Grandmaster Golem, Alchemist Extraordinaire

shackles, tap

gantic meeting room of what he had since l

except one dwarf and two goblins—in suits and tall

in golden armor which covered every inc

gredient, it seemed, as Du

interest to do while standin

s with gorgeous stained glass windows. The figures in these

patron saint of

n of the Order of E

akerman,

philosopher-king,

nd, of course, he had only heard 'that' name when it popped into

s facial hair when I use it,' thought Durri. 'I'm surprised I haven't heard

iny trumpet. "The Tribunal of Top Fellows of the Alchemy G

what the charter calls 'flagrant disregard for guild supremacy,' but I suppos

ed spectacles. "It says here you stand accused of... s

nd gave a dramatic sigh. "By Anaximander'

ou, erm, a chance to explain yourself. Who are

a little t

ur goons threw weakening potions at me, then beat me up and to

say I assumed the military learned from the wizard and the ogres that I was a gole

r a while," she said. "Butler. Whatever. He'd look cute in either uniform, I think. Mr. R

," she had said, eyes warm and full of love, "if a rich lady ever offers to get you out of trouble if you dress up in

pect, "I'd disappoint my dear Mama if I ac

ed a hand dism

ty... Parnesam, right? Being an alchemist by trade, I quickly realized that many people in this city seem

sman didn

had a few shillings on me, so I bought some

e Honing Mind Potion is a semi-secret recipe! By Anaximander's left

he should not have exp

different components. The combination of ginger and turmeric had been cheap and apparently very effective—as well as tasty—so it seemed l

om the witch's curse to the god-clerk's blessing. The secrecy

Durri decided against revealing that he mi

pe," he said instead. "I think h

certain

mong themselves, and then the spokesman nodded a

ked. "You

skull. "We can make rules for all alchemists in the count

low Feeb. As I was saying, the Alchemy Guild

ting potions in return for compensation of any kind, we have authority to turn you into sausa

paper. "You wouldn't happen to be g

turning me into sausage! Look, what do

croll in the air. "Just buy a

as spee

ty c

alent of three 'th

ay back in his original life's

that kind of money?" he a

f Timkin Boil." She gestured lazily at Durri. "Guards, please release this mysterious strang

and hustled him out through the meeting room's huge double

d it with ba

nings—twenty-one shillings—but not the three shill

being turned into s

with its old stone buildings and its strangel

handful of cops had just stood and listlessly watched the armored guild

rolled the whole kingdom. If Durri simply went to another city or

s been bad enough. I really s

passing elvish prostitute. "Pardon me, but can you tell

don't wanna mess around with Crab Boil. Let me introduce you to a couple fri

re saying. And I'm afraid I must decline, unle

oil's den is at the end of Lizard Street. You, uh, won't miss it." She pulled a business card from her sleeve and poke

ode down the avenue, and Durri followed