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My Life as an Author

Chapter 5 ORDERS AND LINCOLN'S INN.

Word Count: 2960    |    Released on: 30/11/2017

ile at Albury, and Bulteel at Oxford, had been instruments of good to me, the first since I was 15, the other as a young collegian) and as Earl Rivers, whom my father had financially assisted promised

vicarage of my friend Mr. Evanson, who had agreed to license me to his curacy, in order that by reading the lessons in church I might practically test my competency. Of course, I prepared myself specially by diligence, and care, and prayer, to stand this new ordeal. But I failed to please even the indulgent vicar, though he got his curate for nothing, and though his fair daughter amiably welcomed the not ungainly C?lebs; and as for the severe old clerk,-he na?vely blurted out, "Tell'ee what, sir, it won't do: you looks well,-but what means them stops?" Alas! they meant the rebellion of tongue and lips aga

t yet be available to society and to myself, though on the "silent system:" but alas! verbal explanations are as necessary in a room as at the bar; I soon perceived that all could

in Chancery, and well known not only for his Law books, but also for his Life of St. Paul) where I used to dream and think and jot down Proverbial morsels on odd bits of

hilosophy commande

irit is lighter tha

idicule, first series, so I

tly assented; resolving however to be quite impartial. The result was that when I handed the critique to my busy friend, he quickly said after a hurried glance, "Why, this won't do at all; you have cut yourself up cruelly, instead of praising, as you ought to have done. I must do it myself, I supp

s own pocket-handkerchief garden to stray caterpillars and flies, &c., that came his way from among the packets of foreign plants. He used also to catch small fowl on passengers' coats and blank walls, as he passed on his daily walks to his office and back, having pill-boxes in his pocket, and pins inside his hat to secure the spoil. In the course of years he had amassed butterflies and beetles to so valuable an extent, that when he was compelled by adverse fortune to sell his cabinets by auction at Stevens's, he netted £1200 for his collection: this he told me in later years himself; immediately after the sale, he commenced collecting anew

turned the tide of execrations into cheers, and the Iron Duke passed me silently with a military salute: as the mob were thus easily converted ("mob" being, as we conveyancers say, a short form for "mobilé", changeable) and escorted our national hero to his home in safety, I really think the little incident worth recording. We are just now in the throes of such a mobocracy,-and know how much one firm policeman can avail to calm a riot. While speaking of the Duke and Apsley House, let me add here another word of

e, who, some time after, when we both had chambers in the Inn, wanted me (but I repudiated the idea) to be proposed as a candidate member for Oxford University, just before Gladstone was induced to stand; I daresay he will remember it. As to M.P.ship I may have had other chances, but I never cared for a position of endless care and toil by night and day, to say nothing of my impediment of speec

hological philosopher; Domville, since Sir Charles, I believe; and Gunn, a West Indian, of whom the jest was to inquire of Walters, a very nervous man, if h

hat Lady Spencer promised my father to get me an Indian Writership,-as also that previously I had once hopes of the Registrarship from Lord John Russell, afterwards given to

essary qualification "needs no demonstration." Aunt Fanny has strongly recommended me to think more seriously about it, and Mr. M'Neile has also given me his valuable opinion on the subject, that at least I must inquire what I am more fitted for, and not lightly put aside those opportunities which Providence places in my way. However, I would by no means be hurried in my choice either way: I must inquire what is the office of a writer; whether oratorical powers be not requisite, &c., for as yet I have a very vague and indefinite idea of

ieve me, my dear father

. Tu

ember 28th,

achieved, with Lewin's help, a voluminous will, and a marriage settlement, with some accessory deeds, procured for me by my mother's friend Mr. Hunt, through one Dangerfield, a solicitor. I have often felt anxious to know how far my conveyanci

ers, butchers, and confectioners with trays, and a number of servants wanting places. All these were crowding round No. 5, as ordered or advertised for by Mr. Tupper: of course soon explained away, and rejected, to a general indignation at the hoaxers. Now, as I had my suspicions, I sat unseen at the front drawing-room window, and watched: and as more than once I had noticed P. and his friends pass down the street on the opposite side, I taxed them with their exploit on the Monday; and I rather think it cost them not a trifling s

whereof Lord Sandwich, who had once lived there, is s

er to give her a dinner to-day"-sometimes even coming unannounced. She usually appeared all in white, even to her shoes and bonnet, which latter she would keep on the whole evening; the only colour about her being rouged cheeks, sometimes decorated with a piece of white paper cut into the shape of a heart, and stuck on "to charm away the tic." Well, her ladyship was always full of society anecdotes; and I only wish that her diary may soon be published, as probably a more spicy record of past celebrities than even Pepys's in old times, or Greville's in our own; but she is said to have left instructions to her executors not to publish till eve

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1 Chapter 1 PRELIMINARY.2 Chapter 2 INFANCY AND SCHOOLDAYS.3 Chapter 3 YOUNG AUTHORSHIP IN VERSE AND PROSE.4 Chapter 4 COLLEGE DAYS.5 Chapter 5 ORDERS AND LINCOLN'S INN.6 Chapter 6 STAMMERING AND CHESS.7 Chapter 7 PRIZE POEMS, ETC.8 Chapter 8 SUNDRY PROVIDENCES.9 Chapter 9 YET MORE ESCAPES.10 Chapter 10 FADS AND FANCIES.11 Chapter 11 SACRA POESIS AND GERALDINE. 12 Chapter 12 PROVERBIAL PHILOSOPHY.13 Chapter 13 A MODERN PYRAMID.14 Chapter 14 AN AUTHOR'S MIND PROBABILITIES.15 Chapter 15 THE CROCK OF GOLD, ETC.16 Chapter 16 SOP SMITH.17 Chapter 17 STEPHAN LANGTON—ALFRED.18 Chapter 18 SHAKESPEARE COMMEMORATION.19 Chapter 19 TRANSLATIONS AND PAMPHLETS.20 Chapter 20 PATERFAMILIAS, GUERNSEY, MONA.21 Chapter 21 NEVER GIVE UP, AND SOME OTHER BALLADS.22 Chapter 22 PROTESTANT BALLADS.23 Chapter 23 PLAYS.24 Chapter 24 ANTIQUARIANA.25 Chapter 25 HONOURS—INVENTIONS.26 Chapter 26 COURTLY AND MUSICAL.27 Chapter 27 F.R.S.28 Chapter 28 PERSONATION.29 Chapter 29 HOSPITALITIES—FARNHAM, ETC.30 Chapter 30 SOCIAL AND RURAL.31 Chapter 31 AMERICAN BALLADS.32 Chapter 32 AMERICAN VISITS.33 Chapter 33 SECOND AMERICAN VISIT.34 Chapter 34 ENGLISH AND SCOTCH READINGS.35 Chapter 35 ELECTRICS.36 Chapter 36 THE RIFLE A PATRIOTIC PROPHECY.37 Chapter 37 AUTOGRAPHS AND ADVERTISEMENTS.38 Chapter 38 KINDNESS TO ANIMALS.39 Chapter 39 ORKNEY AND SHETLAND.40 Chapter 40 LITERARY FRIENDS.41 Chapter 41 A FEW OLDER FRIENDSHIPS.42 Chapter 42 POLITICAL.43 Chapter 43 A CURE FOR IRELAND.44 Chapter 44 SOME SPIRITUALISTIC REMINISCENCES.45 Chapter 45 FICKLE FORTUNE.46 Chapter 46 DE BEAUVOIR CHANCERY SUIT AND BELGRAVIA.47 Chapter 47 FLYING.48 Chapter 48 LUTHER.49 Chapter 49 FINAL.