Mary Johnson ~ The Paid Bride

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Being the first child of a Chicago farmer isn't exactly a walk in the park.

Picture this: Heartaches, body pains, barely enough food to go around, the constant struggles to stay sane, and the daily grind of farm life. It's like living in a soap opera but with more mud and fewer dramatic pauses.

I'm Mary Johnson, the proud firstborn of Mr. and Mrs. Becky Johnson.

My parents are the epitome of hardworking citizens: devoted Christians who place value on big and small things.

We live in what you might call a "charming" little cottage that's really more of a glorified shed, and a tiny patch of farmland not too far from the bright lights of Illinois.

We weren't rolling in dough, but hey, we had just enough to keep the pantry stocked. Well, that was the case until my siblings came into the picture.

Lisa and Lora weren't twins, but they sure look and act like it. They've won the admiration of everyone around them because of how brave and intelligent they are.

Honestly, though, once they showed up, it felt like the chaos level in our house – our little house, went from mild to 'hold onto your hats.'

Don't get me wrong-I love them more than I love my morning coffee if I ever had any. I'd do just about anything to make them happy.

But is it too much to ask to have a little bit of peace and maybe a chance to live for myself? Not that it's ever going to happen, but hey, a girl can dream, right?

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Now eighteen, I was supposed to enroll in a local college, on the outskirts of our town, and boy, how excited I was that day. It has always been my dream to go to college, but since we weren't that financially stable, I never voiced it out until dad said I should go.

Mom and Dad were ready to sponsor me. I didn't know how they were going to do it, so all I had to do was prepare myself, even if it was late.

That was my plan until I found out that my going would hold Lisa and Lora back from school because we had not paid their fees, since Grade 2, and I later discovered that all the money dad had then was saved for my college entrance.

To be honest, that didn't sit well with me; I mean, Lisa was barely twelve and Lora was just ten years old. Every morning, I loved to watch the joy on their faces when they made a run for the school bus, and when they returned, or the fight between themselves when they argued about a single spelling.

These little things made me happy, and I know they were too, both were eager to learn new things, and they were happy to be taught, just as I was and still am.

But now, what would happen to that eager thirst for knowledge and those big, happy smiles they wore heading to and from school? I tried not to dwell on the fact that our society practically worships education-like if you don't have it, you're a total nobody.

"This is messed up. I can't just let this slide," I thought to myself, pacing around in my so-called room, which had enough holes to air out all the world's problems.

The next morning, we sat down to eat the-not-much of a breakfast, just vegetables and water; I noticed that Lisa and Lora didn't have their usual happy expression, "I guess they heard." I murmur to myself, as I try to eat something.

I didn't have the appetite, but leaving the food meant wasting it, and in my home that was forbidden, so I just took my spoon and forced a lot down my throat, which brought tears to my eyes.

"Wow, calm down, Mary; no one is taking your food away." Mom queried.

"Yeah," I replied hastily, just wanting to finish it, and hurried to my room.

"Mary," Dad called out to me.

"Yes, papa?" I raised my head to face him.

"Here, take this." He said and handed over to me an envelope, which I took. I looked inside, and it was full of money. Even if a spirit had told me that my parents had such an amount of money saved up, I would not believe it. I looked at my pa in awe. "This is a huge sum of money." I blurted out, there was no need to count it.

"Of course, it is." Mom replied, "Your father and I had been saving it up for your college."

"Oh." I should be happy, but I am not. Saving it up? This means they had to work ten times harder than before, Looking at both of them now, they looked old and haggard for their age. I looked at my father sadly, "But Papa..."

"It's okay." Father said, cutting me off, "Your mother is right. We have been saving up ever since you said, you dreamed of going to college. I already called the school. Even if it's late, they are ready to give you one more chance; so you have..."

As dad continued, I half paid attention to him, As I observed my sisters at the other end, Lora stared at her food blankly, trying to fight back tears.

Lisa, being the older one, was trying to act tough as she spoke to me, "Wow, big sis, you are going to college? I'm happy for you. We are going to miss you." When she smiled, I knew she meant it.

I couldn't hold it in anymore and just teared up, I sobbed like a child. While Dad just watched me confusedly; Mom hurried to my side. "What is going on with you?" Mom asked worriedly. "Why are you crying like a child?"

Instead of answering her, I cried harder, and then Lisa worriedly asked, "Was it something I said?" She looked from dad to mom and then back to me, about to tear up, "I am sorry, I didn't..."

When I saw a single tear in her eyes, I hurried to her side and called her into my arms, I hugged her tightly "Oh Lisa," I said between tears,, "it is not something you did, I am so, so sorry."

"What? I don't understand. Why are you apologizing? You did nothing wrong." She said, confused.

"No, I did everything wrong." I sob as I hold her face up; I can't let them be driven to an edge this early. "Can you ever forgive me?" I asked in tears.

