Pain of Love

articularly high-end, reminiscent of a fragranc

cheap perfume, instead being s

it was a wo

ume, so its presence at home

least, they

ve friction leaving it bl

with a strange itch, the kind of i

om my eyes, and the sudden light m

pping my face. "Why

ze, his face wou

too bright, it

that

the chandelier with a cl

t intensifying with our mingli

upposed to

you dis

d pulled away. He grasped my wri

my white dress, my watery eyes well

t to g

ut

ain was fastened ag

as an answer. As expected, Richard shoved m

. You can only have me

ite dress, reduc

vated by his fre

ld stroke my cheek and tell me

, no one else

tended to be pure

you be m

1

the most upscale restaurant in Arkl

lan would have made

atch a whiff of the natural, youthful scent he carried-like fr

h you could get lost in,

ike him had f

everything in it. I wou

The moment I saw him,

y people, yea

button, his cuffs neatly fastened, an

trands rebelliously hanging over his forehead, givi

ontrasting features came toget

sed foreheads and gold-rimmed glas

a slightly sinister appearance, with a

hade, making me wonder what kind of expression h

him that I momentaril

stead, he nervously clasped his

uld you be m

o be flustered, and let my eye

already like

edulous. "How? I've neve

to be in love. "We just confir

nally offering a bitter smi

back. "Th

stood up, carrying my

on his laptop, seemi

ne on him, apologetically

mall smile, his gaze gentle. H

er there. Why come all thi

en watchi

citement, like a parched traveler in th

want to meet you. But I was afraid you wouldn't r

.." Richard chuckled, glancing

ming for

ed. " I

eres

g I didn't have a meeting today,

art of the guilty girl who h

uy you a new suit, could

stared at me for a long moment before flash

ur

chard wore, but that didn't matter. W

re his suit came from. I made a mental note to study

's wr

ncerity, told him, "I'm sorry, Mr. Wade,

ised. "How do you kno

ver calling you that

ly emphasizing the

. W

rig

steering wheel and casually

len

e your name, I'll

me. "I'm no

live? I'll dr

ay Resi

if in passing, "That bo

ust a

ainst the car window and teased, "

rey, weeding out the ones that didn't meet h

leman, hiding all his sharp edges, waiting for th

to him, showing my QR code. "Bett

ckled. "You

are you,

out my

nty-

Richard drove off, disappe

me. I tossed and turned, waiting for a message from R

el

s so formal!" I r

e minutes before h

e a bit too e

still young. You'r

esponse, leaving me unsure if

pause, his messag

o you wa

y liked girls who were easy to control,

ped thr

usement

, you can mistake it for love. But I k

2

rrived be

with a few stubborn strands sticking up here and there. Paired with his c

sses, and his pale skin, untouched by s

ound before steppi

d one to him. He looked at it, su

swe

nk of it as my apol

n and took a bite from the

er of his mouth, and with a quick flic

s turn a deeper shade of

e, and his mouth had a visible wa

would feel against skin-hot enoug

gh, handed him the ice cream, and

almost as if I were waiting for

e didn't grab my hand. Instead, he gently ruffled

lume ride?" he asked, ti

do you wa

roller coaster. I

been to an amusement par

ea

darkening for a moment.

smile on his face but with an

heated

if he were studying a fragile creature, ready to see

mm

f she could turn back time, she'd definitely reg

ling my eyes. "You really are impre

o had been thoroughly dismissed by an ex, and whose obsession was with the

d lifted, and he patted my shoulder. "Com

he was when he'd put the chains on me, he was ju

nd made sure the safety measures were in place. He even looked

ea

d he sit next to me,

always made people instinctively re

ched Richard's hand, it didn

r coasters. Apart from his hair getting a bit messed up, he remained

to steady myself as we left our seats. I was still shaken,

e, looked a bit amused, a

of water and waited fo

u were braver

out

ou were the

ling better. My gaze then shifted to the giant s

rm, rushing to join the

nce. On the contrary, he followed m

By the end, I was naturally clinging to Richard's arm, and he,

y?" he

m craving spi

ka

r, the motion as effortless as i

he effortlessly navigated his car to the food street

eeted him with a bright, sunflower-like smile. "Oh

d picture a shy student in school uniform, br

been hi

ze to me, her smile growing even

t y

n harder. "Well, she will be! Let m

, he'd always pick up and

when Richard gently cut

I forget? Sit tight,

ustle around the kitchen,

s, staring at Richard, my e

t every time he did, I lowered my he

wrong?"

