His Forbidden Confession

las p

rmon for morning mass, I thought about her as I ran the Bible study, as I prayed my nightly prayers...and as I breathe in

hat throaty melodic voice...that night, som

le...or that I wasn't surprised when I felt that way, as if I'd already known what had been going on between us...it's been goi

announced them husband and wife when I noticed Xenia. She was sitting alone in the farthest corner of that h

ld. However, it's not their fault either as their parents died serving the king or fighting in the war king started. So

onversation led to another and I didn't know how... but we started talking about marriage and she blurted out that she wanted to marry me. And I

e, I felt satisfied, thinking that I did good being a father. The thing I didn't notice at that time was, that Xenia wasn't a child

es...that burning body of Samara, instead, I slept with a smile on my face, thinking about

isfying herself, moaning my name...yes, I did hear that, she wasn't quite enough. And after heeding my name, from her breathless voice, all I could do was run away to the r

rpse since taking the robe-

versial inhabitant of the priesthood these last few years, but I still abide carefully by them. Especially because of my past and what had happened to Samara. I swore to myself, that

e week, I firmly and deliberately tamped down the memory of her

n today, so I thought perhaps I could go and visit Father Alexander, he was my confessor before and God knows I needed to confess. I needed to let

olas. I ord

roat, "I, uh. I wanted t

o ordinary woman, it was Xenia. Her voice was low

myself. My voice came harsher than I inten

ed and it made me stop for a second. I wasn't refusing her, was I? It's j

istinguished to frighten young women by telling them about carnal sins. Sister Lagertha could be quite intimidating sometimes as several times I'd spend hours listening to the confession about sinf

entler, " You will feel more comfortable talk

ghing on me...the things I had been thinking, and doing with

ask Sister Mary, you already know h

ng, short and deep like

she said. "Thank you for s

ue from the box, and my eyes could catch only the faintest suggestions of mov

wanted to hear her whisper those things in her breathy voice, I

nted to t

ve years. And she is Xenia for god sake...Xenia to whom I raised

er earlier words. " And no need to tro

door to the booth swun

sighed, twelve years of experience in priesthood and reconciliation made me immune to all kinds of sinful confessions...Man or women, I could counsel without being apprehensive about their sexua

a parishioner who was in the same situation. What I would offer as m

ncerely. Ask for forgiveness and the

urself from the tempt