Bab: A Sub-Deb

ION OF

duction, Body and Conclusion. It should contain Unity, Coherence, Emphasis, Perspecuity, Viv

CT OF

ncident of My Ch

ODUC

er in rigor is

day. Although I was away from this school only four days, returning unexpectedly the

hould know of the injustice of my exile, and that it is al

Is it any fault of mine that my sister Leila

ven maturer in many ways than her older sister, the latter is treated as a young lady, enjoying many privileges, while the former is tr

l. I was very strictly raised. With the exception of Tommy Gray, who lives next d

d to the corner of the next street unattended. If it wasn't Mademoiselle, it was mother's maid, and if it wasn't either of them, it was mother herself, telling me to hold my toes out and my shoulder blades in. As I have said, I never knew any of the Other Sex

iced it, although I have known my parents t

as is shown by the fact that the best families send their daughters here. But to learn life one must know something of both sides of it, male and female. It was, therefore, a m

ried, I venture to say that she was not what Lord Chesterfie

Shakespeare, arranged for the young. We are allowed only certain magazines, the Atlantic Monthly and one or tw

ther, and the result is that when at home at Holiday parti

and our dear principal is a most charming and erudite person. But we see

ealize that I was wrong, and that I am only paying the penalty that I deserve although I consider it most unfair to be given French translation to do. I do not

good or bad, but thinking

OF

what happened during the first f

school were getting new clothes for Christmas parties, and their Families were sending on

sent on four that I was to accept, with tiped acceptances for me to copy and send. She also sent m

rter Brooks on New Year's Day. Carter Brooks is the well-known Yale

m now here in sackcloth and ashes, which is a figure of speech for the Peter

d the desired measurements, and sat down to cheerfully while away the t

ece, for in a few days I received a l

ted at being called "Dearest." The signature too was charming, "Ever thine." But, dear child, won't you write at once and

t I had sent him the let

the holidays, especially the low neck. Also I disliked very much ha

home, we talked a great deal about things. Especially Love. I felt that it was rather over-done, particularly in fiction. Also I felt and obs

ay that I look li

-I refrain from giving her name had-a Code. You read every th

out crazy this week to go home. Se

what it really said was

o secrets, as they have quarreled and

f a career, I was a man-hater. I acknowledge that thi

tobacco smoke. Women," I said, "are only their playthings. And when the

object of my attachment having been the tenor in our church choir at home. I daresay I should have denied the soft impeachmen

e transgressor

stmas. Father and my sister Leila, who from now on I will term "Sis,"

d turned her che

her beauty. In the morning she is plain, although having a good skin. She was trimmed up with a

t word. Shabby. If you have to hang your entire wardrobe in a closet ten inches deep, and put it over

e slipped ten dollars in my purse in the motor. I needed it very much, as after I had paid the porter and bought luncheon, I had only three d

id, while I hugged father, "you

I retorted, "but at least I shan't need it on m

t!" she said, and s

strain her enthusiasm. She put her hands over some orchids she was weari

e Easter hats,

fear, Barbara," mother observed

" I regret to confess that I replied. And I saw

red. Sis had everything, and what had I? And when I got home, and saw that Sis had had her room done over, and ivory toilet th

there was still the dent in the mantel where I had thrown a hair brush at

came to help me off with my things. I slammed the

was then and there that I made up my mind to show them that I was no longer a mere child. That the time was gone when they could shut me up in the nurs

next afternoon that the thing sprung (s

a went over my clothes. They sat, Sis in pink chiffon and mother in black and silver, and Hannah took o

I am the family Cinderella, I admit it. But it isn

ld, and a very untidy child at that. What do you do with your elbows

"am I to have t

Very s

n the

ot. A small

d neck." She ro

ock me, Barbara,"

und my shoulders to hide the bones!

girl," mother said, looking up at m

self, there will be no parties

broke the camel's back.

hat I shall get marri

ntion of taking the fatal step? But it wa

hite. She clutched me

u saying?" s

er" I said, very politely.

