Confessions of a Young Lady

rrel. I do not say that the fault was entirely his. But that is not the point. The point is whether, every time you happe

uite certain that you cannot be ninety in five minutes. I was perfectly aware that Mr Sanford was twenty-five. It is not a time of life against which I have a word to say. I feel sure that it is a delightful age. But I c

and a book on my head, he said he never should have thought it from the look of me. Which was not a nice thing to say. But then brothers have manners of their own. I want to know wha

"They'll be like boats on me

ut it was out before I even guessed it was coming. As it was out, it was. And, anyhow, it was simply the truth. At the time,

in my mind. I shall never forget it--never--not if I live long enough to lose my memory. It was very cold. All the week it had been freezing. That is, off and on. Because I admit that it might occasionally have risen ab

he saw them, "what are y

em. What is one generally s

. After two or three days' more frost, pe

ad of taking it for granted that, because he said a thing, the matter was necessarily

ll be strong eno

much d

? Do yo

lit

ine have gone off, they alone know where, may I

ice. I'm sure you'll find that it won

not very rusty. And I don't suppose y

hem up--a

and I daresay my feet are not very

t w

xamine the ice. But when you get to it you'

we so seldom get any, I like to take advantage of every chance I get. Besides, I am not afraid

eant to be comical which puzzled me and annoyed me too. Fortunately for

will find that they are not like boats. I am cr

trouble--it's so sweet of you. Oh, what lovely gloves. Just the shades I

t, who knows anything at all. They require coaxing. Especially is this the case when your hands are cold. And certainly the task is not rendered easier by the knowledge that you are being observed by critical, supercilious eyes, towards whose owner you entertain a touch of resen

tly he

ight, are

ean? I suppose they'r

ink it might have been better to have kept the origin

n't want ease

l point of view. Do you w

are possibly not aware that a new glove always

so it

h I felt sure it was intended to convey. I gave an angry try at the glove, and

quart into a pint pot so

never compared my hand with either a quart or a pint pot. An observation of that kind it was impossible that

f gloves which have become adapted to th

, Mo

ian name, Mr Sanford. I have noticed that you have done so

ey twinkled there was always something in his voice which, to the trained ear, was unmistakable. Not that I wish it to be

proper and delightful proportions should show a desire to be the possesso

calling a monster

leave to observe that you have as dainty, as well-shaped, as capable,

taste, are they? I believe I have had o

that my cheeks were glowing, and my eyes too. It was plain that I was in a perfect passion. The most exasperati

is of opinion that I ought to wear six and three-quarters I shall have to. But I will give him clearly to understand that, whatever siz

older and colder, till I felt I must be congealing. But I knew that he hated waiting, so, while I dawdled, I wondered if everybody was crushed by e

that you have not remained on my account. I didn't hurry. E

would a

g to skate, and I am

sk me to come with you to

as you're nervous, it's hardly worth while to put you to any further trouble

y more objectiona

no accounting for

ertainly

tended, I will wish you good-day. An

But I'm going with you all the same. I'll borrow Dick's sk

your taking them; but as you're not going to skate, rea

l of pleasure for me. Le

I prefer to ca

hed out his arm, and took the skates from my hand. The astonishi

appear to be under the impression that people are not entitled to have opinions of

. Suppose

to go at all. From the way we were beginning I foresaw what would be the end; or, at least, I imagined

knows it, and is therefore indisposed to take any notice of your tantrums, being resolved, do what you will, not to take you seriously. That was what used to make me so mad with Mr Sanford; he would not regard me as if I were a serious character. He would persist in trea

the poet does not say, no prospect pleases when your temper is vile. The mere fact that I yearned to beg Mr Sanford's pardon for being so disagreeable mad

xpert skater,

lling, though, of course,

s in that direction. Like you, I can ke

that I cannot even

gh I did not look at him. After we had gone

woman looks so gra

o any longer after

ve you as looking anything but gr

hink you n

s Bo

Sanf

your

y pardon?

that it would be more becoming on my part

hould prefer to turn back. I

rked, I am convinced that the ice will not

we do go on. On th

t always so

ough I admit that as a rule you are. A

d me domineering. Particularly

ow what you mean. But I am su

ol

He had crossed first, and I was standing on the top step--he was holding m

es

me sometimes. You don't know what

nder any circumstances, nothing I could say or d

't it?