that good to yo

eyes and staring at the wall deco

reached out and lightl

er had a

own each other

Distance doesn't matte

sly, holding my gaze f

his arms and tapping the table with half-closed e

er just two days, do you really think t

rward slightly, bringing myself level with him so

her or not you'll let

moment before he reached out with his beau

e you're serio

3

had predicted. No matter how late or how busy he

I saw him, I had to run to his car, o

rehead, and turn his attention back to the steering wheel

en I used to run to him eagerly, it felt natural. But after the honeymoon phase, normal girls would

ed to know just how much

he came to pick

is head, clearly

a brief pause, he glanced at

g smile before he turned his e

ut with

. "Is th

cour

ore, opening the car d

ruffled my hair, and told me to h

got home late, warning that it wasn't

a's friend, which makes you my friend

ssiveness. His usual need for contr

nd Madelynn

friend is

's like one of those CEOs from the romance

e a ban

into my bag and playfully ta

went shopping, and Madelynn dragge

lled a familiar driver to ta

ed. I opened the door and could jus

a, holding the remote. With a

for me?

lways going to bed at exactly 10 PM. In all the

ed. But it wasn't the panda-patterned pajamas he wore that gave

you let me p

, making me instinctively move ba

ting near my ear, his knee on t

nt to distur

ng his expression, trying to

cted. He lowered his he

afraid of? I was jus

is phone, and displayed my enti

Then, you went to the movies. After that, y

are a foodi

xpression, Richard's

Go take two, or you'll be bloated tomo

bath ready.

re enough, Richard's location hadn't moved since he'd le

sively monitoring my every move, anxiously waiting

thought. Now, love

d his arm around my waist and snuggled into the

a lot of frie

lly, jus

to face him so ou

I haven't met any

d my che

ether it's friends or pa

lly nibbled on my ear, making it

lying!"

ard didn

, his voice dripping with a dangerous seduction-like th

? Will you only lov

back, losing myself in t

4

ought me

I couldn't clearly see the diamond itself-just a fractured

neck, Richard rested his chin on my shou

ve you t

of my lips. With that, he subtly creat

ke my designer handbag in awe. "Wow, th

started talking to me-some from wea

crowd and honk the horn, drawing everyone's attentio

bringing me to formal events and introducing me to heirs a

cene, and I didn't disappoint him. I showed great interest in ev

and say, "Daniela, you're so bea

ondering when it would end-because I wasn't s

d came sooner t

wearing a strapless black dress

my ankle, so every step I took was

ll wasn't a

, there was an undercurrent of pettiness.

wd, champagne in hand. He was all charm and politeness, chattin

date, Jolene" rather tha

received a call. Something urgent had

ve

ing my forehead be

groups I usually hung out with, they barely acknowledged me, their expressions indiffe

here alone, because soon after, a boy came up

and said, "I'm

tone mocking and

for him to change w

ing all his time with tha

st've turned pale. And I near

e me

ballroom and sat on a

iped by the fountain. I wante

liking some girl from the countryside. Even if he

's a Cinderella story, gr

Richard, I wouldn'

esperate she was to hang ou

acts like she's a rich wife. Th

rd getting really close

amous university. She'

ed to her, Amay

ous, go apply to it.

dy all the time

st rich kids he

ught a bunch of Serenity Jade from Ut

Jade from

ur mom got

h a few tears in my eyes, I le

ul when I got home, tears streaming d

o his arms, cru

st your

ying not to laugh. He gently cupped my face and whisper

ng. "Of course, you're ha

yside. No wonder they say I'm a nob

ew serious. He looked into my eyes

ell me, I'll tea

all sa

m all le

s, making me just want to snuggle in his arms, to pou

don't want to go to

rig

your relationship wit

even have to be j

ng a child, "I'll fire her tomorrow, an

d in re

he school's elite, and due to my sarcastic comments, the rumor that I

ieved his objective, a

you want to s

d sugg

sin, I had dreamed of studying abroad. I dreamed of a day when I'd step over ev

, I had to give him that much

have to s

d dismissively rejected Madelynn whe

abroad next year. As her frie

ly at me, pulling me aside,

ryone at school i

're someone'

s wife, not

they want. You ca

re but to school and with him. You have t

ld that

gainst the door with an air of calm ce

rejected

portunity. I want to give it m

social connections at school

rd was ve

ht. You jus

5

ll from Richard

ho used to sit on the back of

se bright eyes and dimpled

Richard must have loved he

and me in the top drawer. Their pho

n, the c

ncroaching deep,

ely able to speak. She m

ou Dan

who is

ther end rose, "Sta

a p

st lea

ha

are

er trying to c

lfriend. Remember my

e to le

hed the phone from me. His eyebrows r

had waited years for revenge

have you

piercing sound that sen

aw

e a l

ever want to

ing was desperate, l

his wet hair dripping water onto hi

he was angry with m

g down stubbornly, my movements rough

aback. He graspe

nie

aced him, my ey

me, but you can'

