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Across the Plains, with Other Memories and Essays

Chapter 10 No.10

Word Count: 8328    |    Released on: 01/12/2017

s room in case he wanted to sit up and write; but sometimes William forgot, or, at any rate, did not obey, and Archie wondered if the man did it on purpose, with perhaps the same excellent intenti

tching of sentences that bit into the plate, still pos

hy he could not link up his thoughts to his power of expression. He was nearly at the end of one of those sea-stories, which he had begun at Silorno, and he knew exactly what he meant to say.

had not drunk too little, and left the bitter weeds o

would be like her consistency to take that also, and leave him nude and empty. It was not that she wanted the gift which she-in his vague, excited thought-seemed to be robbing him of; it was only that she and the memory of how she had treated him was a vampire to his blood. She had sucked him empty, drained him dry of happ

t of Helena, he could never get that abstraction and detachment which he knew were the necessary conditions of his writing. And all power of achieving that se

n their courses, driven onwards by the inexhaustible eternity of creative forces that ran through the stars, even as it ran through the humblest herb that put forth its unnoticed blossom on the wayside. But Archie, in this bitter stagnation that paralysed him, seemed to himself to have no part in life: all that current of ene

r, and idea flashed across the blank field of his brain. Perhaps there might still be some spark of life, of individuality latent without him, which he could reach by that surrender of his conscious self which had been familiar to him in his childhood. There, just

of shadow, but appearing again. Upwards and upwards moved the waves, and then it seemed that it was they which were stationary, while he himself was sinking down through them, as through crystal-clear waters, looking up at the sunny surface which rose ever higher and more remote above him. As he sank into this dim, delic

faintly familiar near him that said "I am coming." But he was far too intent on his progress to let the interruption break in upon it, and indeed those sounds seemed to be less an interruption than a confirmation to his surface-senses of what was happening to him... And then he knew, as he sank down to

*

r of his table. And by it, very faint and unfocusable, part of it in the mists of the subconscious world, part in the harder outlines of reality, there was standing the figure of a young man. How it was dressed he could not see, or did not care to notice, but when for a moment the mist cleared off its face, he recognized the strong likeness to himself, even as he had recognized the liken

use you were in such trouble, and because you didn't

planation fl

"The white statue of

the white statue. You loathed what came out of it, just

into the mist that at this mo

o, Martin," he crie

ist came the

looks like," it said.

e whole thing makes

er and the tray with syphon and

flooded with light. I can't see the darkness which you feel is so impenetrable: I only see you walking towards the ineffable radiance, always moving towards it. Occupy your

ce sank

g," it said. "I am l

artin, stop with me. Talk to me

again he felt, perfectly clearly, the touch of fingers that pressed his. But they d

ar Archie," it said. "

*

e had been looking withdrew on to the surface of his cigarette-case, and slowly the whole room emerged into its normal appearance. Archie became suddenly conscious of a profound physical fatigue, and, leaving all though

s own mind. It came from without and entered into him, and, unlike most of the communications that purported to reach the minds of sensitives from the world that lay beyond the perception of their normal senses, there was guidance and help in it. Often, if not invariably, these messages from beyond were trivial and nugatory; it was a just criticism to say that the senders of them did not appear possessed of much worth the trouble of sending. But Martin's visit had not been concerned with trifles like that: he had sympathized, as a brother might, with Archie's trouble; he had explained, so that Archie could not longer doubt, the manner of the warning he had received before but not understood; he had spoken of Archie as being wrapped, according to his own sensations, in impenetrable darkness, though, to one who looked from beyond, he was ever moving towards the ineffable radiance. It was the same discarnate intelligence that, when he was a child, had conveyed to him the knowledge of that cache under the pine

mself denuded of all that he had loved, empty, and cast out from life i

after a prolonged sitting, he felt kindly and affectionate. But this was not from the sottish satisfaction of wine: the light came from that subtle window in his

er. "Good morning, Jessie. How bright and early we

e room was next his. "I heard you hammering at something after I ha

le helping himself to s

at for the present, an

bout the return of Marti

tly when

hacked it open. About talking-yes, I was writing last night, and I believe I read it aloud

t aloud to me,

ite in order when I read it over.

case; it had been like sharp blows on wood, and for a moment she had thought that Archie was tapping loudly on the door that separated their rooms. It had

he had given this explanation, and m

her a wedding present. And I shall come to her wedding. That will convey m

w, while to Jessie, only last night, he had loaded her with the bitterest reproaches, and had spoken of the abject despair and emptiness which had come up

to you, mother, but Jessie knows. I want her to try to forget what, for instance, I said to her last night. I can do better than that, and at any rate I propose to try.

