Right Ho, Jeeves

aid, "may I s

ainly

e to say ma

t all,

, the

line a minute. I've

em of where to begin it. It's a thing you don't want to go wrong over, because one false step and you're sunk. I mean, if you fool about too lo

t, and your public is at a loss. It simply raises its

Cousin Angela, my Aunt Dahlia, my Uncle Thomas, young Tuppy Glossop and the cook, Anatole

had its inception, if inception is the word I want, with that visit of mine to Cannes. If I hadn't gone to Cannes, I shouldn't have m

ly, Cannes was th

n. Let me mar

h me travelled my Aunt Dahlia and her daughter Angela. Tuppy Glossop, Angela's betrothed, was to have been of the party, but at the las

lia, Cousin Angela and self off to Can

clear so

t Aunt Dahlia lost her shirt at baccarat and Angela nearly got in

y or thereabouts we parted with mutual expressions of esteem--they to shove off in Aunt Dahlia's car to Brinkley Court, her place in Worcestershire, where they were expecting to

nse, that Jeeves, as we chatted of this and that--picking up the threads, as i

e dialogue ran som

Jeeves, here

S: Ye

an to say,

Precis

ages since

S: Ye

a good ti

ost agree

Win an

satisfactory sum

on the Rialto? Anybody been phoning

ttle, sir, has been

would not be too much

ink-No

s,

mean Mr. Fi

s,

k-Nottle's n

s,

I'm b

time during life's journey who can't stand London. He lived year in and year out, covered with moss, in a remote village down in Lincolnshire, never coming up even for the Eton and

. I would have been prepared to bet that as long as the supply of newts

you s

s,

ame correctly?

s,

London. He makes no secret of the fact that the place gives him the pip. Until

ir

complex. You must have heard of newts. Those littl

rs of the family Salamandridae w

always been a slave to them. H

g gentlemen fre

hat the end would be even then, but you know what boys are. Careless, heedless, busy about our own affairs, we scarcely gave this kink in Gussie's character a

eed,

red to the depths of the country and gave his life up to these dumb chums. I suppose he used to tel

ten the w

nd day and refused to see a soul. That's why I was so amazed when you told me he had suddenly risen to the surface like this. I still can't believe it. I am inclined to think that there must be some mist

to the flat wore horn-

like somethi

a certain suggestion

ppose. But what on earth can

-Nottle confided to me his motive in visiting the

ng l

s,

mean he's

s,

really dashed. I positi

to say, a joke's a jok

inst all the ruling of the form book, might have fallen in love, why should he have been haunting my flat like this?

n a lot of each other at one time, of course, but in the l

l this t

o argument about that. It must have been a nasty ja

-Nottle did not ca

e just told me that this is what he ha

as desirous of establish

n't know you ha

that Mr. Sipperley, a fellow student of whom Mr. Fink-Nottle had been

the first move of any of my little circle on discovering themselves in any form of soup is always to roll round and put the thing up to him. And whe

ed by the man's efforts on his behalf at the time when he was trying to get engaged to Elizabeth Moon, s

acting for h

s,

understand. And what

assistance to him. No doubt you recall Mr. Sipperley's predicament, sir. Deeply attached t

odd

A marked coldness of the feet, was there not? I recollect you saying he was letting--wh

not' wait upon

. But how abo

or cat i' th

ink up these things. And Gussie,

urs to formulate a proposal of

be his wife, he's got to say so, wh

isely

mu

ught that this Fink-Nottle would ever have fallen a victim to the

s,

the life

s,

nd stare into glass tanks. You can't be the dominant male if you do that sort of thing. In this life, you can choose between two cour

, s

s exercised about the poor fish, as I am about all my pals, close or distant, who find

reen things with legs to the luncheon table, crooning over them like a young mother and eventually losing one of them in the salad. That picture, rising before my eyes, didn't give me much confidence i

g to know the worst, "what sort o

y, sir. Mr. Fink-Nottle speak

o like he

s,

her name? Perh

ssett, sir. Miss

ha

s,

eeply i

that. It's a small wo

is an acquaintan

, Jeeves. It makes the whole thing begin to seem

eed,

dubious about poor old Gussie's chances of inducing any spinster of any parish to join hi

omething in wha

ouldn't have

bly no

uld go any too well w

, s

sett, why, then, Jeeves, hope begins to dawn a bit. He's just the s

p one of those effervescent friendships which girls do strike up, I had seen quite a bit of her. Indeed, in m

ressing was that the more we met, the le

uliflower. It was like that with this Bassett and me; so much so that I have known occasions when for minutes at a stretch Bertram Wooster might have been observed fumbling with the tie, shuffling the feet, and behavi

was a pretty enough girl in a droopy, blonde, saucer-eyed

't go so far as to say that she actually wrote poetry, but her conversation, to my mind, was of a nature calculated to excite the liveliest suspicions. Wel

e posish was entirely different. The thing that had stymied me--viz. that this girl was obviously a

nd live only for newts, if you're not--and I could see no reason why, if he could somehow be induced t

the type for

ratified to

good thing and one to be pushed along with t

he honest fellow. "I will a

d everything as sweet as a nut. But at this juncture, I regret to say, there was an unpleasant switch. The atmosphere suddenly changed, the storm clouds

the above exchanges, I should explain, while I, having dried the frame, had been dressing in a leisurely manner, donning here a sock, there a sh

rises had arrived, another of those unfortunate clashes of will between two strong men, and that Bertr

party was accustomed to attend binges at the Casino in the ordinary evening-wear trouserings topped to the north by a white mess-jacket with br

e these mess-jackets had, as I say, been all the rage--_tout ce qu'il y a de chic_--on the Cote d'Azur, I had never concealed it from myself, even wh

red to

eater respect for Jeeves's intellect than I have, but this disposition of his to dictate to the hand that fed him had got, I felt, to be checked. This m

aid. "Something on

annes in the possession of a coat bel

n the steely

tone, "the object under advisemen

ore it

ry n

not proposing to wea

e had arrive

, Je

, si

e saying

te unsuita

the public tomorrow at Pongo Twistleton's birthday party, where I confidently expect it to be one long scream from start

good

foe. Presently, having completed my toilet, I bade the man a cheery farewell and in generous mood suggested that, as I was dining

eem to thin

sir, I wil

ed him n

dudgeon

premises. Mr. Fink-Nottle informed me he

ing, is he? Well,

good

s,

y and soda,

good

ho, J

off for t

orthcoming merry-making of his, of which good reports had already reached me

oom, and scarcely had I entered the sitting-room when I found that thes

that it was Gussie Fink-Nott