My Discovery of England

ake a new discovery of America. They come over to us travelling in great simplicity, and they return in the ducal suite of the Aquitania. They carry away with them their impres

s in this matter of giving away impressions. We emit them with the carel

rs have been known to land in New York, pass the customs, drive uptown in a closed taxi, and then forward to England from the closed taxi itself ten dollars' worth of impressions of American national character. I have myself seen an English literary man,-the biggest, I believe: he had at lea

have estimated that some of these English visitors have been able to receive impressions at the rate of four to the second; in fact, they seem to get them eve

n of cosiness, of tiny graciousness: in short, of weeness." But compare this-"New York," according to another discoverer of America, "gave me an impression of size, of vastness; there seemed to be a big ness about it not found in smaller places." A third visitor writes, "New York struc

seem to fall short of reality. Let me quote a few ot

or, "an impression of something that I could h

nted that Pittsburg has an atmosphere rather than an idea, the

on me the soft and languorous kiss of the Caribbean." This statement may or m

truck me as a large city. Situated as it is and where

hat recurs again and again-"At Cleveland I

hing more than that some one gave the visitor a cigar. Indeed it generally occurs during the famili

gar, the Carnegie public library, the First National Bank (the courteous manager of which gave me an excellent cigar) and the Second Congregational Church where I had the pleasure of meeting the pastor. The pastor, who appeared a man of breadth and culture, gave me another cigar. In the evening a d

ished author's book on The Boyhood of Botticelli has appeared in London, he is seen to land in New York very quietly out of one of the back portholes of the Olympic. That same afternoon you will find him in an armchair in one of the big hotels giving off impressions of America to a group of reporters. After which notices appear in all the papers to the effect that he will lecture in Carnegie Hall on "Botticelli the Boy". The audience is assured beforehand. It consists of all the people who feel that they have to go because they know all about Botticelli and all the people who feel

(or at least I felt) that the time had come when some one ought to go over and take some impressions off England. The choice of such a person (my choice) fell upon myself. By an arrangem

say that my outfit, which was modelled on the equipment of English lecturers in America, included a complete suit of clothes, a dress shirt for lecturing in, a fountain pen and a s

hing the dolphins leaping in the crystalline foam. Since his time so many gifted writers have attempted to do the same thing that on the large Atlantic liners the bowsprit has been removed, or at any rate a notice put up: "Authors are requested not to lie prostrate on the bowsprit." But even without this advantage, three or four generations of writers have chronicled with great minuteness their sensations during the transit. I need only say that my sensations were just as

York. The two trunks that I brought with me were dragged brutally into an open shed, the strap of one of them was rudely unbuckled, while the lid of the other was actually lifted at least four inches. The trunks were then roughly scrawled with chalk, the lids slammed to, and that was all. Not one of the officials seemed to care to look at my things or to have the politeness to preten

k by the dreadful carelessness with which people are admitted into England. There are, it is true, a group of officials said

asked one of them, "whe

he said v

her I am fundamentally opposed to a

. "No, sir," he said. "I

ou care?

ticularly, sir

to arouse him f

bject to any kind of revealed religion, that I regard the state and property and marriage as the mere tyranny of the bourgeoi

for a minute. "You are not I

N

can come in all ri

n. I mentioned this fact to an English fellow passenger on the train, together with a provisional estimate of the American corn crop for 1922: but he only drew his rug about his knees, took a sip of brandy from his travelling flask, and sank into a state

tle bit in such a way as to make a strong draught on his ear. Had this failed to break down his reserve I should have placed a heavy valise in the rack over his head so balanced that it might fall on him at any moment. Failing this again, I could have blown rings of smoke at him or stepped on his feet under the pretence of looking out of the window. Under the English rule as long

of this, and after three hours of cha