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Gray youth

Chapter 10 “IL FAUT QU’ UNE PORTE—”

Word Count: 5922    |    Released on: 06/12/2017

zled Amory a little. Sometimes he seemed changed, sometimes (barring the hair) exactly as before. Sometimes he told Amory all about his business, and sometimes seemed more than ordinarily interested

said-this on a distin

?sthetic delight in the way they "came." He had reminded her a little of the Antin?us. But now he reminded her of nothing save of a young human animal of the opposite sex. He wore starched white collars too, and went about in a hat.... O

all. This was late on a Saturday evening; in order to bring the bent door flush with the batten Amory had to sit down on one end of it; and the lamp stood on the floor between them as Cosimo, kneeling, screwed. The

ast. "I think that'll

lly, Cosimo," Amo

vent Garden," Cosimo continued. "If I could have got in, anybody e

ow what I'm safe from," she added. "Jellies' young

Amory wondered whether he was glad to chang

lace, all bright green, newly enamelled. And he isn

o exclaimed. "Wh

s back; Amory had thought he was about to rise altogether; but she herself did not move, and he sat down again, cross-legged, on the other end of the door. He asked further questi

e grunted, "but I suppose it's too late to g

pected the hinge. Then she gave a little la

ldn't bother about it. Leave it till to-mor

ted Cosimo. "Oh no.

pparently, Amory saw

rst! As if anybody but you ever came up here nowadays-and even you only once in awhile!" Th

ave 'em?" Cosimo retorted.

before! Why, if a person's made up his mind to do a thing, how will a door stop it? And if it won't, why a door? Yo

ly. "I know we've got quite down to fundamentals.

one tiny in either brook-brown eye. Somehow Cosimo fe

you.... Why," she suddenly made a soft little appeal an

notice her hands. His o

ory, really-really I h

d critically a little on one side. "You ma

out, revolted. "O

e it, it's nothing to be ashamed of-I mean that 'ashamed' isn't quite the

ve changed my mind about that, I hope, Amory? We came t

ttle appeal. Her fingers touched C

r intellectual identity. That's been such a beautiful thing. Ha

' Amory-it is," C

an the same things by them, and-oh, how rare that is! Of course, I know your uncle's dead, and that may have upset you, and you've all sorts of business about property and so on on your mind, but I

m had changed. A person might change from prejudice and intolerance to t

's muddle. I simply couldn't bear to sloven along, keeping up a pretence of friendship that was simply an intellectual hypocrisy. Either we still think the same about the great basic facts of Life,

ing her dauntless brow; her chin was held high above the bluebell-stalk of a throat, the lids were dropped over the shallow, gold-flecked eyes. As if she saw before her the bleak prospect of years to come without t

't look like that." This

she asked, wi

t all your fancy. You're a bit run down,

d, closing the eyes again and pas

ou something-knock a c

nk you,

ally worried ab

Cosimo. These thin

esolutely, "tell me what you've been doing with yourself this past week, and I'll bet I

anted, t

expect. You haven't

n't brush my hair; if you wouldn't mind

ver her with the water he had fetched, "I used to be

ink it would do this one any good-and I really th

it m

ng me a hand up? I expect I shall

curtained corner where the bed lay. Then he

ug of water by yo

Tchekoff-the lit

n bed's the very wor

h their works.... When are you going away again? I suppose you'll be giving up the studio in March? I shall go out for a long walk to-morrow by myself. I'll prop the door up after you,

Cosimo was muttering; "look here, shall I try to fix it up again as it was? Afraid the screwholes wouldn't hold, though;

well, if

wait till Monday...

fect

see how you are.... Good night." He

d ni

re how very pretty she was. He had known she was pretty, but not how pretty; perhaps she hadn't been quite so pretty before?... And now Cosimo came to think of it, he had been noticing lately whether girls were pretty or not. Somehow Pattie Wynn-Jenkins had got him into the way of it. Pattie, whose father's plantation adjoined the western boundary of the grazing that was now Cosimo's own, was pretty herself, and seemed to raise the question.... Still, Cosimo had no

glad that Amory didn't suspect there

morning; but she was dressed and ready for going out. He was lucky, she said, to have caught her; she would have b

aw that the night had only set higher their clear cou

would be wise?" s

e asked, tak

e answered indiffer

while I've been away-everything we've agreed a self-respecting woman can't be any longer: a mere man's toy, a chattel, property, on sale just as much as if she was in an Oriental slave-market, economically dependent, hopelessly apathetic to everything that's fine and feminist and new--" He knew that Amory would have called that "facing the facts." But something, he knew not what, held him back. Oh, it was none of the things you might have thought-that Amory might make more of it than there had been (indeed, there had been nothing), nor that he realized that the whole truth can never be told, and that the more you expl

e silence. It was as they a

slowly-"I've been

nue. As she delayed to do

ng again-why you d

Dorothy would never have married him: but there was something of the still, of the rapt, about Amory th

eal vitality of thought. An idée fixe isn't an idée at all; it's a Law that in course of time thoughts become p

d earnest

but Amory interr

of that side of her nature and a little suppression of the other and Dorothy would be an almost ideal wife for an advanced and fine-thinking man. It's merely her Environment that doesn't give her a chance. Of course, from the point of view of Eugenics, those people of hers may be a little epuisées; intermarried too much: but she doesn't show it-she may b

y's earnestness, dissemble his quailing with a laugh. "But

k yourself whether th

ter further examination of it. "And besides, you've rather sp

e beautiful still to look back on. I don't conceal from you, Cosimo, that qui

ast tense again, Amory! Really, I-

you'd miss me

ime he did give a li

ember. Dorothy's used to me. We are friends. Another girl might

d that I want to marry at all?" Cosimo c

him; then she moved

you only knew it, Cosimo," she replied. "A man has only his int

on I want to get married?"

