Dance With Demons

My parents died to protect me. They lost their own lives to let mine live. They shielded my said future even though it caused them to lose theirs.

I should feel happy. I should feel glad that I'm still breathing and kickin'. I should be grateful that I am still able to see the light behind those windows.

But I don't feel happy at all. I don't feel like living. I don't feel alive. I can't see the light.

All I could feel was sadness. All I could feel was guilt. All I could see was darkness. I may still be breathing. I may still open my eyes but I'm already dead.

They shouldn't have done that. They shouldn't have left me all alone. They should have let me die together with them.

Pagkabukas na pagkabukas ko nang aking mga mata ay kadilaman ng buong kwarto ang agad na bumungad sa akin. The only thing that was glowing inside my room was the glowing ballerina sticker at the wall above my headboard. The glowing ballerina sticker was surrounded by glowing butterflies also.

It's the only thing that gives the light in my silent-dark room. I hate light pero hindi ko kayang itapon ang mga sticker na 'to dahil regalo pa ito ng mga magulang ko. It was their last gift before they left me. A congratulatory gift for my successful performance, and the last performance I ever had.

After their death, I don't know how to dance anymore. I don't know how to move my body together with the music. I already forgot how to tiptoe my feet and turned my body around gracefully.

Every night, my parents' bodies that were bathed in their own blood are still hunting me. They rarely show up in my dreams but every time they'll visit me in my sleep, it's always their dead body. It's always the accident that happened four years ago.

I always heard from the people outside of this room that I should have moved on. That I should continue my life like how my parents want me to. Easy to say than done. Because every time I stepped my foot forward, I always found myself at the four corners of this room.

I groaned as the sunlight outside my room's window replaced the dark light. I covered my eyes using my two arms as the dazzling light hit it. I silently whimpered in frustration when an annoying voice echoed in every corner of my room.

"Wake up, brat! I'm going to dress you up," She shouted.

"What is it this time, old lady?!" I shouted back, still covering my eyes.

"I told you to stop calling me old lady, I'm still in my 30's!"

"You're already 36 years old. It was already enough reason to call you old, old lady!"