A Chambermaid's Diary

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it, that frightens me. One would say that he was dragging a ball riveted to his ankle, or, rather, the recollection of a ball. Is this a relic of a prison or of a convent? Both, perhaps. His back, too, frightens me, and also his large, powerful neck, tanned by the sun till it

even when it is most repulsive. He is ingenious; he knows how to do everything, even the most difficult and different things, not a part of his regular work. He treats the Priory as if it were his own, watches it, guards it jealously, defends it. He drives away the poor, the vagrant, and the unfortunate, sniffing and threatening like a bull-dog. He is a type of the old-time servant, of the domestic of the days before the revolution. Of Joseph they say in the neighborhood: "There is nobody like him. A pearl!

row himself into the

she overwhelms him with petty

nds to palliate things and beings. Little by little it obscures the features of a face and rubs down deformities; if you live with a humpback day in and day out, after a time he loses his hump. But there is something else; I am discovering something new and profound in Joseph, which upsets me. It is not harmony of features or purity of lines that makes a man beautiful to a woman. It is something less apparent, less defined, a sort of affinity, and, if I dare say so, a sort of sexual atmosphere, pungent, terrible, or intoxicating, to the haunting influence of which certain women are susceptible, even in spite of themselves. Well, such an atmosphere emanates from Joseph. The other da

neeling against the wall where the espaliers stand in line. And suddenly he disappears, he vanishes. Lower your head, and, before you can raise it again, he is gone. Does he bury hi

oseph! whe

fore me in the sunlight, with his severe and impenetrable mask, his hair glued to his skull, and his open shirt

how you fri

terrifying smile, which really has the swift, short f

ating, has been met everywhere with an incredulous shrug of the shoulders. Yesterday the police arrested a poor peddler, who had no trouble in proving that he was not in the vicinity at the time of the crime. The father, to whom public rumor pointed, has been exonerated. Moreover, he bears an excellent reputation. So nowhere is there any clue to put justice on the track of the guilty. It seems that this crime excites the admiration of the ma

w him better. She has behaved very queerly ever since the news. She has ways of looking at Monsieur tha

sieur manifested an intention

emain here. Why do you nee

aturally Monsieur perceives nothing; he does not lose a mouthf

wo of them. Last night, for more than twenty minutes, I listened at the door of the salon. I hea

e you yesterday

s," answer

are s

yes, m

short thirty

ot I who

was th

matter they s

r clues than his eyes, no other proofs than the slight movement of surprise that escaped him when, on my return from the grocer's, I suddenly, in the harness-room, threw in his face for the first time the name of the little Claire murdered and outraged. And yet this purely intuitive suspicion has grown, first into a possibility, and then into a certainty. Undoubtedly I am mistaken. I try t

utraged the little Claire in t

oseph went to the forest of Raillon? I seek in vain to fix the date of his absence. And then, had he really the restless movements, the accusing looks, that I attribute to him, and which denounce him to me? Is it not I who am bent upon suggesting to myself the unusual strangeness of those movements and those looks? Am I not determined, without reason and against all probability, that it shall be Joseph-a pearl-who did it? It irritates me, and at the same time confirms me in my apprehensions, that I cannot reconstruct before my eyes the tragedy of the

went to the forest of Raillon to

s down the newspaper that he was reading.

you ask?

I want

thout affectation, he seems to be ransacking his memory in

exactly; I think, though,

was found in the woods?" I go on, giving to this

become so sharp and so terrible that, in spite of my c

"indeed, I really think t

he a

hing else. If you read the newspaper, you would see that they have been

s voice no longer trembles. I become silent, and Joseph, picking up the newspaper that h

s nothing but swagger, and political swagger at that. I am looking for something more precise and formal, some unmistakable evidence of Joseph's criminal temperament. And I find nothing but vague and moral impressions, hypotheses t

ould kill them with a blow, without giving them pain. But he loves to prolong their suffering by skilful refinements of torture. He loves to feel their flesh quiver and their heart beat in his hands; he loves to follow, to count, to hold in his hands, their suffering, their convulsions, their death. Once I saw Josep

ffer. The more it suffers, the

d beneath its feathers its flesh heaved. Then Joseph threw the animal upon the stone floor of the kitchen, and, with elbows on his knees and chin in his

