Natatanging kanlungan

It's Monday and I woke up early, realizing it's our first day of school so it's not good to come late. I grabbed my towel and walked into the bathroom. I know my whole day would be busy again because there is a lot to do at school.

By the way, my name is Precious Sarmiento, 36 years old, and have a daughter who is studying in grade 7 in a private school. My husband and I have been separated for ten years after I caught him cheating with one of my colleagues. Since then I have supported my daughter alone and never asked for support from my ex-husband. Last year lang din na-annulled and kasal namin kaya gamit ko na ulit ang apleyido ko sa pagkadalaga.

I work as a Junior High School teacher in one of the public schools in our province and I'm currently an adviser in Grade 10. At first, I don't want to be a teacher because it's something that does not exist in my vocabulary. But maybe, I am destined to be in this field and it's God's will, so I have gradually learned to love this job especially that I need to suffice my daughter's needs.

The days fly so fast, that I haven't enjoyed my vacation. And here again! The beginning of a new school year.

Our school is just five minutes away from my boarding house where I used to commute everyday on a motorized tricycle. I just rented a room that is enough for me since my daughter stays with my mother in the city and we only spend time together during weekends.

Nagmamadali akong bumaba ng tricycle at agad na pumasok ng gate. Salamat naman at hindi pa ako late. Nakakahiya namang ma-late sa unang araw ng pasukan. Nagtungo ako sa aming faculty room at umupo saglit while waiting for the flag ceremony.

At exactly 7:30, pumunta na ako sa aking classroom. Ngunit hindi ko alam kung bakit ako biglang kinabahan. Malakas ang kabog ng aking dibdib at pinagpawisan ako ng sobra kahit maaga pa lang. Maybe, I am just excited to meet my new students. I said at the back of my mind.

Nang makapasok na ako sa loob ng classroom, nagsipagtayuan ang mga estudyante at bumati sa akin. Karamihan naman sa kanila ay dito nag-aral since grade 7 kaya kilala na nila ako.

"Good morning Ma'am Precious"

"Good morning", I responded to them.

"By the way, for those who do not know me yet, my name is Precious Sarmiento, your adviser in this section", nakangiti kong sabi sa kanila.

Pagkatapos kinuha ko ang masterlist at nagsimulang mag roll-call. Ngunit hindi pa rin nawala ang kaba sa dibdib ko at sa tingin ko mas lalo yata akong kinabahan. This is my first time to feel this way and I find it very unusual.

I looked at my students one by one as I called their names.

"Chris Laurente"

"Present ma'am."

My eyes landed on the student who raised his hand. And I couldn't believe what I saw. I deliberately blinked my eyes and looked at him again.

"Oh my God!" I uttered softly.

Napahinto ako at napatitig kay Chris. Kaya napansin tuloy ako ng mga estudyante at lihim silang napangiti na para bang kinikilig na ewan!

I averted my gaze and continued doing the roll call up to the last student. There are fifty-seven of them in the classroom. Well, I'm used to this number of students every year. Sometimes, it even reaches 60 plus, so it's hard to handle all of them especially that they have different characteristics.

I didn't discuss my first lesson in English yet, instead, I conducted a diagnostic test. Habang nag focus ang mga mag-aaral sa pagsagot sa diagnostic, I looked at Chris again, but he raised his head, and our eyes met.

"Alex!!!" I lowered my voice to a whisper. Saglit na naparalisa ang buo kong katawan nang magkatitigan kaming dalawa. May kung anong kuryente ang dumadaloy sa buo kong kalamnan at parang hinihila ako nito papalapit sa kinaroroonan niya.

I only came back to my senses when I felt the sticky liquid in the corner of my eye. I was afraid that I might give in so I immediately left the classroom and headed to the faculty room. Fortunately, there was no one inside, so I was able to freely shed the tears that I wanted to release earlier.

I sat on the coach while the painful past came back to my memory.

*********

Pagkababa ko ng taxi ay lakad-takbo ako papasok sa Davao Doctors Hospital. Takot at pagkabahala ang aking naramdaman, nang tuntunin ang kahabaan ng ospital. I was gasping for breath, while tears started to fall from my eyes.

"Diyos ko, sana walang masamang mangyari kay Alex," usal ko sa aking sarili.

Maya't maya'y sinalubong ako ng Mommy ni Alex at iyak ito ng iyak.

"Tita, kumusta po si Alex?" natataranta kong tanong.

She did not respond, instead, she was just crying at the top of her lungs. I pulled her into a hug and comforted her.

Kinuha ko ang bottled water sa bag ko at pinainom sa kanya. "Tita, please calm down."

Buti naman at kumalma na rin ito pagkatapos ng ilang sandali.

"Alex is still in the ICU. He had just undergone surgery due to traumatized brain injuries and blood clots. Pero hindi pa rin siya nagigising until now," wika ng Mommy ni Alex at muli na namang naging emosyonal ito.

Mas lalo akong kinabahan sa sinabi ni Tita ngunit sinikap kong magpakatatag.

Maya't maya'y dumating na ang Daddy ni Alex at agad naman akong nagmano sa kanya.

"Excuse me, Mr. & Mrs. Suneco, gising na ang pasyente at gusto raw kayong makausap pati na rin si Precious," wika ng doktor na noo'y kalalabas lang ng ICU.

Nagmamadaling pumasok ang mga magulang ni Alex, samantalang nakasunod naman ako sa kanila.

Hindi ko maiwasang mapahikbi habang nakatingin sa best friend ko. Tinanggal muna ang oxygen para makapagsalita siya ng maayos. Nakikinig lang ako sa may di-kalayuan habang nakikipag-usap siya sa Daddy at Mommy niya. Pagkatapos, ibinaling niya ang tingin sa akin at pinalapit niya ako. Ngumiti siya ng bahagya, habang ginagap niya ang kamay ko.

"Dude, s-stop c-crying p-please... Ayokong umiiyak ka...Ayo-kong- ma-lung-kot ka," utal-tal na sabi niya.

"Dude, h'wag ka na kasing magsalita, kailangan mo munang magpahinga."

Hindi ko na talaga napigil ang naramdaman ko at napahikbi ako habang nakayakap sa kanya.

"Dude!!!!

*********

I didn't realize that my cheeks were already wet with tears. I really missed Alex so much. And even after many years, his memories still remain in my heart and mind.

I quickly wiped my tears when I heard footsteps coming in. I don't want anyone to see me crying. I am a very secretive person at ayokong magkwento tungkol sa nakaraan ko.