The Biker's Rules

5 Sep

years af

rn, am 19 years old. Ninetee

ancisco (Uncle

The San Francisco Boys -

- Me

the eyes. O

y have

like summer apples covered in dew. Eyes with

ing slowly he kisses his way up her thigh, turning his head so his breath

through that silky raven-bl

nder her hips pulling her into his face. She lets out a cry of plea

n time it's the same. I can't even read a trashy book

ch that forms between them as I throw the stupid b

"Stop reading yourself into a climax!" A pai

uts excitedly, pulling clothes from the shelves and throwing them on the

me. I will wear anything I like without cons

ks at me, her eye

ng about HIM again." She picks up th

snotty tone, knowing

orld so you can get him out of your system," she cha

a and I have been backpacking througho

with my Donald Ducked life. So we traveled from one holiday home - belonging to one

needed to get

ossible. Even Uncle John and Axel joined us thrice - f

not

im face-to-face again for the

I want to do with my life - but that's my own stupidity, and I'm

mind again," Kiara continues her charade. I

ap

wrong. He's been haun

him out of my system ... I

again with her war-face expr

.. or even hate, for that matter. She dates good-looking blokes mostly for sex. A mod

al, the sort of storybook love where two people's eyes meet and BAM - true love forever. Like a Romeo and Jul

Romeo leaves poor Juliet in the tomb to go fuck a slutty brunette on the side. And as if that's not

uld it give me those eyes meet - BAM - part, just to let fate interv

e. No wonder people are getting more and more skeptical to risk their h

ld, fate set me up to have my BAM moment with HIM

ents. With t

really, real

they w

icked off young) and our principal decided to introduce us to cross-country running. The whole school was to

hell guards the place - ripping anyone who da

tually died in

... and my bro

ay and investigate the house. Anybody who chickened out would have been labeled a namby-pamby ... and knowing Jason ... he would

t hurt, grounded, and ended up in detention - with Axel. Jason and the runaways never

osedived and sank sensationally in my freshman year - but the

ed house ordeal - Axel became a very important part

ghtly when I'm in

trust a handf

untry was no

first BAM moment w

tarting at Harvard-Westlake. I was annoyed because I landed in the princi

r's head and gave Jason a perfect shiner, but

hut and turned around, ready to share my beef and wail about the unfairness of the s

pple eyes. The hot-as-hell eight-grader standing next to my brother filled out his uniform better than Tho

Same eyes. Same boy.

- the true storybook meet-cute at t

ncreased heartbeat, the butterflies, the swe

same boy who helped Kiara out of the hole at the haunted house and the same boy who gave me his jacke

n to hate. And I me

s; your heart rate increases way over the limit of normal; you get drunk and high on ad

upboard?" Kiara flings something aga

years. Running down the right sleeve is a green M with the words 'Monster Energy', while the Reaper skull with w

tuff it into my bag. T

in. I did learn my le

of clothing

can come back for the rest anytime I want. It's not as if we're m

one we only lived in for a month or so, before Mom was

y burnt down to ashes onl

g, the inves

property - one for each kid. It's ideal ... we all stay together but sepa

cided to study art ... for now. And then I'll see where life leads me. I'll probably keep on freelanci

, the grammar sucks - a bunch of crap, really. And the couple on the cover is so cliché. The whole stereotypical

going to be h

. That's the who

t I feel sick whenever he's aro

ensity each year. It's getting almost unbearable - so much that I'm scared of doing somethi

t. Don't judge -

duces feelings of euphoria and pleasure. It's why hate can feel so thrilling and, at times, even addictive, and why you can't stop thinking about the hated person. The pro

me, tapping her foot impatie

into a serious pout.

trick to dealing with Kiara is a solid diversion. Howe

r for-real bo

o's ever actually asked me out." I pout at Kiara, who look

says gently. "You'

ghosted me freshman year? I

in that stupid coffee shop

ra says, folding one of my shirts with u

ndly the next day. Wouldn't look me

use. "The guy looked like he

y, "maybe that's wh

d to work past it. Instead, he act

arly did die

started that any guy who dated me would suffer unbearable pain. And just like that, the

owns. "

anyone bother ruining

o," sh

e they didn't start the rumor - and my brothers don't lie.

ways suspected

s. "Of cour

on her hairy chin, mousy-brown locks like a dirty wet mop, and she was big ...

t believe she had a prom date," I

"Men are adapta

gory. They'd sit near me at lunch. Talk to me. Joke with me. But never get close. Spin-the-bottle skipped me. D

Or rather, my brothers assig

ead. "Whatever. It do

look

say. "And he's survive

"No injuries. No mysterio

count for

mply feelings. This is more ... strategic loneliness

he middle of my brain - the one responsible for chaos, obsession, and questionable life choices

th

lat emotional line, like my

a five-mile radius. Like it's hardwired to that asshole. Like someone misfiled a wi

xist, they're clearly hiding inside cheap stuffing and button eyes. My thumb traces the tiny red heart embroidered on the

Kiara says coolly, "why do you

up. "It is N

ises a

er of the evil lurking beneath his stupid, pretty-boy exteri

eyes narrow. "Then why does Pan smell e

ree

itorously

low. Sh

Sport.

use of him - obviously - but because it is, objectively, one of the greatest smells ever created by mankind. Fres

in a way that feels unfair. S

y face, breathing hi

fensively, shoving the turtle tow

s. Then exhales a

olling her eyes, "

tighter. Yea

en how he treated

as something sharp stabs

rgotten. I don't

self into you. Especially i

arms, swinging the poor turtle back

king me lightly on the head with the

rshal a defense

our hand. Took you out. And then - surprise-

cause she's

ent ... and somehow it turned into the perfect night - rides and laughter, sticky fingers from ice cream, his hand warm and

made it hu

runette at school as if none of it had

bad-boy disaster, like all the dysfunctional guys in o

I didn't learn it the first time ... it took an

oesn't kn

- dramatically, stupidly, under the cover of night - and dragged me to the zoo. I rem

scued us from the ha

h fi

ant. Like a c

tigers and the crocodiles, I lost my teenage heart. And fell

ld tell anyone - he showed up the next day with a black eye, a new girl on his a

y much

. And without a word, me and him ..

t my brothers committing murder. Damion probably did it becaus

tely. And with every tear, the hur

say I hate him.

speak only when forced to, and even

very opportunity. And he's very, very good at it. He can p

so ... get me from dry to

mical. Stupid. Unfair. And entirely se

tty brunette, the resentment digs in deep

say, "But have you noticed h

gingers, Ilkay likes dark hair, so does Axel, Logan prefers blo

wrong. Dysfunctio

stick with Ren," I

afe. Good. He

no sparks. Not

talking about mar

do I know about babies ... won't even know which side of it is up or

ng a future with minivans and

I want to sleep with him. Defi

husiasm and orgasms because it's just ... blah. She

my first tim

iara says. "The curse is bro

y own stupid hypothalamus chemistry malfunctioning. That I

lse, his frickin green eyes pop

se my mind, body, and heart are locked in a three-w

arning me to stay miles

r - lusting for his

or thing just wants to

e wors

n't know whic