, and all its superficial consequences of a good house, clever and agreeable society, were the sole avowed objects of his desires. Oh dear! how she could have loved him if he had but been different, with a difference which she f

how Dixon had complained that the ironing-blanket had been burnt again; and how Susan Lightfoot had been seen with artificial flowers in her bonnet, thereby giving evidence of a vain and giddy character. Mr. Hale sipped his tea in abstracte

me sighing deeply. Mrs. Hale went out to consult with Dixon about some winter clothing for the poor. Margaret was preparing her mother's worsted w

start. 'Is that tapestry thing of immediate consequence? I mean, can you leave it a

be thought of in marriage; and secondly, she did not know if her father might not be displeased that she had taken upon herself to decline Mr. Lennox's proposal. But she soon felt it was not about anything, which having only lately and suddenly occurred, could have given rise to any

stone, pap

nner, opening his lips to speak several times, but closing them again without having the courage to utter a word.

ear papa? D

ly, and then said with a s

ger be a minister in t

time to time in cathedral towns. They were grand and imposing places, but if, to go there, it was necessary to leave Helstone as a home for ever, that would have been a sad, long, lingering pain. But nothing to the shock she received from Mr. Hale's last speech. What could he mean? It was all the worse for bei

u no longer be a clergyman? Surely, if the bishop were t

u about it. I will answer any questions this once, but after to-night let us never speak of it again. I can meet the cons

o religion?' asked Margare

e paused. Margaret sighed, as if standing on the verge of some new h

nch my smouldering doubts by the authority of the Church. Oh! Margaret, how I love the holy Church from which I am to be shut out!' He could not go

hurches,'- continued Mr. Hale, smiling faintly - 'trying to steal some of th

nd rocking. What could she say? What was to be done? The sight of her distress made Mr. Hale nerve himself, in order to try and comfort her. He swallowed down the dry choking sobs which had been heaving up from h

is hand in hers and grasped it tight, but she could not lift up her head; nor

. Oldfield, minister of Carsington, in Derbyshire, a hundred and sixty years ago, or more. His trials are o

n God will not use thee in one kind, yet He will in another. A soul that desires to serve and honour Him shall never want opportunity to do it; nor must thou so limit the Holy One of Israel as to think He hath but one way in which He can glorify Himself by thee. He can do it by thy silence as well as by thy preaching; thy laying aside as well as thy continuance in thy work. It is not pretence of doing God the greatest service, or performing the weightiest duty, that will excuse the least sin, though that sin capacitated or gave u

closer, 'think of the early martyrs; th

flushed, tear-wet face, 'the early martyrs suffer

t on. 'Your poor mother's fond wish, gratified at last in the mocking way in which over-fond wishes are too often fulfilled - Sodom apples as they are - has brought on this crisis, for which I ought to be, and I hope I am thankful. It is not a month since the bishop offered me another living; if I had acce

w words of self-reproach and humiliation, of which M

the old sad burden we

see. B

gn this vicarage. He has been most kind; he has used arguments and expostulations, all in vain - in vain. They are but what I have tried upon myself, without avail. I shall have to take my deed of resignation, and wait upon the bishop myself,

tings to the pain; it was better to be stunned into numbness by hearing of all these arrangements, which

o walk about again before he answer

ight to expect - and this will be such a blow to her, that I have never had the heart, the power to tell her. She must be told though, now,' said he, looki

- as the force of the blow returned upon herself in trying to realise how another would take it. 'Where are we t

, although his daughter's love had made her cling to him, and for a moment strive to s

The manufacturing

the same desponde

e, papa?'

