Lazy Thoughts of a Lazy Girl / Sister of that Idle Fellow.""

us word! Why were such things ever invented? W

e he takes to separate his packets (I sometimes think these men find pleasure in tantalizing you, and keep you waiting on purpose), and when

prawly, flourishy writing, so unmistakably suggests a bill, that you-well, I do not know what you do on s

-mere items in fact, and yet when quarter day comes round you are presented with a bill a yard long, which a

op people appear to take hours over a simple addition sum. "Eight and elevenpence halfpenny if you please, ma'am." Of course you have not enough silver, and so are obliged to wait for change. Then someone has to be found to sign. Altogether it takes quite five minutes longer paying ready money; and think,

e seen old ladies order nearly the whole shop out, turn over the articles, and having entirely exhausted the patience of their victims, say, "Yes-all ve

y bills were ten times as big as usual. I had no money com

ensive education, of being taught French and German-neither of which languages, by the way, when brought to the test, a girl can ever talk, or at any rate so as to be understood. What is the good of it all, I say, when you want to turn your hand to making a little money? I felt quite angr

fully humiliating business. At the first place I could have slain the man for his impertinence in declining, and I left the shop with a haughty mien and my head in the air. But I grew accustomed to it in time, and even used to try a little persuasion, which, however, proved of no avail. One man offered to exhibit my wares (I felt quite

d. I wrote directly offering my services, and charging a shilling per piece or song. For a wonder I was successf

n in an uneducated hand, and she addressed me as if I were a servant. She used to give me very little time in which to transpose her songs, and

, or she found others to do the work cheaper, I do not know, but she

s sent out. What a lot of money you expect to obtain for it! You do not intend to be unprepared, so you spend every penny in your mind beforeha

since she took me and my family off in one of her books. It is such an easy thing to do. You only have to find out a person's peculiarities-and everyone has a peculiarity!-and overdraw them a little. My sisters and I, I remember, f

able-three or four strangers as a rule, who have never seen each other before, but who considerately assemble in one place to meet their doom. Then the last pages will never fit in with the first. Your meek but lovely heroine at the beginning has been transformed into a beautiful vixen as you near the end, and is quite unrecognizable. The worst

them when once their curiosity is roused. And yet curiosity is always imputed exclusively to women! Though Eve was the first to taste the apple, Adam had no intention of bei

self when he brought back my first tale. It was returned with the Editor's "complimen

pon anything in the literary way again. But habit is second nature, they say, so after that and other tales had been the round of all the magazines and returned to their ancestral home, decidedly the worse for their outings (change of air evi

ugh for this fanciful and scientific age. The world only cares for impossible adventures and magic stori

hequer," as Miss. Mathers calls her; a "wardrobe keeper," as she terms herself. Inde

For the fattest, ugliest, oiliest old creatures to be found anywhere, commend me to a Chancellor! I paus

mptuous sniff (what eloquence there is in a sniff!), and then begin to talk of the "ilegant costoomes she 'ad 'ad lately of Lady --, of the 'ansome silks and furs purchased from the Countess of --," &c. It was cunningly and knowi

each of gentility to be found mixed up in any such transactions. We are so foolish, we have such little minds, we try to hide our doings from our neighbors, who are all going through the same experiences, and are equally desirous of conc

he given such large amounts. I was quite sorry to find her so well at her next advent. Her sniff was even more el

m?" was her invariable ejaculation, and then, hearing your reply, would break in on whatever you said by "It ain't worth more than 'arf that to me, mum," in the most aggrieved voice. I became used to her in time, and knowing she would halve whatever I said, used to demand double the worth of the thing. "What d'yer think yerself, mum?" You grow so

ng round again, so I expect there will be some more soon.

notion, but I attribute a

sh to live

ider run

ng that my wholesale massacre of this obnoxious insect has

nasty little worries, they deserve everything that happens to them. But it is the appearance of a spider that is so against it. There is a shifty expression about the eye, and such a leer on the upper lip. Money spinners are not so objectionable

room of such enormous dimensions that he had t

nly; not so much on account of the unusual size of the spider