Lisa took my hand from her face, she teared up as well, and Lora followed, "Of course, big sis." She sniffled and added, "I forgive whatever you think you did wrong." She smiled, and it was the best.

"Thank you," I said and stood, and patted both her and Lora's heads.

"Mary." Father, who had been quiet, called me.

"Yes, papa?" I answered as I dried my tears.

"I don't know what happened or what you think you did wrong, but everything will be okay; alright?"

"Of course, papa," I said as I returned to my seat. I knew what I had to do. My mind was made up, and they are not turning back now. I looked up at my father, who was observing me, perhaps waiting for me to say something. Determined, I handed over the envelope back to him. "I can't accept this, sorry, papa."

While Dad remained quiet, Mom attacked me with questions, "What are you doing, Mary? This is your tuition fee and nothing else."

"Why?" Father calmly asked me.

I sighed "Papa, this money is meant for my tuition, right?"

"Yes." Dad replies, "Two years of it, to be precise." He added as he ate.

"Lisa and Lora's fees will only take half of this money, right?" I asked again.

"What are you trying to say, Mary? Speak in a language I will understand." He said as he looked at me with questions and confusion in their eyes. All of them stared.

"Yes, sorry." I paused then continued, "I think it's best if the money is used for their tuition and probably take care of a few things in the house, God knows there are many things to take care of."

"Are you even listening to yourself, Mary? For years you have been dreaming of college, even if you didn't say it out, we figured it out with the longing you had on your face whenever those college students pass by the farm." Mother was clearly angry. She continued, "We had to sell a lot of things, and work a lot of shifts just for you to go to college, and now that the dream is within your reach, you are giving it to your siblings? What is wrong with you?"

"But mom..."

"Don't you mom me, you're our first child, Mary, and you must be educated, whether you like it or not. Your sisters are still young; they can continue their education some other time but not you."

I watched my sisters from the corner of my eyes, their head was bent down and they trembled, no doubt crying from Mother's harsh words. I closed my eyes as I prayed to a higher power for confidence and strength be-cause I will need it to persuade my stubborn mother, "No mother, that's not fair."

"What?" She was shocked, did I just challenge her? Papa remained silent and just watched.

Yes. In my family, things like breaking the house rules, which are a lot, by the way; challenging and throwing words at your parents or elders, whether they are in the wrong or not, are never permitted. Devoted Christians, did I mention?

But It was about my sisters if I don't stand up for them now, when will I ever? "Sorry if I sounded kind of rude but I don't think this is the right way to go about it."

"And what do you know about the right way, Mary? You are just eighteen. Are you going to teach your parents how to do the right thing?" she asked glaringly.

"That's not what I meant, mother." Annoyed now.

"Oh really? What did you mean then? Please do tell." She added blankly.

"Being the first child doesn't mean I have to be the only educated one in the family," I declared, glancing from Dad to Mom, who was watching me silently. I took a deep breath and continued, "I can always go to college or university. Sure, it won't be a walk in the park, but I'm your child. I'm smart, confident, brave, and hardworking. I can do whatever I set my mind to-work or school. Not going now won't stop me in the future. But what about Lisa and Lora?" I pointed at my younger sisters, who were now looking at me with hopeful eyes, and I drew strength from their gaze.

"Mom, society is moving forward every day. In five years, Lisa will be sixteen and Lora fifteen. Are they supposed to go back to grade 1? Of course not. It'd be a nightmare for them. The stares from little kids, and they can't even get into college without first finishing grade school."

Should I end it here? I thought. 'Nope. since I've got the chance to speak up, I need to lay it all out.' I murmured to myself, gathering my resolve.

But then Lora spoke up, beating me to the punch. "Big sister, I'm sure that's not what Papa and Mama meant. I mean, we can always go to school again, right?" she asked, turning hopefully to Mom.

I answered before Mom could, "And how are you so sure about that, Lora? If you haven't noticed, things aren't exactly smooth sailing for us. If we let this opportunity slip by, do you really think you and Lisa will ever get to go to school? What if the job you want in the future requires a solid education? What will you do then?"

Lora slumped in her chair. "Oh, I didn't think of it that way."

"Yes, and that's why you need me, Papa, and Mama to think ahead for you," I said. "I can still go to school, even at twenty-eight, or thirty. Married women go to college and university. But starting over from grade school? That's another story. Mama, think about it-five years from now, I'll be twenty-three. I can handle the pressure and tackle whatever the world throws at me. I'm a Johnson, after all. We're taught to be strong, bold, and resilient. So, sure, I can always go to school later, but Lisa and Lora? When their enthusiasm for learning starts to wane and they lose interest, what then? Because whether we like it or not, it will happen." I locked eyes with Mom, waiting for her come back to that.

But with the look in her eyes, I doubt she would have anything to say--- I hope so.