Love Among the Chickens
fe is flowing smoothly, arethe novels they write in that period of content coloured withoptimism? And if things
inenthave the power of detaching their writing self from their living,work-a-day self; but, for my own part, the frame of mind in which Inow found myself had a disastrous effect on my novel that was to be. I
hemselves into the schemeof it. A magnificent
ke a resolute effort to
as borne inupon me. Day and night I spurred my brain to t
furiously on thelinks, and swam about the harbour whe
tar, and cameout an unspeakable object. Ukridge put his spare pair of tennis shoesin the incubator to dry them, and permanently spoiled the future ofhalf-a-dozen eggs which happened to have got t
ces, however, his buoyant op
morning asking when my firstconsignment was going to arrive. You know, these people make a mistakein hurrying a man. It annoys him. It irritates him. When we really getgoing, Garny, my boy, I shall drop Whiteley's. I shall cut them out ofmy list and send my eggs to their trade rivals. They shall have asharp lesson. It's a little hard. Here am I, worked to death lookingafter things down here, and these men have the impertinence to botherme abo
to see the most astounding thi
e chickens. There was certainly something the matterwith them. They were yawning--broadly, as if we bored
ed. "Because if so,that's what they've got. I never saw a more bored-looking
be the matter with it?""I tell you what we'll do," said Ukridge. "We'll ask Beale.
d through the bushes, carrying aboot. We seemed t
er with thesechickens?"The Hired Retainer examined
?" said
s these 'ere fowlshave been and got the roop."I had
s them yawn like tha
m.""And have they all got it?""Yes, ma'
gave themsnuff.""Give them snuff, she did," he repeated,
eyes bubbled."Mrs. Ukridge uttered a faint
cure them?"
sponded the exp
and clean your beastl
im what hedoes when his fowls get the roop.""Yes, sir.""No, I'll go, Ukridge," I said. "I want some exercise."I whistled to Bob, who was investigating a mole-heap in the paddock,and set off in the
At intervals itpasses over a stream by means of a foot
st of these brid
omebody coming through the grass, but nottill I was on the bridge did I see who it was. We reached t
one on the footbridge, and
first sign of recognition,I said nothing. I me
said to myself. She answeredthe unspoken
d, stopping at the end
e English language. At a crisis when I would havegiven a month's income to have said something neat, epigrammatic,suggestive, yet withal courteous and re
ds.""Yes," I said gloomily, "I suppose so.""So you must not think
en I amwith my father. You will understand?""I shall understand.
ee," I
ched her out of sight, and we
was verbose andreminiscent. He took me over his farm, pointing out as we wentDorkings with pasts, and Cochin
ed at, and one which Iproposed to leave exclusively to Ukridge and the Hired Retainer--andalso a slight headache. A vi
there was deep water o
companion was a gigantic boatman, by name Harry Hawk, possibly adescendant of the gentleman of that name who went to Widdicombe Fairwith
Itwas an instructive sight, an object-lesson to those who hold that
f he were at all likely to c
ing with a straw, my mindranged idly over large subjects and small. I thought of love andchicken-farming. I mused on the immortality of the soul and thedeplorable speed at which two
if he werevery hot. I tried to picture his boyhood. I spec
hen amovement on the part of that oarsman set the boat rocking,
progressed rapidly. I i
uld not happen in real life. In my hot youth I once hadseven stories in seven weekly penny papers in the same month, alldealing with a situation of the kind. Only the details differed. In"Not really a Coward" Vincent Devereux had rescued the earl's daughterfrom a fire, wherea
eat idea surged into my brain. At four minutes totwelve I had been grumbling impotently at Pro
therefore, cease any connection with it, and start a rivalbusiness on my ow
of its own accord, I would arrange one for myself. Hawk looked to methe
which subsequently appeared in the /Recording Angel/:--* * * * */Thre
nce came to the scratch
alluding to thewarmth of the weather and the fact that the professor habituallyenjoyed a bathe every day. Much sparring, Consc
llis say if she knew?" Garnet, however, side-stepped cleverly with "But she won't know," and followed up theadvantage with a damaging, "Besides, it's all for
that the round would be a briefone. This proved to be the case. Early in the second minute Garnetcross-co
ose, feeling m
wed Mr. Hawk in the bar-par
time you take Professor Derrick outfishing"--here I glanced round, to make sure that we were n
I do that fo
" said I, "but I am prepar
ed his po
pt on g
ed with
concise. Mychoice of words was superb. I crystallised my id
actical joke. He gave me to understand that this was the typeof humour which was to be expected from a gentleman from London. I amafraid he must
uld not give my true reason,
at he, too, would get wet when theaccident took
t is dying out of our rural districts. Twenty years ago afisherman woul