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Sinister Street, vol. 2

Chapter 9 THE LESSON OF SPAIN

Word Count: 7693    |    Released on: 06/12/2017

us editions of Don Quixote as possible. He had brought up from London the fat volume illustrated by Doré over wh

e "Q" and the "X" repeated on the back of volume after volume that positively gave Michael an impression in literal design of the Knight's fantastic personality. The very soul of Spain seemed to be symbolized by those sere quartos of the seventeenth century, nor was it imperceptible even in Smollett's cockney rendering bound in marbled boards. Staring at the row of Don Quixotes on a dull December afternoon, Michael felt overwhelmingly a desire to go to Spain himself, to drink at the source of Cervantes' mighty stream of imagination which with every year's new reading seemed to him to hold more and more c

In London she was wasting time. Mother was continually wanting her to come to the theater. It seemed almost as if mother were trying to throw her in the way of marrying Prescott. He had certainly been

o talk vaguely to him of the advantage for Stella in marrying Prescott. The idea was preposterous. He would be angry with his mother, and he would blurt out to Prescott his dislike of such a notion. He wou

hat Castleton with whom he had arranged to go to Rome had felt at the la

Maurice argued. "As

there will occur the moment in my life when I shall say, 'I am ready to go to Rome. I must go to Rom

en hinted Michael ought to come to Rome simply for the fact that he him

sisters are allowed to have their own way. Why can't Mrs. Castleton go to Bath by herself? I'm sure C

ve there," said Michael. "No, thanks. If you don't want to come to Spa

do in Spain?" asked

began

ed out. "Or if the fandango is too ha

urice was persisting, bu

eless, Mossy. I am

e to go to Spain," said Mau

rity could a passport be deemed necessary for Rome, Maurice decided it was an overrated city and became at once fervidly Spanish, even to the extent of saying "gracias" whenever th

Mrs. Fane. The Rugby match against Cambridge was visited in a steady downpour. Wedderburn fetched his luggage, and the

nt vegetable. Michael darling, why are you laughing? Isn't it a vegetable? Mr. Wedderburn, do have some more turkey. A friend of mine, Mrs. Carruthers, who is a great believer in Mental Science ... Michael always laughs at me

ruthers. She lives near

You haven't time now to explain th

Because you'll be able to see th

dresses, mother,"

Merry Christmas, and do send a post card to Ste

more than ever romantic to be setting out to Spain, and all the way to Victoria Maurice tried to decide

d poplar trees and rolling fallows until dusk fell sadly on the flooded agriculture. Dawn broke as they were leaving behind them the illimitable Landes. Westward the Atlantic clouds swept in from the Bay of Biscay, parting momentarily to reveal rifts of milky turquoise sky. Wider and wider grew the rifts, and when the train passed close to the gr

en they reached Madrid and found that no bull-fights would be held before the spring, he began to mutter of Rome and was inclined to obliterate the Spaniards fro

atever destiny in art was in store for him. Here he would forget whatever blow life might hold in the future. He would send everybody he knew to Seville, notwithstanding Michael's objection that such generosity would recoil upon himself in his desire to possess somewhere on earth the opportunity of oblivion. Maurice and Wedderburn both bought Spanish cloaks and hats and went with easels to sit beside the Gua

and Wedderburn strove in vain to draw corner after corner of the cathedral, in the dust and shadows of whose more remote chantries Michael heard many Masses. A realization of the power of faith was stirred in him by these Masses that every day of every year were said without the recognition of humanity. These mumblings of ancient priests, these sanctus-bells that rattled like shaken ribs, these interminable and ceremonious shufflings were the outward express

sonal friendliness between himself and God. Here in Burgos he was absorbed into the divine purpose neither against his will nor his desire, since he was positively aware of the impotency of his individuality to determine anything in the presence of omnipotence. He told himself this sense of inclusion was a sign of the outpouring once more of the grace of God, but he wished with a half whimsical

It was intolerable. Michael, Wedderburn, and Maurice displayed their most polite obstructiveness, but in the end each of them found himself upright, stiff-backed and exasperated. Michael thought regretfully of Spain, and remembered those peasants who shared their crusts, those peasants with rank skins of wine and flopping turkeys, those peasants who wrought so inimitably their cigarettes and would sit on the floor of

