The Garden Without Walls

t. When my father had wakened and let me out of his arms to go upstairs and dress, she caught me into her bosom and half-smothered me, scoldin

h, the deceit of children for all they looks so h’innercent! And ’ere was your dear Pa a-tearin’ all the ’air out of ’is ’ead. And ’ere was me and John—we cou

rrupted, “and I shan’t like

u the truth; you was alway

e,” I said. “Everything’s just the same as when we left. We

did it?” And then she began to laugh and laugh. Her face grew red and again she fell upo

s wot ’appens to wimmen when they goes away with men. I wasn’t speakin’ of little boys a

said something to my father in French, shook me by the hand gravely, and led the way upstairs. We entered a room at the back of the house, overlooking the garden. A lady, almost as small as Ruthita, was lying on a couch with c

arm about my waist, smiling up at me. “So you are Dan

from noticing anything but her. It seemed as though all the eagerness of living, which other pe

she said; “you hav’n’t any money. But

ily. There was no sense of pleasure in doing what you were ordered to do just to amuse grown people. The

the couch. Monsieur Favart was looking out of the window, his h

played was gipsies in the forest. We gathered leaves and made a fire, pretending we were again in camp. I was G’liath;

ettie told me was all swank. It’s only true

can grow

it’ll ta

hands in her pi

loving till th

tement in being pushed into the open and told to go and play with Ruthita. It was all too easy. The fun had been in no one knowing that I did play with such a little girl—not even knowing that there was a Ruthita in the world. We tried to overcome this by always pretending that we were doing wrong when we

l take you from me, but your heart will never be theirs,” Lilith had said, and I tried to fancy that the rustli

t it there a little while for her to look at. I thought the sight of it would spur her on to more ambitious endeavors. But when I came back her beak was yellowy and the egg had vanished. After this unnatural act of cannibalism

e door in the wall. After that I watched. Nearly every night it happened. I was always too sleepy to stay awake to see at what hour he came back. But I knew that he did come back,

ght and tell Ruthita and myself stories. She used to try and get me to climb on her knee while she told them. I always refused, because my mother used to do th

at she wouldn’t hunt for me in my father’s study. I was a little awed myself at going there. I pushed open the door. The room was unlighted. I entered, and then halted at the sound of voices whispering. Standing in the window, silhouetted against the snow, were my father and Madam Favart. He was holding a sprig of misletoe over her; his arm was about h

e stories, and why she had wanted me to climb on her knee, and why she had tried to force me to make love to her. I rushed from the room and down the passage. Ruthita ran out laughing to catch me, but I pushed her aside roughly and unjustly. I wanted to get away by

by himself

you for not being sorry as He was with you for doing wrong. Hetty knew everything about God; she used to hold long conversations with Him every night in

t. I was to be stretching out long white hands, trying to quiet them; but their sense of guilt was to have placed them beyond all bounds of consolation. Every time I tried to comfort them they were to cry twice as hard. Then I saw my funeral and the big lily wreaths: “From his broken-hearted father”;

s holding Madam Favart’s hand. Ruthita was cuddled against my father’s shoulder; she was evidently reconciled rather more than stoically. I tapped on the pane. The old General saw me. He signed to the others to remain still. He threw up the window and

as a vicarious affair; Ruthita and I had taken the honeymoon, and our parents were married. If Uncle Obad hadn’t given

cognize her wants. We played a game of pretending. It had only one disadvantage, that it shut Ruthita out from our game, for one couldn’t court two ladies at once. I learnt to kiss Ruthita as

ome blacker, his hair whiter, and his scar more prominent. He could scarcely speak a word of English, so I never knew what he thought. But it seemed to me he was sor