She Falls to the Sky

“Hey, good morning,” Her husband said, planting many kisses from her face to her ears and her neck. His hands already found their way to her breast from under the sheets and cupped them before she opened her eyes.

Without giving her any chance to respond to his greetings and tell him she wasn’t in the mood, his hands were on their way to her pants as they struggled to get them off her legs.

His lips nibbled on her neck, kissing and sucking on her chocolate skin. Kambili let him; surely he wouldn’t even believe her if she told him that she was not in the mood. For him, it would be another of her excuses not to have sex with her husband.

And she didn’t want that. She didn’t like it either. So she let him. Besides, she was married to him, and it was only right that she gave him sex whenever he wanted it, as much as he wanted it. She lay still, faking out a moan as he penetrated and began thrusting and pommeling in and out of her like he was training for a marathon.

Was she enjoying it? No. Did she want to have sex? Yes. She just couldn’t say what had happened to her or her libido. In the beginning, it wasn’t like that. She used to anticipate sex with Aaron like she anticipated Christmas. And she loved sex with him like she loved eating ice cream, even in cold weather.

But now, after six years of being married to Aaron, she couldn’t explain what went wrong. Also, she couldn’t say that Aaron wasn’t doing what needed to be done; at least she hoped he was.

Because she couldn’t blame him for anything, she blamed her stupid libido, maybe, or the fact that she had begun thinking so much lately. She couldn’t say exactly what had gone wrong with her. And when he climaxed, she had to fake her orgasm. Fake that she enjoyed it all along.

She hated it every time she had to fake her orgasm. Hated it all the time she had to pretend. But for her husband, for the sake of their love, and the sake of their marriage, she would, and she did.

Even when she felt guilty in many ways, she didn’t like upsetting Aaron, no matter what.

 “So, what’s your plan for the day?” He asked Kambili who was standing up and making her way to the bathroom.

 “I’m meeting with Dr. Fred today,” she replied as she turned on the shower.

“Dr. Fred? That, Dr. Fred? Why are you meeting with him?” He asked, going to meet her in the shower.

Dr. Fred was her doctor somehow and he was a friend of her father's.

He had also taught her back when she was in medical school. After years of joblessness and with her husband owing the bank, she couldn’t possibly remain jobless.

 So Dr. Fred was the only one she had to run to for help. Just the day before, he had called her to meet up with him in the hospital. Though she didn’t know why, she only hoped it was for the best.

“I asked him to help me with a recommendation. I’m tired of being jobless and wasting my degree.” Then she stepped out of the shower, wrapping a large green towel around her body.

“Why do you want to work all of a sudden?” Aaron asked calmly but upset.

“Because I’m tired of being jobless. And besides, we still haven’t paid the loan you took from the bank.” Kambili said and walked over to the dresser to pick out what to wear.