*

at it had been he down by the lake last night. Savage and bitter as he had been there, he was authentic; now, all that he said, despite the absolute naturalness of his manner, seemed to ring false. She could not account for this impression in the least. It w

artin no darkness at all, but a flood of light from the ineffable radiance. It was in the glow of that revelation that he had spoken at breakfast, trusting in the truth of it, and yet, as he sat now, waiting for his father, he knew he did not feel the truth of it. But, in obedience to Martin, that was how he had to behave. He must behave like that-this was what Martin meant-until he felt the soul within him grow up, like some cellar-sown plant, into the light. Hopefully and bravely had he announced his intention, but now, when in cooler mood he scrutinized it, he began to feel how tremendous was the task set him, how firmly rooted was that passionate

Silorno, and he wondered whether the suggestion of a cousinly kiss would disturb her. What had kept him back was the knowledge that it would not be quite a cousinly kiss on his part... Then there was the moment when he had caught sight of her on the platform at Charing Cross: she had come to meet his train on his arrival from abroad... Best of all, perhaps, for there his passion had most been fed with the fuel of her touch, had been the dance at his aunt's that same night,

d shaky, and, as lunch-time was approachin

, for a few feet of earth will be all I shall require. But, before I went to bed, I came to the conclusion that I was wrong to worry. I think the scare will soon pass, and the shares recover. Indeed, I think the w

l with a shaking hand, and

to have a talk about something this morning. What was it? Tha

together with a strong cocktail in order to discuss the virtues of temperance, and make the necessary resolutions whereby to acquire them. He fel

od resolutions not to dri

hed his cocktail an

Your grandfather gave me a warning, and I wish to God I had taken it. But

not," said Archie. "As you remarked last night,

ntagel

it since," he said. "You found no difficul

likely to take any but the most bitter and savage view of a situation. But all morning he had been possessed by the sunny lightness of heart with which Martin's communication of last night had inspired him. He must be patient, disperse and blow away by the great winds of love the hatred and intolerance that had been obscuring his soul. And surely it was not only for Helena that he must feel that nobler impulse: all that touched his daily life must be treated with the same manly tenderness. Nothing must shock him, nothing must irritate him, for

whiskies in the evening were to be closed from henceforth. And the arrangement entered into appeared to be of a quality that sacrificed the desire of each for the sake of the other, or so at least it passed in their minds. Archie stifled the snigger of his inward laughter, and thought how clear was his duty to save his father, even at this late day, from

onic mockery that all the time had quake

nk success to our scheme. You've had yours, you know. Our p

lowed him as he mixed

" he said, "you ought to ask

act that his father had had a

" he said, "and I'll have t

ks been uninspired by Martin. Martin was all love and tolerance: he gave no directions on such infinitesimal subjects as cocktails or whiskie

*

s quite unlike the usual procedure after dinner, for Lord Tintagel generally dozed for a little in his chair, and then retired to his study. But to-night he showed no inclination either to doze or to go away, and it was by his suggestion that the card-table had been brought out. He seemed to Jessie rather restless and irritable, and ha