? Barbara,

know. A

mother" Sis said. "There isn't

I said in a dark an

I heard her go into father's dressing-ro

e dancing teacher? Or your ridin

ss a

mpleton to get tied up to some wre

. I am naturally truthful, and deception is hateful to me. But when my sister uttered the above disparaging rem

out him," I said. "An

s she stood up and stared at me, "how muc

ed. The family kitten, to speak in allego

seemed to be nobody. They knew perfectly well that the dancing master had one eye and

ttle there had been in it but imbibing wisdom and playing basket-ball and tennis, and typhoid fever

ith firmness. "Never again, if I have

ppearance of Hannah with a mending ba

che, and passionate eyes. I felt, too, that he would be jealous. The eye

t they would see the point. If I was old enough to have a lover-especially a jealous o

all, I counted my money. I had thirteen dollars. It w

ra," mother said when t

if I write a l

wh

" I said, and she s

nsent or not. Leave it on the hall table,

out to the

doing anythin

ll," I respo

ste about it, give i

well,"

excited, and happier than I had been for weeks. But when I had settled myself in the library, with

o

you seem s

hat you w

ong to he

I love y

cold and drea

who with

t soon we

away an

ible. It would show, I felt, that things were really serious and impending. A love

Which was to actually threaten my reason and which, flying on winged feet, was to send me back here to school the day after Christmas and put my seed pearl necklace in

ot milk, with a Valentine's mal

old. On the spot I named him Harold Valentine, and I wrote the name on the envelope t

Harold Valentine, he could not call for the letter at the post office, and would therefore not be able to cause me any trouble, under any circumstances. And,

norant of the fact that destiny, "which never swerves, nor

ave it to Hannah. She went out the front door with it, as I had expected, but I watched f

ed. I ought to have been suspicious for that very reason. When things go very well

thily and did some shopping. First I bought myself a bunch of vi

ite, white rose. H."

end. I am like that in everything I do. But, on deliberating things over, I felt that Violets, alone and unsupported, were not enough. I f

young man in a checked suit with a small mustache-the young man, of course, not the suit. Unluckily, he w

name of mine, but because it is romantic in sound. Also because I

and probably take it to mother. I wanted to buy a ring too, to hang on a ribbo

s and I wrote on the photograph, in lar

under the pillow. "You look like a phot

uated, it was.

the vibrator used on her hair, and her manner was changed. I guessed that there

e said. "I hope you wer

other. I always have

in a very pa

ngs?" mother aske

vaguely. "Life is su

t. Unless one

t's hard to know what to do. The only way, I supp

Hannah," mother snapped. "Now then, Barba

me? No

eing a sil

n. And at seventeen there are problems. After

to have any nonsense. You must

What

driveling young Fool. I'm not blind

?" I said in a gentle voice. "But if there wa

ng the wrong method, for she changed her tactics. "It's the fault of that silly school," she said.

ned them herself, her mouth set. "My love is like a white,

id meekly. This was

fuss. It ended by mother offering me a string of seed pearls for Christmas, and my party

said, "to-to break things off. I cannot tear

snif

"One letter. I trust yo

that "Man's life is but a jest, a dream, a

, with little bunches of roses here and there on it, and when she and the dressmaker were haggling over the roses, I took the scissors and cut the n

ure that Sis threw a cigarette in the fire when I went in. When I think of my sitting here alone, when I have done NOTHIN

he children, Leila," he said

is not Methuselah. Although

the room five minutes before I knew that they all knew. It turned out later that Hannah was engaged to the Adams' butler, and she had to

rather a good time. Carter sat down at the piano and struck

ing to me, "that's wrong. It

ot. The word

on one side. "Strange that both you

eling of uneasine

Carter insis

ong day's shopping, tea is the only thing that keep

eyes on me. "Barbara, come into the den a momen

d lifted a book from the table

!" she said. "Where

t your aff

it my affair. Did

ad what's wr

id you m

am by nature truthfu

scho

met him at school! What was he

cuti

Harold,

, if I chose to call him that, w

'm perfectly sure you want me to take the th

cost me a dollar. It was quite brown when I got i

things," I said with dignity. And

ertone when I got there. I knew it was about me. A

said. "Just fight it o

k, I felt that they might as well have something to talk about. As Jane's second cousin once removed is in this school and as Jane will probably write

hey can't really do anything. And the

e and break it off," I

't matter." There was a thrill in her voice. Had I n

and I was starving. But I waved the

to make the average family wake up to the fact that the youngest daughter is not the family baby at seventeen. All I was doing was furnishing th

it. So I wandered into the den, and it occurred to me to write the

l day that I was deceived. But the real reason was a new set of furs. I had secured the dresses and the promise of the necklace on