. Because I know no one there, and no one kno

g their future life, as she saw the gathering gloom on her father's brow. But he, with his quick intuitive sympath

stress turns me sick with dread. If I tell you all, perhaps you could break it to her tomorrow. I am going out for the day,

er life before. She could not speak, all at once. Her father said, 'You dislike it very much, d

e, and I will do it as well as ever I can.

again into a burst of crying. To turn her thoughts, she said: 'Now tell me, papa, what our plans are. You

has always gone to Frederick, since he has been abroad. I don't know if he wants it all,' he

stly treated by his own. A hundred is left Could not you, and I, and mamma live on a

And a hundred a year would go a very little way, after the necessary wants of housekeeping are met, towards providing your mother with all the comforts she has been accustomed to, and ought to have. No: we must go to Milton. That is settled. I c

r all, what did it signify where they w

f doubt became more than I could bear without speaking,

ow who he is. Frederick's godfather - y

on has become such a large manufacturing town. Well, I had reason to suspect - to imagine - I had better say nothing about it, however. But I felt sure of sympathy from Mr. Bell.

said Ma

too bustling for one of his habits - he is obliged to keep up some sort of connecti

at in the world do manufacturers want with the classics

. Some want their children to be better instructed than they themselves have been. At any rate, there is an opening, as I have said, for a private tutor. Mr. Bell has recommended me to a Mr. Thornton, a tenant of his,

t a detestation for all she had ever heard of the North of England, the manufacturers, the people, the wild and bleak country

sked Margaret, aft

ur mother knows nothing about it yet: but I think, in a fortnight; - a

was almos

fort

ious hesitation, as he noticed the filmy sorrow that came over her eyes, and

dedly, as you say. Only mamma to know nothing ab

h, if I were not married - if I were but myself in the world,

y, 'say - tell me it is a night-mare - a horrid dream - not the real waking truth! You cannot mean that you are really going to leave the Churc

rigid stillness

me steady, stony manner, for some moments after he had done speaking. She, too, gazed back with pleading eyes before she would believe that it was irrevocable. Then she arose and went, without another word or look, towards the d

f God be upon t

is blessing might be irreverent, wrong - might hurt him as coming from his daughter, and she threw her arms round his neck. He held her

r in the full consciousness of all that was before them. Mr. Hale hurriedly said -'Go,

ed to the drawing-room in a stunne

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1 Chapter 1 'Haste to the Wedding'2 Chapter 2 Roses and Thorns3 Chapter 3 'The More Haste the Worse Speed'4 Chapter 4 Doubts and Difficulties5 Chapter 5 Decision6 Chapter 6 Farewell7 Chapter 7 New Scenes and Faces8 Chapter 8 Home Sickness9 Chapter 9 Dressing for Tea10 Chapter 10 Wrought Iron and Gold11 Chapter 11 First Impressions12 Chapter 12 Morning Calls13 Chapter 13 A Soft Breeze in a Sultry Place14 Chapter 14 The Mutiny15 Chapter 15 Masters and Men16 Chapter 16 The Shadow of Death17 Chapter 17 What is a Strike18 Chapter 18 Likes and Dislikes19 Chapter 19 Angel Visits20 Chapter 20 Men and Gentlemen21 Chapter 21 The Dark Night22 Chapter 22 A Blow and its Consequences23 Chapter 23 Mistakes24 Chapter 24 Mistakes Cleared up25 Chapter 25 Frederick26 Chapter 26 Mother and Son27 Chapter 27 Fruit-Piece28 Chapter 28 Comfort in Sorrow29 Chapter 29 A Ray of Sunshine30 Chapter 30 Home at Last31 Chapter 31 'Should Auld Acquaintance Be Forgot'32 Chapter 32 Mischances33 Chapter 33 Peace34 Chapter 34 False and True35 Chapter 35 Expiation36 Chapter 36 union Not Always Strength37 Chapter 37 Looking South38 Chapter 38 Promises Fulfilled39 Chapter 39 Making Friends40 Chapter 40 Out of Tune41 Chapter 41 The Journey's End42 Chapter 42 Alone! ALONE!43 Chapter 43 Margaret's Flittin'44 Chapter 44 Ease Not Peace45 Chapter 45 Not All a Dream46 Chapter 46 Once and Now47 Chapter 47 Something Wanting48 Chapter 48 'Ne'er to Be Found Again'49 Chapter 49 Breathing Tranquillity50 Chapter 50 Changes at Milton51 Chapter 51 Meeting Again52 Chapter 52 'Pack Clouds Away'