," he had said. "I did

or a strol

e dusk again, and again

nk he wanted to get rid of us: he may wish to talk to

s suffering, but the whole day he had been like this-gentle, consid

aid. "You know, Archie,

ome provocative rejoinder to his father. But simply, he had not wante

other. I should have had to pump up indignation. But he was rathe

ir. To himself it seemed that he drew in a long brea

tion when I was little. It isn't a vice, it's a disease. Well, I've made a compact with him. I found that he had got it into his head-God knows how-that I-I know you'll laugh-was beginning to take to that beastly muck too. So I saw my opportunity. He's fond of me, you know; he

ay. For though it was a good bargain on Archie's part, the virtue of it would affect not only L

brilliant of you. Do you-do you

here, except when I go up to town for Helena's wedding, and I'm al

ng out further ch

se he saved my life when I was a tiny kid. If I ask William to tell me whether my father gets

her as, she thought, it must be to Archie. Possibly his main motive, that of taking care of his father, was so dominant in him that he

that," she said. "You w

The cure is more imp

ort of bewilderment. It

t, according to her

t would you feel if you found your father had

voice sud

as if I was going to break my bargain wit

bewilderment came over

hie

's impossible for you to get William to have an eye on your father, an

ered this, an

hot within me. Are missionaries born or made, by the way? Anyhow, I'm a mi

Lord Tintagel's study and the windowed door that led into the garden. As they passed this Archie saw a footman bring in a tray on which were set the usual evening liquids,

t away: my father mustn't see it. Just go down opposite the drawing-room windows, will you,

t he wanted, and then, with a swift cunning, he rinsed out the glass with soda-water, drank that also, and, filling it half up again with water, put it on the table by the chair where he usually sat. Then there was the bottle to dispose of, and he went out into the hall to take it to the dining-room. But, even as he crossed the foot of the stairs, another notion irresistibly possessed him, and up he went three steps at a tim

st of taking the bottle to the dining-room

do with it?"

k no time

James to take it away agai

lever of yo

en't they? Let's have one more turn, then. Je

y father to get back.

hie. "Helena must have all she wants

withdrew that, for it struck her that Archie was, in some inexplicable way, perfectly sincere: there was t

e loved is a royal command; all proper people must obey. I have been a rebel you know, and,-oh Jessie, how awfully as

n enquiring

night you were bitter and terrible: you made my heart ache. But all to-day you've been absolutely your old self again. And

her ar

ot of good last night when you made me realize your

accept this, though i

thought

knew my friend

preciated it most when

ing more than

pau

ll me," sa

r friendship, which he truly valued, yearned for his confidence, which is the meat and drink of friendship. Sometimes it was necessary to deceive your friends; it had been necessary for h

ways, to let my hate be turned into love. I can't express to you at all what a difference that made to me. I felt he knew; he could see, as he said, that the darkness in which I thought I walk

f the voices she had heard

artin, and so I invented something-oh yes, that I had been reading aloud what I had written, to account for it. It

ere was knocking or hammering. Did y

"But I don't really kno

trance, I heard loud k

b the oncoming of the

and I talked wit

ugh, hardly knowing what she meant, but speaking from the dic

y knowledge of my own face, just as I recognized the photograph in the cache at Grives from its l

e again?" as

m, he got permission to come to me in my need. Is he not mi

for a moment a little pang of hu

ge of my friendship hasn't had

quite frankly and sincerely. "I thank you for it tremendously;

e star-swarming sky, sundered by t

itions exist for the souls of those we have loved, and whom we neither of us believe have died with the decay of the perishable body? But, my dear, do

ened about it,

spirits, intelligences terrible and devilish, might deceive you into thinki

asn't in sore ne

him with his finger on the bell. Instantly he guessed that he was ringing to know why t

e put before him for him to see the answer to it. In his presence, remembe

od-night to my fath

footman came in from the hall-door. Lord Tintagel l

said. "I rang for somethin

s Jessie said good-night and went also. Archie

ught-reader," he said. "I believe

's grim fa

g devil,"

e lau

id. "You surely don't want to dri

ames didn't bring the w

t to tell

dn't," sa

nly now there doesn't seem to be any p

ening, he had put down his glass half filled with soda. He drank it, sniffing to

some soda," he said. "Not a bad drink, but I th

*

. But, just as she got into the motor, Archie, rosy and suffused with sleep, like a child t

id. "Do come back; come down for next Sunday, and

ittle and then being awakened by the sound of talking next door, and of peremptory resounding tappings. And here was Archie, radiant and fresh and rev

should love to

shouldn't I? Pyjamas and dressing-gown are perfectly decent if William will fetc

my lord," said Willi

ave it then. Good-bye

urd

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