, dear?" sh

lars that were in the o

nk so,

mething for a change,

nt. Maurice was turning over the pages of a comic paper. Wedderburn snored. It was difficult to achie

had looked forward to planning with her a journey back to Spain as soon as possible. His mother du

eir foreheads against the coffins! It's dreadful to think of. Do be careful, Michael. I have written a long letter to Stella explaining all the precautions she ought to take. Who knows what may happen in Germany? Such an impulsive nation. At least the Kaiser is. Don't laugh, my dea

mother with affec

ought you from Spain? Look, it's

laugh about sacred subjects.... I don't really see why we shoul

ll. He told himself guiltily in the hansom that it was more than a year since he had been to see old Viner, but the priest was so heartily

t I couldn't get away. Have you been to see Sandif

dignitaries. He had indeed heard Pallant preach at the church of the Cowley Fathers, b

promise," s

ink he does get hold of men by offering them

rugged his

to have made you very bigot

'come inside, you're really one of us.' I shan't invite every callow biologist to hear Mass just because a Cowley Dad sees nothing in the last article on spontaneous generation that need dismay the faithful. I'm ge

f was very toler

taken in adultery, tolerant to the people without wine at Cana, but h

to slam the door in the

n their company, because the modern man wants to re?dit spiritual truths just as he has been able to re?dit a few physical facts that apparently stand th

y, your faith seems to be resisting the batterings of

dinating my opinions and accepting Christianity as laid down by the Church. I should love to be a sort of Swedenborgian with all sorts of fanciful private beliefs. But I want to force everything within the convention. I hate Free Thought, Free Love, and Free Verse, and yet I hate almost equally the stuffy people who have never contemplated the poss

d your earnest young believers? What undergraduate paradox are you trying to wield against me? Remember, I've be

n from God. The psychologists have made miracles of that sort hardly worth while. But I'm hoping with all my might to see bit by bit everything fall away except faith. Perhaps when I b

er all," said Viner, "with your

urrender myself, and I'm not going to surrender anything until I am

same impression of shrill cockney, of boisterous familiarity, of self-satisfied election. To-morrow morning he would say Mass to the same sparse congregation of sacristan and sisters-of-mercy and devout old maids. The same red-wristed server would stump about his liturgical business in Viner's wake, and the same coffee pot put in the same place on the same table by the same landlady would await his return. There was a dreariness about the ministrations of this Notting Hill Mission wh

ton, and he was concerned to see that

you been solving thi

ig for Mods," said Alan hopeless

tively fingered his text-books, while he talked

chael. "And if you aren't determined to play cricket all the

loomily, "I've settled to be

occupied all his leisure. After Maurice and Wedderburn came back from Spain, they devoted much of their time to painting, and The Oxford Looking-Glass became a very expensive business on account of the reproduction of their drawings. Moreover, the circulation decreased in ratio

emed anxious to have a quiet talk with him in the library, but Michael made an excuse, not feeling inclined for self-revelation so quickly on top of six Klebe men and the eggs and bacon. He went to see Father Pallant at Cowley, but Father Pallant appeared so disappointed that he had brought him no scientific problems to reconcile with Catholic dogma, and was moreover so

ere he saw the same Keble men all singing conspicuously and all conveying the impression that every Sunday they occupied the same place. By the end of the term Michael's aroused interest in religion at Oxford died out. He disliked the sensation of belonging to a particular school of thought within a university. The ecclesiastical people were like

self-conscious, too congregational. As individuals, perhaps they were in tone with Oxford, but, eating bacon and eggs and talking about bishops, they belonged evidently to Keble, and Michael could not help feeling that Keble like Mansfield and Ruskin Hall was in Oxford, but not in the least of Oxford. The spirit of medi?val Oxford was more typically preserved in the ordinary life of the ordinary graduate; and y

n adherents of the theory, nor even indeed committing himself openly to Christianity as a general creed. Indeed, his whole attitude to religion was the result of a reactionary bias rather than of any impulse toward constructive progression. He would have liked to urge himself

ng the existence of ghosts: the essay clubs were still listening to papers that took them along the by-ways of arch?ology or sport. Throughout the university the old habit of mind persisted apparently. The New College manner that London journalists miscalled the Oxford manner still prevailed in the discussion of intellectual subjects. In Balliol when any remark trembled on the edge of a generalization, somebody in a corner would protest, "Oh, shut up, fish-face!" and the conversation at once veered sharply back to golf or scandal, while the intellectual kitten who had been playing with his mental tail would be suddenly conscious of himself or his d

r spirit which Michael could not account for

iggish and serious and rather

tirely on casual contributions," replied the edit

hat's a depressing thought. Do you really think these Rhodes Schol

. "But everybody seems keen

hy don't you threaten these pug-nosed invaders with

course I don't care one way or the other, but I don

editor," said Michael. "You're so es

rice, "ours is the only serious paper tha

distinguished. It shows the same tepid cordiality toward everything, from a man who's going to be hanged for murder to a new recor