LETTER, THERE WOULD

the family objected to him, and that this was to end everything between us. They had started the phonograph in the library, and were playing "The Rosary." So I end

set of furs, they were welcome to mail it. It would go to the dead letter office, since there was no Harold. It could not come back to me, for I had only sign

of mice and men gan

he room just as I sealed it

id. "I suppose all the customary Xmas kisses a

underst

I think I could bear up bett

w it concerns y

years! First as a baby, then as a sub-sub-deb, and now

led your infat

. A green and yellow melanc

," I said in a

ooked at it. Then he s

isn't possible! It

es got cold. I nev

is Harold Valenti

his hand to me. "Congratulations, Barbara," he said heartily. "Since you absolutely refuse me, you couldn't do better. He's the

ut of the air, so to speak, and off a malted milk tablet, and t

id desperately. "It-it's a common nam

've got him pinned to the wall! I'll tell you what I'll do, Barbara. I'm a real friend of yours. Always have

it t

that, don't you? He's in

said in a ga

ant it as a surprise to you. Y

t before my very eyes, and sat down

ng down. Not interested in anything. Of course this explains it. He's the sort to take L

icture was underneath. He pounced on i

suppose. Yes, it's Hal, all right

rvous chill. I was compelled to prop my chin

t from me to see love's young dream wiped out by a hardhearted family. I'm going to see this thing through. You count on me, Barbara. I'll arra

night," I

ht it is. It's the Adams

y dear family and now I was to pay the penalty. He would know at once that I had made him up, o

entine, the family will be on, you know. We'd better

ically. "I think I'd

nor's a good name. Ted Grosvenor-that ought to hit them be

in and poured her a cup of tea, with his little finger stuck out

ted t

e thing. It could not be true. I went upstairs and manicured my

and must lie in it. And just then Hannah slipped

she said. "If your

ened the box, and clutched the envelope inside. It said "f

in her apron and her eyes w

with her silly teeth chattering. "Oh, Miss Barbara, if P

I said. "As if it was an empty box. And pu

me in just then and they met in the doorway. She saw it a

the Servant's table." Then, when the door had closed, she turned to me. "Just one more ridiculou

She looked exactly as gentle as a macadam pavement. I am one who has to be handled with gentleness. A kind

far as I am concerned. I refused to yield an inch, and it ended in my having my dinner in my room, and moth

ntly wrong except that mother was very dignified with me, I began to fe

you?" s

'm all

thing

smooth

I'm just crazy about i

were crazy ab

's coming. I'll have to ring off. But don't you give in, Bab. N

father and mother, and got out of it somehow. But all the

But as I would not lie and say that I was ill-I am naturally truthful,

e party, except a slight description,

ng with youngsters that one saw last in their perambulators. It is rather startling to have about six feet of black trouser legs and white shirt front come a

I shall describe the ball room of the

ristmas," in electric lights, and the chandeliers were made into Christmas trees and hung with colored balls. One of the balls fell off during

when I think of the silver things Sis always brought home, and remember that I took away about six Christmas stockings, a to

h me, and in th

o be careful. The fa

the family is half as upset as I am,

wanted the motor later. And while Hannah was on her knees taking off my carriage boots

th your new dress and all! It's as much as my life

. There would be a riot if

ea sets me up like anything when I'm nervous. Now please be a go

d not, although I could not have run

I would be a homeless wanderer on the earth. For I felt that never, neve

ping the tea and she stood o

look here" She bent over me and whispered it. "Don't trust Carter too much. He is perf

response. "As for trusting hi

ne," she observed. But she was t

aid has a drawer full of rouge. I'm going to se

sly. "I think I'll sprain my ankle and go

that got to do with it? I don't underst

ring," I sa

te. Hannah was hanging up my wraps, and d

cotillion for me," it sai

thlessly. "Don't tell me he is

before I could speak.