ve and honour and all the time you're absolutely in the dark. You may not want to at this moment. But you don't know t

his arm Cosimo had a li

lived on Chiswick Mall, hardly a stone's-throw from where they were. They were passing the "Dove

Moreover, to call on the Masseys would recall enlivening thoughts of that merry wedding day when Mr. Wellcome had

osimo enthusiastically

ting her hand on the knob of a tall wrought-iron g

f a torch-extinguisher. Already Aunt Jerry had waved her hand from the drawin

and I," said Amory, kissing her aunt whe

affected

u see I haven't forgotten I was to call you Cosimo-I really don't think George would have had you in the house. But I forgive you now you are here. George will be back f

enough in style to be antique and not new enough to be anything but what doubtless some of them were-second-hand. But the panelling was pleasant, and the airy view up the river delightful. Aunt Jerry pointed out the view to Cosimo at once; she s

rch; and Miss Crebbin (do you remember Miss Crebbin?)-she's bringing her young man. But I ought to say that our

avement, but, after all, a loss can be felt as deeply in tweeds as in anything else, and the glance had seemed to admit that perhaps it wasn't altogether a bad thing that the old custom of extravagant funerals, often at the expense of the needs of the living, was dying

Massey arrived with Mrs. Deschamps. They were followed a few minutes later by Miss Crebbin and

Pratt; they're a penny, and I've had dreadful turns with them! But I simply cannot call you 'Mr. Pratt.' It isn't like Glenerne here. I admit it's best to be on the safe side there, but at Oasthouse View we're a family party-aren't we, George? And don't I come on

softly over his teeth, entering into

n a stage whisper that it was already a

ur of its own. Cosimo had only one uneasiness, which was that Amory was perhaps not well enough in health to extract the last particle of savour from all this taking-for-granted. She sat next to Mr. Allport, but said little. She ate hungrily of roast beef and Yorkshire pudding, and quite agreed when Mr. Allport said what "an A1 little pitch Oasthouse View was." Then Mr. Allport talked water-rates an

that Amory was no

did not contain, pretended to be in doubt, and "thought there ought to be a little port somewhere." He found it, and the three m

at half-past three, they passed t

een wasted; Amory was quite her old self again. That, Cosimo thought, was t

have heard the priceless thi

ously bucked by

rture-do tell m

e Deschamps woman-and that doll of a girl who's going to love, honour, obey, and

" said Cosim

and-mighty man again; quite too superior; hopes that as long as he says nothing he'll be taken for wise, as somebody says. B

ather as the head of the Family an

es

ental De

poti

poral pu

-al puni

ice for

Authorit

the mere pla

playthin

ope

hatt

at home with

est

-Jo

o whi

surprise you," said Amory

-I'm thund

en lunching in a regular

um? A c

hat we lived in this Ye

, I should

een all right. It would have been proper to their stage of d

clock are to be

e say his rule-of-thumb ca

postors,

nt as well? Why, it's making him judge and executioner and all the lot!... And those, Cosimo," she went on, with still deeper gravity, into which contempt crept, "are my aunt's and uncle's ideas! Violence, harshness, and repression. Russianizing the Home, instead of abolishing it altogether, or only allowing it under the very strictest inspection, in such cases as when a parent has really proved his fitness for Child-culture! The Home!... Oh, when will the dawn come?" She turned up the pretty eyes to the sky; she spoke passionately. "Aunt Jerry fit to be a Mother of the Race! Why," she broke out wither

st a pity she painted, so magnificent a lecturer was lost in her. Not that just at present she was painting very much. She was doing better than painting. With all the

ey said they were 'in love,' would you? But it is so, Cosimo. That's exactly their mental development. They are exactly as advanced as the animals. Neither more nor less.... Mind you, I don't deny what's called 'love' altogether. I suppose it does serve some such purpose as the perfume does to the flower. The perfume attracts insects, and insects do fertilize some flowers. So love has its place.

, Amory," Cosimo said, a little uneasily, as if he per

once he did kiss my hand.... Cosimo"-she lifted the golden eyes almost bashfully, and then dropped them again-"I said last night that there ought perhaps to be an end of our friendship. Not an end, I mean, because I should always respect you and honour your views. And I still think it might be best. But-I don't know whether I should have the strength to do

tburst. Again, for no reason that he could have explained, Cosimo felt a brute.... He paw this bright

liking Mr. Hamilton Dix more inte

t know whose-rather fancied that she

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