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Nature and Human Nature

Chapter 4 A CRITTER WITH A THOUSAND VIRTUES AND BUT ONE VICE.

Word Count: 6842    |    Released on: 29/11/2017

rner a fishing-rod, and proceeded to disencumber himself of a large salmon basket apparently well filled, and also two wallets, one of which seemed to contain his clothes, and the other, from the dul

brows heavy and shaggy. When addressing Peter he raised them up in a peculiar manner, nearly to th

ther than bestowing on us a cursory glance to ascertain whether he knew any of us, he drew up to the chimney corner, and placing the soles of his boots perpendicularly to the fire (which soon indicated by the vapour arising from them that he had been wading in water), he asked in a listless manner and without waiting for replies, some unconnected questions of the landlord: as, "Any news, Peter? how does the world u

er was required, and therefore made non

s sailors knock against sometimes, and still harder hearts they often find there. A stone in the end of a stocking is a sling for a giant, and soon puts an end to their sufferings; a punishment for wearing gold watches, a penalty for pride. Jolly tars eh? oh yes, very jolly! it's a jolly sight, ain't it, to see two hundred half-naked, mangled, and disfigured bodies on the beach, as I did the other day?" and he gave a shudder at t

rt pause, h

ey. Don't the mountains with their misty summits appear before you sometimes in your sleep? Don't you dream of their dark shadows and sunny spots, their heathy slopes and deep deep glens? Do you see the deer grazing there, and hear the bees hum merrily as they return laden with honey, or the grouse rise startled, and whirr away to hide itself in its distant covert? Do the dead ever rise from their graves and inhabit again the little cottage that looks out on the stormy sea? Do you become a child once more, and hear your mother's voice, as she sings the little simple air that lulls you

etimes," said McDonald, "she treams of

Peter, my boy, give me a glass; it will cheer my heart, for I have been

ing to comply with his request, he relapsed into his former state of abstraction, and when th

a drop of this, it will cheer you up; you seem a peg too low to-day. It's

h give out of their abundance, the poor from their last cup and their l

uld be at leisure next week I would return again. Oh, I wish you had seen him, Doctor, when he heard his native tongue. He threw down his pen, jumped up like a boy, and took me by the hand, and shook it with all his might. 'Oh,' said he, 'I haven't heard that for years; the sound of it does my heart good. You must come again and see me after the steamer has left for England. What can I do for you? So I told him in a few words I w

he grant?" sai

when she came to read it, it was fo

I like that. Fill me another gl

omething else in you than dough pills, and salts, and senna, at any rate, and that is more than most of your craft have, at all events. I'll draw you out presently, for I never saw a

I consait I know a considerable some about it, and ain't above getting a wrinkle from others

round to Cutler, "Captain, excuse me

oat," sai

with animation, "wa

tever, Sir; my vessel is

nd turned again to the fire, with an air, as I thought, of disa

us hear your story about the horse that

that I have described, something like the festoon of a curtain, and a smile playing on his face as if expecting a joke and ready to

sand dollars for him, and so on. Every wrapper I had for my tea had a print of him on it. It was action and reaction, you see. Well, this horse had a very serious fault that diminished his value in my eyes down to a hundred dollars, as far as use and comfort went. Nothing in the world could ever induce him to cross a bridge. He had fallen through one when he was a colt, and got so all-fired frightened he never forgot it afterwards. He would stop, rear, run back, plunge, and finally kick if you punished him

ose of a first-rate horse, that he is obliged to leave behind him. None need apply but th

ns came to know the lowest figure. 'Four thousand dollars,' said I, 'a

e, seeing that a hundred dollars was no more than a cord of wood in his pocket (good gracious, how the

questions you ask,

he so

ail. Drive it all day, and you c

in ha

cell

his mile in

as don

or selling the horse, Slick? for you are not so soft as to

a cow's tail, straight up and down in my

ing, that is right up and down, like a cow's tail, but hang me if he can be the clean thing anyhow he can fix it." And he stretched out his feet to their full length, put his hands in his trowsers pocket, held down h

in' with that are horse is, that I want to go away in a hurry out of Boston clear down

ast is mine, and here is

t a fust-rate critter. He is all sorts of a horse, and one

l in a short while; you soon guess the hour instead of pullin' out the watch for everlastin'. The waggon loses its novelty, and so does the sleigh, and the house is surpassed next month by a larger and finer one, and as you can't carry it about to show folks, you soon find it is too expensive to invite them to come and admire it. But the wife; oh, Lord! In a general way, there ain't more difference between a grub and a butterfly, than between a sweetheart and wife. Yet the grub and the butterfly is the same thing, only, differently rigged out, and so is the sweetheart and wife. Both critters crawl about the house, and