ce the cotillion with him although I shall probably be d

t remind the school, when she was skating on thin ice, I was frightened. I remember that, inside the door, Jane said "Courage!" in a low tense voice, and that I stepped on somebody's foot a

arbara. Every

as C

"We'd better go through the formality of an introd

nt to tell you something first. I'

you be calm, and there's no reason why you two can't have the evening

rte

note, did

s,

"Miss Archibald, I would lik

p and looked down at me. IT WAS THE MAN OF THE PICTURE

always agreeable. And I have discovered something else. The moment anybody is crazy about me I begin to hate him. It is curious, but

r said in cautious tone. "Don'

e lef

But at the time I was too much occupied with hating him to care about dancing, or anything. But I was compelled by my pr

ot away from the band, "think o

is it? We've got to be to

long a day as this has been. The thought

said freezingly. "You know perfectl

little letter in my breas

d breast pockets in t

said. "How well you dance-only, let me lead, won't you? How st

desperately. "Can't we go so

circumstances? If we are to overcome the family o

apped. "I know perfectly well

tell you what I am thinking. You've saved the cotillion for me, h

in a trap, and Carter, watching from a corner, looked exactly like a cat. If he had taken

claimed me for the next. Jane ca

fectly handsome. And oh, Bab, he's wil

said coldly. "And don

t me with he

him, pass him on to me,"

kers, and a full head shorter than I am. But that's the way with a Party for the school crowd, as I've said before. They ask

, with no sense of time whatever. Jane is not pretty, but she has nice eyes, and I am not

. Adams, who is fat and rotates his partner at the corners by swinging her on his waistcoat. Carter did not dance

ry him, that I would die first. But I was favored a great deal, and when we did have a chance th

verandah, which was closed in with awnings. He ha

, "this has

nderstand

" I stormed. "I can't st

th the little girl with the eyes! Honestly, Bab, I was only

could, "that this whole thing h

said solemnly, "that you

ectly wild

e mad to see me, and that-it is almost too sacred to repeat, even to YOU-that you would alw

. But it doesn't mean anything. There CAN'T be any Harold Valentine; beca

am not going to be played with. And you are not going to jilt me without a reason. Do you mean to deny everything? Are you going to say, for instance, that I

Perkins brought me a toy balloon, and

per, with bullion and creamed chicken and baked ham and sandwiches, among other things. But o

For if it is not a tragedy to be engaged

was handsome. She wasn't going to have to marry him. I detest dimples in chins. I always have. And anybody could see that it wa

and I came down, he was at the door, waiting. Hannah was loaded down with silly favors, and lagged behin

omorrow, DEARES

ad. Hannah had dropped a stocking-not her own. One o

ht, Bab. When I have seen your fat

dare to see

went on, without paying any attention to what I h

to see that we were covered with the robes, and he tucked Hannah's feet in. She wa

he's the One. And he has nice manners. So considerate. M

Hannah," I said. "He's

ngs at home without a word. When I was in bed, how

, Miss Barbara. You are that cros

away,"

w about these goings on. You're only a little girl, with all your high and mi

hes over my head,

urry, and without really loving him, and when she had been married a year, and hated the very way her husband drank his coffee and cut the ends off his cigars, she found some one sh

loved her husband after all, but he had had to shoot himself before she found it out, although not fatally-"but the written word doe

l it. And it turned out that the other man h

money when I am of age, from my grandmother. I saw it all. It was a tra

TER THAT PUT M

ope that it would make me tidy, and father had bought me a set of silver fox, which mother did not approve of, it be

makes a champagne punch, and somebody pours tea, although nobody drinks it, and t

d mother sorted it over, while father

at the addresses and passed them round. But suddenly

, Barbara," she said. A

s set as she tore off the paper and opened the box. There was a

her, in a terrible voic

began, in an

h a book from a man!" she went

do was to bear it. For I had made a Frankenstein-see the book read last term by the Literary Society-not out of grave-yard fragments, but

re does

t know,

t him a

w where he l

will you ask Hannah to

me the book?" I asked. "

d to be going into the fire at that time. I cannot help wondering what they would have done if it h

ected mother to tell him, and I daresay I should not have been surprised to see my furs follow the book. I had g

r everything on this School, and mother had chosen the School. My father had not been much impressed by the catalog.