uch too

ung! To

nd manner which gave me quite a start. I snatc

if we mean to do any skating

meekness which was so little in keeping with his general char

bbed by you than flatt

ng how you're always snub

mean to s

ng to so constantly act in direct opposition to your intentions. To

not a woman--

e that I feel--! Pray what sor

ing at the ste

stepping

n who is to lead

t I feel that it is high time that I should put childish things behind

, I wish that you could always be a child. And the pi

n't. It's horrid

s

lways bein

e y

be in earnest. As for opinions of your own--it's considered an absurdity that yo

why I am laughin

ce we had left the stile I had been conscious of the most ridiculous sense of nervousness. A thing with which, as a rule, I am never tr

n anything of

cousin occasioned him surprise; and that not altogether of

of Hetty. Nor am I a

you quarrelled w

hy do you s

ow. You're alwa

s not

at a snub? Or mer

like this? It's you who trea

ake at last, t

fore he knew it. All the same he reached the lake as soon as I did. He could run, just as he could do everything else. The ice looked splendid, smooth as a sheet of glass. All about were the pi

to get them on at once. Doesn't t

he edge. It gave an ominous crack. I daresay, if he had waited, long enough, it would hav

rees. Besides, the water is so shallow that it is practically cat's ice. I'm sure it's

t is not saf

give me my skat

see that I had no intention of b

you will be advised. I

ive me my

laughing at unexpected moments, when the

decided. We will

cism. Who appointed you to have authority over me? Who suggested that because I choose to do a thing you should do it

kate, I s

dity. There is room on the lake for two. If y

skate whe

--you are i

our courteous suggestion, and go h

ill never speak

ving put childish things behind you. I did not sus

give me

on for you. Where do you t

air, he white with rage. It wasn't easy to make him lo

u for your assistance. I prefer t

eel right th

call thi

." We went on a little further. Then I stood on the edge. "You perceive that

ut them o

d you that I will d

ntly useless to remonstrate, I obeyed, placing myself on the sloping bank. "There is a condit

mise nothing

id I shall have to keep you

r something, it took him a tremendous time to get them properly attached to his boots, while I sat

do get home I will never speak to you ag

is probable that we shall both of us be drowned in the lake.

t that is enough to drown even you, big though you seem to think yourself. Though I

drown

talking like a child now? I quite fail to see

do

ve not the faintest

t you

nd glared at me in such a

don't look at

that there are limit

e jam in the tart; the first bite you don't ge

ble an opportunity for the exercise of your ex

mediately proceeded to comment on it, as if it had

onably shod in decently fittin

erstand that my size in gl

so

d something

tice when I intend to sting them. It makes you fee

rrows of your malice in one's hide for the pr

u thin

d

me. It made me thrill from top to toe. I could scarcely spea

skates com

eem all

tand each other. Are

s not the slightest r

is not all over, and, as you don't know where the weak points

be strong enough to bear you also. So, if you do not desire to add to the

go I g

talk so much

ious passages of arms which we had had together seemed, all at once, to have reached their climax. I was seized with a sudden frenzy of resolve to show him, once for all, that what it was my pleasure to do that I would do. I craved

it almost without conscious effort. The ecstasy of doing something; the sense of freedom which it gave; the delight of tearing through the keen, clear atmosphere; of feeling it upon one's cheeks--ruffling one's hair--exhilarating one's whole being--breathing it in gr

it gl

e it

ation? Isn't it

ss the lake. We swung

t it wasn

t's

the words out of my lips tha

irgin ice make eccentric noises; we're the first

n your theory about the middle being best.

und di

If you'll admit that I am right for once

hing if you'll com

e you to our s

en strides when the cracking noise increased to a distinctly uncomfortable degree. I felt the ice heaving beneath my feet. He

place. Don't stop; g

I can. I shall be all

me you

N

me you

see what. How he managed I did not, and do not, understand. But I know he gripped my hand a

well as I could while

!" he

it we were standing on the shore, a

diot, and that you can haul me about as if

I saved y

ght of your huge bulk, everything would be all right. But you are so grossly selfish that you hate the idea of anyone

are not goin

I am! And you dare to t

lf directly in front of me. But when he saw me looking like black murder he moved

w that, as soon as I was clear off the shore, in spite of my blind fury, I realised that I really was an idiot, and one, too, who was badly in need of a ke

God's sake

head. I did not know what to do, where to go; turning this way and that, only to find the threats of danger greater. The

, I did not appear to have hit on a spot where the depth was twenty feet--or anythi

feel th

lip Sanford's voice as he asked th

to be standing in

e and raise yourself? If you do it

m to be too deep in to

an I get

rest house; and that's the

aiting there? I'll be ba

ospect of being left al

I'm afraid--I'm afraid I'm sinking deeper. An

do my

e the ice had not as yet been subjected to any strain, and carefully adv

I shall get to you! Cheer up!

d on a spot where the depth was twenty feet! And should be drow

d taking to my hands and knees; it will be

ing my draperies about me and freezing the blood in my veins; and I was either sinking lower and lower, or else imagining that I was, w

er forgive m

darl

sh me to in the future--a

sw

rneath my arms; but directly he began raising me the ice on which he was lying gave way, and, in another second he was standing beside me in the water. Just as I was thinking of st

ugh, for all I knew, at that ve

break every bit of ice in front of us. And though none of it was strong enough to bear, it was not easy to bre

Philip asked, when we stood

anything you tell me

lau

little attack of eccentricity just now; otherwise it mig

inion. I knew he was rig

clothes were sopping. But I was never the least bit ill. Nor was Philip. I changed directly I got in; and Philip changed into a suit of Dic

d me was that they seemed to take it quite for granted that Philip and I should be on the terms we were.

one funeral, but you're booke

lves to utter of their sisters are aston