A Society Clown

reet Poli

entence as we sp

giate School, I received instructions from my father, who was just starting for Liverpool, that as Mr. Courtenay was ill I must go and "do" Bow Street. Mr. John Kelly Courtenay used to do all th

es. Mr. Burnaby, the chief clerk, was kind enough to let me correct my figures from the depositions which had been taken by him; Sir Thomas Henry repeated to me the gist of his remarks on remanding the case,

rival of any complaint from the papers. Editors are not in the habit of sending letters of congratulation, only of compla

ently flapping round the corner of the shop; so the prisoner, unable to resist temptation, filched it after the manner of a clown in a pantomime. Inspired by the punning humour of Tom Hood, I parodied one of his poems for the heading of my police report. The heading w

er, who, of course, was the responsible reporter, and who, consequently, wrote me a

unerative occupation while studying, and eventually following, the profession of the bar. Circumstances, however, ultimately prevented me from doing either. There are several,

pted, and for the next three years I stuck entirely to the work, assisting Mr. Courtenay, who, in his turn, often assisted me in revising little occasional articles or verses which I wrote for humorous periodicals, &c., some of which were inserte

report,-then the life of a reporter resembled that of a superior loafer-at least, that was my feeling. A reporter is not considered a sufficiently important person to be allotted a room for h

ting for something to turn up. I used to sit in Court and write the opening chapters of three-

t babies, detectives, defendants, and equally interesting people. Sometimes I meandered into the gaoler's room and gazed at the police and the prisoners. So

. However, I have managed to write a case just as well when I have not been present as when I have. The Court was a miserable one for sound, but the cl

oming on. But people of all classes would come day after day, and sit out (especially on a Monday morning) dozens of simple charges of drunk and disorderly, or of fighting and disturbing. This I could not quite understand. The da

e arose. The dock joined the reporters' box. Now ought I to have shaken hands with him? As a matter of fact I never did, but I do not see why I shou

immediately to be accommodated with a seat on the bench and declined to hear the charge of embezzlement that was to hav

-by-the-Sea, which was then under the management of the late E. P. Hingston, who had been formerly the manager of Artemus Ward's lecture at the Egyptian Hall in 1866. [By-the-by, the only other humorist who took part in the concert was J. Hatton, the composer a

all eventually introduced to my new acquaintance, who seemed to have plenty of time and money to spare, and who was the essence of hospitality. As my engagement was terminating he gave us all a parting banquet at one of the principal hotels. Some old frie

obody cared, and every man's health was proposed by somebody else: the

s. a week, was placed in the dock on a charge of robbing his employer. He was committed for trial and ultimately convicted; but in consequence of his p

ished by a printer for me, and consisted of eight pages, a little larger than the Bristol Library Series, with very little

n of their specie was more valuable than that of their brains; but as their contributions were not so bad as mine, no complaint was made. The perio

and genial Mr. Flowers, who died only a few years ago, and Mr. James Vaughan, who sti

vised to go to Mr. Stinchcombe, the theatrical costumier, on some little matter. I entered the front door of the old familiar Police Court. I

es, armour, and tons of theatrical paraphernalia. Out of curiosity I asked to see the cells and was politely shown them. There they were as of yore-the iron doors,

ion. Frequently had he said on the bench that the old court was a disgrace. I could not help thinking what Sir Thomas's opinion of the old Court wou

ssell, who was acquitted on the charge known as the Great Coram Street murder, and on whose behalf Mr. Douglas Straight (now Mr. Justice Straight, of Allahabad) made the best speech he ever made in his life, I venture to think; the female impersonation case; and the charge

nd, in the third person of course. To have done so verbatim would have been an impossibility. To have reported this speech with a pencil and paper would have been a tolerably easy matter, but I wr

er in a book, a little bill on the top, and by writing on the latter the impression is conveyed through the black to the book. Two copies are therefore procured. Imagine, therefore, the

ier-not a mere police courtier. He liked approval, and whene'er he made a palpable hit in a passage of arms with an important counsel (specially retained), he would glance round the Court to see if it had been appreciated. After an effective summing up, the auditors in the b

iskers. He was exceedingly kind-much too kind for a magistrate, and possessed a dangerous talent for being humoro

to a month's imprisonment. On being removed from the dock by the gaoler she shouted, "Look

s room for four hours and had been crying his eyes out, Mr. Flowers added that the child was evidently very sorry for what he had done, and would, therefore, be discharged. The mother who was advised to keep a better watch over h

rship, you've

s: Of cour

tor: Wh

't have me punish a chi

would-what have I had

nk he has been suf

look here-he h

l, he did not do

e snowballed

but he didn't mean

, he has done it

oy you were in the habit of snowballing old gentlemen. At all events, I know I used to

ably good imitation of a genuine one. I'll tell you what I will do-I will give you a good sixpence in exchange; that will put an end to all legal proceedings." Mr. Flowers gave the woman a sixpenny-piece, and requested that the bad one should be broken up. When the

idence to that effect. The complainant, however, did not appear for the purpose of pressing the charge. When t

tion on the evidence of the police): Then, if y

t do it. 'Twas the

n we had better send

, the complainant ain't here. H

or, you and your friend the beer are discharged; but I should advise y

t of this magistrate. It was in the fourth article, and was headed "The Good-humoured Magistrate." He was extremely popular,

ower of "summing up" which is almost thrown away in a police court. He would give a decision (sometimes very elaborate) in every case that came before him. He was quite the reverse of a well-known magistrate of Great Marlborough Street, whose object was to get everything ov

hose who plead gu

cabbies pushed to th

d two shillings-

fifteen

a species of shorthand. Suppose Smith and Brown were charged together with assau

at Smith was to be fined five shillings, or in default of payment to be imprisone

serious warning, which (as Mr. Vaughan is a highly edu

ities were involved in them. In this predicament, I invariably went to his worship and asked if he would give me th

hort extract. A little boy of seven years of age is charged with begging, his excuse being he d

m, give credence to his evidence, which admits of little doubt in my mind. The defence (if a defence it can be designated at all) that you have elected to set up is, to my mind, unworthy of the invention you have thought necessary to bestow upon it. You may not have perused the sections of the Act of Parliament bearing upon this particular charge, but every child must be aware, from maternal or paternal information,

): Oh! how long have I

hat have you got? Why, you've got let off, and d

agistrate had sentenced him to several years' penal servitude, but

ay that the portraits in Vanity Fair, are by "Ape"

seen magistrates wear their hats; and one in particular I have seen walk about the bench with his hat on and his hands in his pockets, and never even remove it when a respectably-dressed woman was making an application to, or giving evidence before, him. If it were compulsory to keep the head cov

g for my right-hand man Mr. Cleverley, whom my father had engaged to assist him. I retired eventually in favour of Mr. Cleverley