," Maurice scof

d be to listen to him when he had finished his Telegraph. I feel rather like that about the O.L.G. But after all," he added cheerfully, "nobody does read the O.L.G. The circulation depends on the pledges of their pen sent r

there were any letters. Shadbolt handed him an invitation to dinner from th

n a row by old Pumpkin-head's butler. You. Me. Tommy Grainger. Fitzroy. That ass Appleby. That worm Car

aid Michael hopefully. "But if sh

emanded, "is this going to be

we may take it for granted as it will be mostly confined to members of the c

won't be

what,

lad

bsconds from such proceedings," said Shadbolt, drawing every word

lished must be added the names of Maurice, Wedderburn and two freshmen w

le, Wedderburn, and Grainger, bowed and starched, stood in Ven

o start round to the Warden's lodgings at ten past seven.

Venner?" ask

Venner. "The Warden knows how to give

enner?" ask

be sure you don't forget. It's a lovely wine. I wish we had a few dozen in the J.C.R. Now

" asked everybody,

were taking him back to his rooms, when he saw little Barnaby, a Science don, going across New quad. He broke away from his friends and shouted out, 'there's a blasted Boer,' and before they could stop him, he'd knocked poor little Barnaby, a most nervous f

e her brother, and nearly as round on a much smaller scale. They nodded to the Dean, mentally calculating how many roll-calls they were behind, for the Dean notwithstanding the geniality of his greeting had one gray eye that seemed unable to forget it belonged to the Dean. They nodded to Mr. Ardle, the Senior Tutor, who blinked

sit next the Pumpkinette?" whispered Lonsdale

hed Michael. "You will.

othing to fear for his own pre?minence. Modern life found in him a figure carved out of the persistent attributes of his office, and therefore already a symbol of the universal before his personality had been hallowed by death or had expressed itself in its ultimate form under the maturing touc

some of these transitory entertainments. He began to imagine himself with the commission to set on record the present occasion. He wished for the power to paint those deeper shadows in which the Warden's great round face inclined slowly now toward Fitzroy with his fair complexion and military rigor of bearing, now toward Wedderburn whose evening dress acquired from the dignity of its owner the richness of black velvet. More directly in the light of the first lamp sat Maurice and Appleby opposite to one another, both imparting to the assemblage a charming worldliness, Maurice by his loose-fronted shirt, Appleby by the self-esteem of his restless blue eyes. The two fresh

uired the Warden, shining full upon the editor in a steady ga

tor coughed remotely like a grasshopper: Lonsdale prodded Michael wi

rable amount of his leisure, but consoled himself for this by the fact t

t," said Maurice. Then boldly he demanded from the Warden what would be t

t interest," declared the Ward

ought the athletic qualifications were a mistake. "After all, sir, we don't want the Ta

carcely stigmatize Canadians as foreigners

dderburn, "when we come face to face with its practical expression.

nough to be able to be particular. I with increasing age be

old," whispered Miss Crackant

" Lonsdale murmu

hear what more he would say, Smithers seemed inclined to melt into silence, but wi

s Smithers curtailed undergraduate to the convention of a lady-novelist, a shudder ran round the dinner party.

," whispered Lonsdale. "Like

e able to ignore th

eveden wrote to me to say how deeply interested he was by the whole scheme-a most ap

ernor. Oh, rather. But I never knew him in those days." Then under his breath he

said Michael. "At least they will if Oxford hasn't lost anything lately. Sometimes I'm worried by that, and then I'

inished oversea products as b

arnestly. "Just as much b

of the Dean and laughed, while they laughed too and

Dean dryly. He spoke with that contempt of g

lius said what I'm trying to say much better than I ever can. Also they will gain a sense of humor, or rather they will ripen whatever sense they already possess. And they

d on their dons?" ch

y, "dons very often haven't much capacity for inquisi

t, my dear Fane, your optimism and your pess

mbers of the dinner party discussed the evenin

eories, why can't you wr

most indecently diaph

er. "But, I say, you are an

uld have burst, if I'd let out I didn't know what p

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