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Youth

VIII The Second Confession

Word Count: 1053    |    Released on: 10/11/2017

. “What can I do for you?”I besought him to give me his blessing, and then kissed his small, wizened hand with great fervour. After I had explained to him

ou know what I went there for?” I added, changing my seat to the well of the drozhki, so as to be nearer the driver.“What business is it of mine? I drive a fare where he tells me to go,” he replied.“Yes, but, all the same, what do you think I went there for?” I persisted.“I expect some one you know is going to be buried there, so you went to see about a plot for the grave.”“No, no, my friend. Still, DO you know what I went there for?”“No, of course I cannot tell, barin,” he repeated.His voice seemed to me so kind that I decided to edify him by relating the cause of my expedition, and even telling him of the feeling which I had experienced.“Shall I tell you?” I said. “Well, you see,”— and I told him all, as well as inflicted upon him a description of my fine sentiments. To this day I blush at the recollection.“Well, well!” said the cabman non-committally, and for a long while afterwards he remained silent and motionless, except that at intervals he adjusted the skirt of his coat each time that it was jerked from beneath his leg by the joltings of his huge boot on the drozhki’s step. I felt sure that he must be thinking of me even as the priest had done. That is to say, that he must be thinking that no such fine-spirited young man existed in the world as I. Suddenly he shot at me:“I tell you what, barin. You ought to keep God’s affairs to yourself.”“What?” I said.“Those affairs of yours — they are God’s business,” he repeated, mumbling the words with his toothless lips.“No, he has not understood

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Youth
Youth
“I have said that my friendship with Dimitri opened up for me a new view of my life and of its aim and relations. The essence of that view lay in the conviction that the destiny of man is to strive for moral improvement, and that such improvement is at once easy, possible, and lasting. Hitherto, however, I had found pleasure only in the new ideas which I discovered to arise from that conviction, and in the forming of brilliant plans for a moral, active future, while all the time my life had been continuing along its old petty, muddled, pleasure-seeking course, and the same virtuous thoughts which I and my adored friend Dimitri (“my own marvellous Mitia,” as I used to call him to myself in a whisper) had been wont to exchange with one another still pleased my intellect, but left my sensibility untouched.”
1 I What I Consider to have Been the Beginning of My Youth2 II Springtime3 III Dreams4 IV Our Family Circle5 V My Rules6 VI Confession7 VII The Expedition to the Monastery8 VIII The Second Confession9 IX How I Prepared Myself for the Examinations10 X The Examination in History11 XI My Examination in Mathematics12 XII My Examination in Latin13 XIII I Become Grown-Up14 XIV How Woloda and Dubkoff Amused Themselves15 XV I Am Feted at Dinner16 XVI The Quarrel17 XVII I Get Ready to Pay Some Calls18 XVIII The Valakhin Family19 XIX The Kornakoffs20 XX The Iwins21 XXI Prince Ivan Ivanovitch22 XXII Intimate Conversation with My Friend23 XXIII The Nechludoffs24 XXIV Love25 XXV I Become Better Acquainted with the Nechludoffs26 XXVI I Show off27 XXVII Dimitri28 XXVIII In the Country29 XXIX Relations Between the Girls and Ourselves30 XXX How I Employed My Time31 XXXI "Comme IL Faut"32 XXXII Youth33 XXXIII Our Neighbours34 XXXIV My Father's Second Marriage35 XXXV How We Received the News36 XXXVI The University37 XXXVII Affairs of the Heart38 XXXVIII The World39 XXXIX The Students' Feast40 XL My Friendship with the Nechludoffs41 XLI My Friendship with the Nechludoffs42 XLII Our Stepmother43 XLIII New Comrades44 XLIV Zuchin and Semenoff45 XLV I Come to Grief