like this,

"You know I li

't I

ay for you, besides school I wouldn't go anywhere,

, and look at them from time to t

of it,

re, I want to live like I used

e. As you turned to a new god

you to have an epiphany,

who was your light, and wh

serve your affection anymore. What

s time I didn't push him away

inking a

rong. From now on, my world

ldn't see, I curled

ll had to cut off my last t

oaching, I took Richar

this so-c

pigweed in the fie

ching my legs until bl

brother's head lovingly, feeding him rice po

sidelines, my toes curle

my hair, bash my head against the

to quickly finish my home

I hadn't done enough chores or hadn't

too poor and to

ll yearne

veryone, my parents, my

e, I'd give them everything I c

ndness neve

icious, pushing me

me a whore, noting how

ime I hit him back

brother in the pigpen, watching as the pi

the rush of exhilaration surging through me. I crouched o

ient when they saw me. A few claps of my hands, and th

n't hurt, just terrified, and the smell of

ked him in the kitchen and took a sha

look like accidental scrap

up among the fir

head and whi

ou bl

spect your

aying those hu

nd I watched as he shivered from t

was disobedient, and disobedi

stakes would he truly respec

ng to tell M

anything!" he promised, hi

down the tile and fetched warm

y brother shared the cookies our

ished do children

listen to me. I really

e was so forced, so fake, wi

ded someone who would truly put m

n I went to university, I'd bring them

ady spread the lie that I

o hear the same, so they wou

the way for

to cage is eagerly

using to feed the chickens, startled. But he quickly

t you tell me you were comin

your boy

t call him

his fawning expression unclear whet

luggage and in

g goods. Please, have a se

te floor blotched in places. The air smelled of mildew. Richard fr

s a clean freak, so I had made s

nd instinctively placed his hand on

er. They came away sticky w

two old, stained glass cups we had in the house

r, nothing like the high-en

ousehold, tea leaves were a luxury, and su

o in front of our father-nervous and scared, h

e tea. He would never d

pulled a thick pale of money from hi

e-something I hadn't seen in years. But he qu

nk y

ent I saw you, I knew you weren't like us. You'r

. It's our tradition to have sweet tea for the new ye

and shifted his attenti

ppiness w

e, with m

old together, wi

d pleased. Pleased enough to

r, glancing at me and then a

guess I'll h

tation as he picked up the cup and downed it in one

," he said

ck, arching

ncerned about him disliking the te

other to make me sugar water when we were kids

ned from the market, looking a

the shopkeepers as if they were respon

d incessantly, spitti

k from the sun, and dry like straw, ma

surprise. He took my han

l take you aw

e better fr

r and gave him

waist, clearly thinking he h

ith parents like mine, would be too easy to

ght. With no friends and no tie

tall frame creating

ed, began to curse

ou, and what are yo

ped out from b

D

o

my boy

" Richa

shut up and took a

ey were inspecting a piece of meat at the market. They didn't go as far

. He knew how to handle peopl

ettes, offering one to my d

heap, pack cigarettes, took a deep

d st

bad, kid. C

ts for you both. The

o boxes from the trunk-cigaret

ts. She was over the moon, while my da

hand, barely contai

, you've hit

d, your mom, and your brot

ild a new house for your br

and nodded. "Do

actually come back was

ed Richard's work a

, I knew if we stayed too long, I wouldn't be

e late-night traffic was sparse.

ve had a tough life

t the window and shedding a few tears. R

t you have me, no one

I had to do was follow along, feed his nee

o return, waiting for him to cook, for his kiss on my for

take me out, but never

sometimes I wish I could keep you close a

ed the ice cream off

sw

dn't shown up. We'd have delicious food and drinks,

rticularly swelte

Richard reminded me to st

t, with anxiety and fear that

ht seemed to d

ssure him, "I de

aynie s

irt and jeans, her hair pulled up into a h

e not

g for R

ere. You'r

es

rabbing my hand and

s already

stily closing the door, and urg

ne, r

essness ambiguous, from

stay away fro

the office and was heading home, but o

mplored, "Don't be naive, Jolene

a downpour, rushing back into

halfway, leaving me d

a small puddle quick

ade me shiver

the sofa, the lights

anaged a small smile

e sofa, holding my face, with a mix of te

find you and lock you in the house. Bu

a, I've had a c

ilver chain clasp

er leave me a

issing away the t

ht you'd come