e was that she disliked confessing that sh

m, for fear the door-bell would ring, and a letter or flowers would arrive from H. I

the butler, gave notice three hours after he had received his C

ut of his cradle and came to call on me, and coughed all the time, with a whoop. He developed the whooping cough later. He had on his first long trouser

ind him was H. He had seen me before I saw him, and he had a sort of sickly grin, meant to denote joy. I wa

gret to say that I said, "vegetarian." Carter Brooks came over to

bring him. He's known as Grosvenor here, of course. They'll

't see

up You are a pair of idiots, quarreling over nothing. Poor old Hal is a

broken tones. "Go away,

setting his jaw. "He's here for that, and you know it

e to let him s

ged his

Tell him yourself, if you've changed your mind. I don't intend,"

his is slang, and does not belong in a

id I gave the bishop quite a prod, and I caught Mr. A

was to

, was at the punch bowl, and father was gone. I was just in

t once to run away and go on the stage, and I had even got part way up the stairs, when I remembered that, with a dollar for the picture and five dollars for the violets

S TR

it me? Or would the whole family conspire together, when the people had gone, and send me to a convent? I made up my mind, if it was th

convent, nun or

nvent. I pinned a towel around my face, the way the nuns wear whatever they call them, and from the side

waited, and when I heard father I got cold all over. But he went on by, and I heard him go into mother's room and cl

irst down. HE CA

true. I could no

d me with a

y as if nothing had happened

a basilisk, that

Father," I replied. I co

ing room mantle, and he turned

height. "And lovers already! Well, I dares

se, if you intend to shove me off your hands, to the firs

trying to say, before your mother comes down, is that I-well, that I understan

you mean by

ortable, being one who

made it very clear that you do-I am going to see that you do it. You are young, of cou

ed, from an ove

. "And I shall not thwart you, or allow you to be thwarte

ething!" I cried. "I wi

I like the young man, and give you my blessing, or what is the pre

d on me and was rending me, so to speak. With a bre

hours I pac

but to tell the family that was to confess all. And I would never confess. I would run away

tep leads down and down, to crime and even to death. Oh never, never, g

ever retrieved." Gra

ith a letter. "The written word does not change," she had said. "It

d him, in my agony. I felt that if only I had never written the Letter there would have been n

ith a sheet, had brought a man out of a perfectly empty cabinet, by simply willing to do it. The cabinet was

ialized him,

do not dream of in our philosophy." Was H. a real person, or a creature of my

ared

really, and I married

me, and by half past ten I was alone with my misery. I knew Carter Brooks would be at the ball, and

is will. And at last she had gone to the apartments of the man who had her letters, in a taxicab covered with a heavy veil, and had got them back. He had

tters, so he went to South Africa and was gore

he was powerless. The trouble was that I did not know where he was staying. Even

ad no chance in the world. But if he was stopping at a hotel I thought I could manage. The man in the book had had an apartment, with a Japanese servant, who went away and drew plan

ng Christmas and her brother-in-law having a wake,

ub and got Carter Bro

m writing a letter. Wher

ho

. Gros

ittle heart! Writing, are

does he

burbled. (This is a word from Alice in Wonder Land, an

be married off without my consent, but I am no

m here, if you wa

no need to smuggle him. The family is cra

"Who'd have thought it! Shal

to talk to him

to believe you. Don't take these little quarrels too hard,

e in a cabin

I don't ge

Where shall I s

fter eleven by that time, and by the time I had got into my school mackinto

slipped out and closed the door behind me, and looked for a taxicab, but the veil was so

s a private car, but I'll take you

h was using our car for a taxicab! And just as I was about to speak to h

le to think that Smith could go on renting our car to all sorts of people, cov

he arcade, giving the man a quarter, althou

and I felt that h

ng up the money, "is

worthy he was not s

what,

ven me here, YOU HAVE NOT" I exp

ng a match to look at it. Then he re

There was only a hall boy there, asleep in the elevator, and I looked at

t the boy was half asleep, and evidently he took me for some one who belonged there, for he said "Goodnight" to me, and

ESCENSUS I

hat fatal portal, without a sinking of the heart. I had, however, had sufficient foresight to prepare an alibi. In case there was so

table, and a shaded electric lamp, and beyo

and the remains of a wood fire in the f

ee to work, and I then looked around the room. There were a number of photographs of rather smart looking girls, and I curled my lip scornfully. He might have fooled them but he could not deceiv

e suddenly as strange that if he was only visiting, under an assumed name, in order to see me, that so many people should be writing to

