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Doctor Claudius, A True Story

Chapter 7 No.7

Word Count: 5961    |    Released on: 30/11/2017

e. Margaret was friendly, and sometimes seemed on the point of relapsing into her old manner, but she always checked herself. What

et, for better for worse, to do with as she would. But he knew the hour was not come yet wherein he should speak; and so he served her in silence, content to feel the tree of lif

en it, and, glancing round the brilliantly-lighted restaurant, involuntarily wondered if any man at all those tables were that moment in such suspense as he. He thought it was probably an intimation that she was going away, and that he was wanted no longer.

I want you to make a list of books to read on the voyage-that is, if I may coun

rely y

novels? He would ask her plainly if she wanted his company on the yacht or no. He would say, "Shall I come? or shall I stay behind?" Claudius had much to learn from Mr. Barker before he was competent to deal with women. But then Claudius would have scorned the very expression "to deal" with them; theirs to command, his t

surable waste of weary years that may lie between "dear" and "dearest," the gulf placed between "sincerely yours, John Smith," and "yours, J.S.," and "your J.," until the blessed state is reached wherein the signature is omitted altogether, and every word bears the sign-manual of the one woman or one man who really exists for you. What a registering thermometer of intimacy exists in notes, from the icy zero of first acquaintance

her note. Of course he had no reason to be disappointed, and he showed his inexperience. She was compensating her conscience for the concession she had made in intimating that he might go. It was indeed a conce

ked her, in connection with a point which arose, whether

have been able to arrange to go with us. I thou

ailed. He might have been satisfied, but he was not. There was a s

you wish me

of his mouth, and his face was white in sunshine. She looked at him suddenly, a slight smile on her lips, and her eyes just the least contracted, as if she were going to say something sarc

art, and she could not hel

rdly knowing what he said, for the

you that ever so long ago," chirped a

e were three ladies-the Duke's sister, the Countess, and Miss Skeat, the latter looking very nautical in blue serge, which sat tightly over her, like t

a barnacle, another will sit in the cabin playing cards; a third will spend his time spinning yarns with the ship's company, and a fourth will rush madly up and down the deck from morning till night in the pursuit of an appetite which shall leave no feat of marine digestion untried or unaccomplished. Are they not all stamped on the memory of them th

they stopped to chat a little, or the Duke would go out and look at the course, and make his rounds to see that every one was all right and nobody sea-sick. But Barker rarely moved, save to turn his chair and cross one leg over the other, whereby he might the more easily contemplate his little patent leather shoes and stroke his bony hands over his silk-clad ankles; for Mr. Barker considered sea-dressing, as he called it, a piece of affectatio

uke's sister, Lady Victoria, she was plain, but healthy, and made regular circuits of the steamer, stopping every now and then to watch the green swirl of the foam by the side, and to take long draughts of salt air into her robust lungs. But of all the party there was not one on whom t

sea, I am positive.

"they take to the water like ducks. But I don't b

r he was an institution with the Duke, and had sailed his Grace's yachts ever since there had been any to sail, which meant for about twenty years. To tell the truth, if it were not for those beastly logarithms, the Duke was no mean sailing-master himself, and he knew a seaman when

k, the other people constantly moving to and fro, the proper aspect of the lady-companion, just out of earshot, and altogether the appearance of publicity which the sea-life lent to their tête-à-tête hours, brought, as a necessary consequence, a certain unbending. It always seemed such an easy matter to call some third party into the conversation if it should grow too confidential. And so, insensibly, Claudius and Margaret wandered into discussions about the feelings, about love, hate, and friendship, and went deep into those topics which so often end in practical experiment. Claudius had lived little and thought much; Margaret had seen

ing of himself, had more than once alluded to his peculiar position and to the unexpected change of fortune that had befallen him. One evening they were grouped as usual around the square table in the brightly-lighted little room that Barker and the Duke affected most. The fourfold beat of the screw crushed

nsation, lots of money. Same thing

," said Claudius; "you knew

likely to have it are about the same as far a

in a tone of profound reflection. "Never had a cent be

rackers, celebrating your twenty-first

d to have it, who has got it in hard cash, and in the only way in which it is worth having-by somebody else's work. Query-what will Claudius do with

l do with his money. He wil

," said the Duke, looking

nk I will,"