, who seemed to think aloud; "I wonder

for I am too fond of feminine gender to make fun of them. You are a sin

e out1 like the rest. You like him better and better every day. He seems a part of yourself

t. To prove

stamped his fore feet. First Parker coaxed him, but that did no good, and then he gave him the whip, and he reared straight up on eend, and nearly fell over into his waggon. A man that was crossing over at the time took him by the head to lead him, when he suddenly wheele

es, and puts him into another carriage, and off he starts agin, and thinkin' that the horse had seen or smelt sumthen at that bridge to scare him, he tries another, w

has dashed two carriages all to shivereens, and nearly tuckard the innerd

cious sake don't come to me to teach you manners, I beseech you, for I am a rough schoolmaster,

living man could git that horse acro

cost, for he nearly killed me in

reason for parting with him was, that you w

of it. I said I wanted to quit the city, and was compelled to leave my horse behind. How could I ever quit the place with that tormented beast? And warn't I compelled to le

hat a devil of a sell,' said he. 'That will b

with your eyes and ears open, and a full knowledge of the truth. And, after all, where will you go to better

me alone.' And he walked off, and

t's a capital story. Oh, you would make a new man of me soon, I am sure you would, if I was any time with you. I haven't laughed before that way for many a long day. Oh, it does me good. There is nothing like fun, is there? I h

r," says I, "for it's worth

, saying to himself, in an under-tone: "Stick a pin in it. What a queer p

rtioned and well developed, you were not aware of her height, till you saw her standing near her sister. Her motions were all quiet, natural, and graceful, and there was an air about her, that nothing but the native ease of a child of the forest, or highbred elegance of fashionable life, can ever impart. She had the delicate hands and small feet peculiar to

han polished men. There are however splendid specimens of men, and beautiful looking women, among the aborigines. Extremes meet; and it is certain that the ease and grace of highly civilised life do not surpass those of untutored nature, that neither concedes nor claims a superiority to others. She was altogether of a different stamp from her sister, who was a common-looking person, and resembled the

tly. In the evening a young man, of the name of Fraser, with his two sisters, children of a Highland neighbour, came in to visit the McDonalds, and Peter producing his violin, we danced jigs and reels, in a manner

rt, that you have such a store of 'wise saws.' How in the world did you ever acquire them? for your time seems to have been spent more in the active pursuits of life than in

enough in it to change the whole complexion of our life? For instance, one Saturday, not long before I left school, and when I was a considerable junk of a boy, father gave me leave to go and spend the day with Eb Snell, the son of our neighbour old Colonel Jephunny Snell. We amused ourselves catching trout in the mill-pond, and shooting king-fi

r it, and raced to where he was in no time, and sure enough there was his little brother, Zeb, just a sinkin' out of sight. So I makes a spring in after him in no time, caught him by the hair of his head, just as he was vamosing, and swam ashore with him. The bull-rushes and l

f the Snells, and the old woman made right at me, as cros

that the way you take care of that poor dear little boy

eyes like a blacksmith's chimney, and my hat, which was all soft with wat

hunny, who came runnin' out of the m

e couldn't do nothin', but jump up and

of my hands in his, turned to, and gave me a mo

Rose. My! what a slashin' large woman, that was; half horse, half alligator, with a cross of the mammoth in her. She wore a man's hat and jacket, and her petticoat had stuff enough in it to make the mainsail of a boat. Her foot was as long and as flat as a snow shoe, and h

a goin' to kill that boy, massa?' and she seized hold of me and took m

ndalous, ridiculous,' and she held down her nasty oily shiny face and kissed me, till she nearly smothered me. Oh, Doctor, I shall never forget that scene the longest day I ever live. She might a been Rose by name, but she

brave child,' not she, and she kissed me again and again, till I

I touched land, I streaked off for home, as hard as I could lay legs to the ground; but the perfume of old Rose set me a sneezing so, I fairly blew up the dust in the road as I went,

e sun is the matter? What a spot of w

mill pond

so nicely for you. You are more trouble to me than all the rest of the boys put together. Go right off to your room this bles

ad lost my l

ou miserable, onsarcumsised, onjustified, gracel

ldn't have asked that are question,' and I sneezed so hard I actually blew down the wire cag

am! Sam! to think I should have lived to hear you ask your mother if she had ever been kissed by a

I, 'for I have drunk enough to-day

she. 'And when your father comes in I will send

dn't mind what happened, 'who you send, providin' y

oot of the stairs and call out 'Sam.' I didn't answer at f

ke rockets. 4th. You got an all-fired licking from old Colonel Jephunny, till he made a mulatto of you, and you was half black and half white. 5th. You got kissed and pysoned by that great big emancipated she-nigger wench. 6th. You have kil

her again, a rai

I have been punished enough. If you will promise to let me off this time, I will take m

'when I tell you, I a

have been rewarded alre

who said he had drove over to beg my pardon for the wrong he had done to me, and said he, 'Sam, come to me at ten

hment for making wooden clocks. One o' them can be manufactured for two dollars, scale of prices then. Come to me for three months, and I w

e he put my name to it, and called it 'Sam Slick, the Clockmaker.' That book introduced me to General Jackson, and he appointed me attaché to our embassy to England, and that aga

read of in my books, Mr Hopewell, was chock full of them. He used to call them wisdom boiled down to an essence, concretes, and I don't know what all. He had a book full of En

fusty proverbs. A boy might as well wear his father's boots, and ride in his lo

say them both off by heart. But you will see the value of one when you come to know the world, and the othe

essed than I could do them, to save my soul alive. Now I have larned to make them myself. I have acquired the habit, as my brother the lawyer sais, 'of extracting the principle f

How important is conduct, when the merest trifle may carry

n that also. D

d. But Peter wouldn't hear of my leaving his house, and I accordingly

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