"Kill it at once; it is horr

seph a

me. I like

; I hear all the words that were spoken. And I have a

ire in the woods. Yes, yes; I am sure o

weakness for scoundrels. There is something unexpected about them that lashes the blood,-a special odor that intoxicates you,-something strong and bitter that attracts you sexually. However infamous scoundrels may be, they are never as infamous as the respectable people. What annoys me about Joseph is that he has the r

ng henceforth can remove the certainty from my mind, tha

s extremely distrustful, and avoids trusting himself to others, for he thinks that they are planning to "take him in." He must be in possession of numerous secrets, but he hides them jealously, under a severe, scowling, and brutal mask, as one locks treasures in a strong-box equipped with solid bars and mysterious bolts. However, his distrust of me is lessening. He is charming toward me, in his way. He does all that he can to show his friendship for me, and to please me. H

woman. Order, you see, means fortune. And, when one is pretty

lone, nothing is more difficult than to make him talk. He refuses all long conversations, fearing, undoubtedly, to compromise himself. A word here, a word there, amiable or crusty, and that is all.

ind Joseph in the harness-room, where, seated at a little white-wood table, he was sorting seeds by the light of a dark lantern. His friend, the sacristan, was there, standing near him, holding under his two arms packages of little pamphlets, red, green, blue, tricolor. With big round

Célestine?" ex

hide his pamphlets, b

Mademoiselle. She

ve him di

ubscriptions. And let me tell you again; go everywhere, into all the houses,-even the houses of republicans. Perhaps they will show you the door, but that makes

r his arms, he started off, Joseph accompanying him as far as the iron fenc

which are being distributed for propagandism. I have made an arrangement with the priests; I wo

rting his seeds. The two dogs, awakened, took a turn

"I get good pay. Oh! the

that he had said

woman and an orderly woman, and because I have con

a si

me out here to-night!" he thanked me; "

over the little table very near him, and, stirring t

ly after dinner; we had no time to gos

élestine, I h

tched h

to my garden-frames. The field-mice do not leave me a salad, th

, appeared before my eyes on the forest heath, frightfully pale and bleeding. But there was nothing wicked in Joseph's looks; they were timid, rather. We could scarcely see ea

," he began; "well, here it is. I have a feeling of friendship for y

assume an archly mischie

e? You never spoke to me; you were always rough with me. You remember the scenes that yo

laugh, and shrug

at the very start. And women especially,-it takes the devil t

o well, Joseph, tell

and serious

Célestine? Yo

like y

u and I, in the very depths of the soul, are

silence. Then he resumed, in

friendship for you, C

the

money, too,-a

A

ot serve forty years in good houses w

e astonished by Joseph's words and

nly a

ch? Let

ve a slig

not here. It is in a place w

but ho

w voice, alm

thousand francs

are well fi

less, too. On

simultaneously, bounded to the door, and

h of them a kick in the side; "simply people passing in

dragging steps in the road, and then a more distant s

e narrow room, his elbows hitting against the pine wainscoting from which leather straps were hanging. We did not speak, I be

nutes he made

ittle café near the water. A little café in a first-rate location. The army is drinking a great deal these days; all the patriots are in the street; they shout and bawl and get thirsty. Now is the time to get it. One could make hundreds and thousands, I promise you. Only, you see, there must be a w

claimed,

se the case. Wou

I

ed from surprise to surprise. Utterly upset, I

res who do not know even how to take a joke; and you are patriotic! And then you are pretty, very nice to look at; you have eyes to drive the whole Cherb

? And

! We would marry,

gnation, "you want me to prostitu

is shoulders, and

ntion, Célestine. That i

, pressed them so tightly that I

I dream of you in the little

frightened by this confession, and wi

teen thousand francs. One never knows how many little ones this money makes. And then,

gainst me, trembling with desire. If he had wished, he could have taken me and stifled

oman, dressed in the costume of Alsace-Lorraine, with a beautiful silk waist and broad velvet ribbons. Hey, Céles

dreamed; but I was also without hatred, without horror, of this man's cynicism. Clasping me with the sa

Possibly. But to fix a woman, Célestine,-mark this well,-th

s one with forebodings! Is

I look at him, and I should like to detest him. I wish that his ugliness would fill me with such immense disgust as to separate me from him forever. Well, no. Ah! how queer it is!