STERY. All at

eemed to be full of bills, and so was the one below it. I had j

id some one

d slowly, and m

OPENED, AND A GENTLEMAN IN HIS E

and locked the door into the hall. I was absolutely unable to speak. I tri

I wish you would tell me some good reason wh

se don't!

sit down and give you a little time. I ta

said. "Maybe you'll think that's an excuse a

It's pretty well known, I fancy, that I hav

ing," I replied

it from the record. Would you mind telling me whose apartment yo

oking for

etters. Although"-he looked at me closely-"you look rather young for t

ronizing ways, he was

unds fishy, I must say-it's hardly a police matter, is it? It

," I replied stiffly. "How do

wrong apartment, Even then it's rather unusual. I find a pale and determined looking young lady going through my desk in

ove letter

it is true, be proud of it. Love is a wonderful t

ve," I cried wi

t is not YO

rote

on that does not exist-t

nted tone. "I can't bear it. If you

re is so naive, that I-won't you tell me why you wrote a love letter, if you are not in love? And whom you sent it to?

ather cheered, "but it was not intended for an

ourse. It is often d

I felt that way about it. So I made up

ets!" he said, lo

"Hannah-that's mother's maid, you know-brought in some hot mi

iced and quite calm, but isn't the

and the tablets, I should think," I said, growing sa

for the malted milk. Although you have not yet stated the name you chose; I never heard of any one named

," I said, bending forward, "there was no such person. I

erhaps, but I have a g

s clear, isn't it? And now he considers that we

nderstand. I don't blame him at all.

terly, "you would be on

there was no such person, how can there be such a person? I am merely asking to get it all clea

he is," I said, hopelessly. "An

s not unusua

t the picture in a shop, and just pr

and paced

mind if I light a cigarette? It helps to cl

, because of my family. They think I am a mere child

ME? Oh I see!

I said. "The

ow let me get this straight. You wrote a letter, and somehow or other he got it, and now y

in exci

g, the letter is probably here. W

et you slip away

telling him the truth. It was maddening. An

ou can lock me in here, if you are afraid I will run aw

ony, commit larceny, and be an accessory after the fact does not troubl

se!"

ed down

one, murder would be one of the easies

nd after I had described it-t

in the past few days! That I might never have started on my path of deception! Or that, since my intentions at the start had been so inn

palpitated. For what if H. had returned e

es after one he came back, entering by the window

d and fitted his key in the lock. I am not at all sure," he said, wiping his hands with his handkerchief, "that he will not regard the

art gave a great lea

nd while it is coming suppose you tell me the thing over a

, and never getting to bed until dawn. And that they treated me like a mere child, which was the re

cumstances. But it is odd to have had the very person materialize, so to speak. It makes me wonder-well, how about burning the letter, now we've got it? It would

n the telephone rang and

said, "and maybe we can smuggle you into the

I had imagined him with a small, dark mustache, and deep, passionate eyes? Well, this Mr. Grosvenor had both, or rath

ll the world to choose from, I

a chance to talk, he said. But he was asleep again, and w

of it-but I might have known, all alon

e got to the

ver forget you and this evening. And save me a

And then we drew up in front of the house and he helped me out, and my entire fa

nywhere in sight. "Well, good night and good luck!" And he got int

ain, for mother went into hysterics, after accusing me of having men dangling a

m that night when I was in bed, and stood looking down at me.

e in the world do you pick them all up? Things

d languidly. "It's no punishment to send me aw

CLU

g in the finishing touches. I intend to have it typed in the village and to send a copy to father, who I think will understand, and anothe

o came out handsomely with an apology this mo

went to college with, who had gone on the stage and was playing in a stock company at home. Only they were not playing Christmas week, as business, he says

pretend he was Harold Valentine. Only thin

d, he felt it wasn't square. He went to your father to explain and apologized, but your father seemed to think you needed a l

hter perfectly wretched and do nothing to help. And more than

ho got the jolt, I think, when

n, for a time. A little wor

nd him his co

ox of roses, with no card, but a pen and ink drawing of a gentleman in evening clothes crawling

ith a few reflections drawn from my own sad and tragic Experi

eems to be going all right, and no rocks ahead. When suddenly the breakers loom up, and y

tangled W

we practice

alter