I shall do it myself some day, and so will you. Do

Barker knew the Duchess,

aps you are right. If they catch you

m getting old, and my nerves are shaken, and a secret presentiment tells

d the Duke. "No more poker,

st men, but it does not interfere with the innocen

c type of angel. Likes children and bric-à-brac and poultry,

the angelic domestic-the

in America. I know the sort of wo

his chair till it touched the door of the

neteen summers of earthly growth, and eighteen or nineteen h

ing. Claudius, this is inte

s slung on her arms, and generally all over her. That will be

at," said Bar

and you will be married by Poole. It will be very effective, you know. No end of wedding present

ave done," was B

uainted with the peculiarities of American life, bu

were undeniably the outcome of pure theory. He found himself face to face with the old difficulty, the apparent discord between the universal law and the individual fact. But, on the other hand, he could not help comparing himself with his two companions. It was not in his nature to think slightingly of other men, but he felt that the

ly a couple of paces from where he was. In spite of the starlight he could not distinguish the person. She was wrapped closely in a cloak and veil, as if fearing the cold. As it must be one of the three ladies who constituted the party, Claudius naturally raised his cap, but fearing lest he had chanced on the Duke's sister, or still worse, on Miss Skeat, he did not speak. Before long, however, as he leaned against the side, watching the wake

so when the others went to bed I wrapped mys

moved nea

abagie for at least two hours," he s

atmosphere? Why don't you

obacco that suffocated me

as?" aske

Or rather, you know. But to hear those two men talk is enough to make one th

aret asked, and she smiled behind her veil; but he could

ed round so as to rest his elbows on the taffrail. So he stood, bent over and looki

said Margar

ll you, Countess

as you did not lik

d not like it, that is all." Claudius straightened himself again and turned towards his comp

ay-delivered up to torture, as he expressed it-and the Duke undertook to prophes

arker thin

a resigned and melancholy point of view. I suppose he migh

ense, yes," ans

sual sense'?" a

nd position. That is the usual me

not mean any indiv

and accomplished girls it is morally certain that one, at least,

accepted? A charming way of doing things, upon my wor

nto the society of all six, and one of them

in that social arrangement either, exc

beautiful, it only aspires to the practical. If the woman is sa

lf or herself of the other? Wh

long," said she;

ying not to let his voice chang

," she answered in a

shoul

are so easily understood as a c

s? Is not every anticipated thought and wish a triumph more worth living for than everything el

o that; and there is no glory like the glory of success. It is a divine task for any man, and the greatest have thought it worthy of them." Still she was sil

strength and study for the gladness of foreseeing one little thing that you might wish, and of doing it for you.

ones admitted of no laughing retort. She ought to have checked him then, and the instant she had spoken she knew it; but before

trembled in his, but she could not take it away. Before she had answered

" he repeated, and his strength was

you ought not to have said this. It was not right of you." She tr

was almost luminously pale. "All the ages ca

ple, where there was absolutely no escape possible, it was unpardonable. He really ought not to have done it. Did he think-did he flatter himself-that if she had expected he was going to act just like all the rest of them she would have treated him as she had? Did he fancy his well-planned declaration would flatter her? Could he not see that she wanted to consider him always as a friend, that she thought she had found at last what she had so often dreamed of-a friendship proof against passio

before dinner. It was the book they had been reading, and the mark was a bit of fine white cord that Claudius had cunningly twisted and braided, sailor fashion, to keep the place. Margaret rose to her feet, and taking the book in her hand, looked at it a moment without opening it. Then she hid it out of sight and sat down again. The action had been almost unconscious, but now she thought about i

here still, looking out at the ship's wake? Margaret, are you quite sure you never thought of him save as a friendly professor who taught you philosophy? And there was a little something that would not be silenced, and that would say-Yes, you are playing tricks with your feelings, you care for him, you almost love him. And for a moment there was a fierc

said aloud, and proc

t," said the little voice in her hear

I do not love him," she argued,

hat a mess you mak

elf with not having made it clear to him. He said to himself he ought not to have spoken, and then he laughed bitterly, for he knew that all his strength could not h

is not strong enough to make a man move in spite of himself is not worth calling love. I wonder if I flattered myself she loved me? No, I am quite sure I did not. I never thought anything about it. It is enough for me that I love her, and live, and have told her so; and I can bear all the misery now, for

d him a little. At eight bells the Swedish captain turned out, and Claud

Captain," sa

say good evening, Doct

hat tim

dni

shall t

"you won't leave any odds and ends lying about

aid Claudius

ight Svensk sailor when you are awake. You hav

angry little cross sea beginning to run over the long ocean swell. There was a straight black belt below the stars, and a short

But he could not sleep, and he said over and over to himself that he loved her, that he was glad he had to

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