The Life and Adventures of Maj. Roger Sherman Potter
the day was excessively warm, the Major spoke a few e
me so much, that I forgot to put the prefix of 'Major' to my name, when I registered it in the big book. And this single omission had the effect of consigning me to an attic room in the ninth story. Having intimated an objection to this lofty position, the polite waiter said it was the most convenient room in the house, since, in case of a fire breaking out I could use the sky-light, and, having gained the roof, would be rescued by the firemen with their scaling ladders; whereas, a lower position would ren
, and the glibness with which he discoursed upon the events of the last campaign, I listened to him with profound respect. He said he would see that my name was duly chronicled in the newspapers, not a few of which he assured me he had full control over. In fine, nothing that could serve the interests of one who had made himself so famous during the late campaign was to be left undone. He kne
nd review the police, which body of men had become, under the new order of things, more devoted to beards and brandy than the good order of the city. He said I must be careful not to accept the invitations of councilmen to drink, for they were sure to saddle the payment upon their guest, to say nothing of their lately adopted art of making invitations a means of
le, I joined him, and we were soon at the door of the Broadway Theater, where the General, to his great surprise, discovered that in the change of his vest that evening (he had foregone the pleasure of a very fashionable party in the Fifth Avenue to do me ample honor
tensive acquaintance, for he introduced me to no less than twenty judges of the Supreme Court, whose good opinion, he said, it was well to cultivate, and many other persons, not one of whom was less than a major-general of the Ninth Regiment, a corps somewhat celebrated for its courageous marching and counter-marching up Broadway. Of the etiquette that ruled among the military heroes of New York
appertain to such artless beings as my companion would have me believe them. It struck me, too, that the toilet of these artless damsels was not what it should be. Indeed, there was an extravagance of color, and scantiness at both ends of their drapery, that both my mother and grandmother would have set down as in extremely bad taste. My
is fortune to their love of bright colors. And although he had filled two graveyards with ruined husbands, and was preparing a third for the great number of wives whose constancy he had crushed out with the high price of his laces, no one was simpleton enough to blame him. No matter how many sins of extravagant men he might have to ans
such indeed as I was not accustomed to; but I found them extremely easy to become acquainted with, and in nowise prudish. They did, however, keep up a suspicious intimacy with a brilliantly lighted, though not very
pledged her honor, of which she seemed to have a large stock, to return it safe. As it was the first favor she had ever condescended to ask of a gentleman, she felt sure I could not deny a lady. Notwithstanding my respect for rich bankers and their daughters, I begged that she would excuse me in this instance, and charge to my poverty what might otherwise se
ressed the great delight their company had afforded me, and took my leave, promising to pay them another visit at no very distant day. I now began to mistrust my companion, whose deportment did not
f free stealing, which was to be advocated at great length in its columns. Its general department would, my companion told me, be devoted to the histories of great historians, commencing with Jacob Abbot and ending with Peter Parley. Of its politics not much was to be said, seeing that they were written by my learned friend, Doctor Easley, author and compiler of 'The Polite Speech Maker,' and ought never to be taken as meaning what they said. Sharpeye and Scissors were to be honored with
zation stolen literature would confer upon a nation, I preferred to distinguish my generosity by a more national and less tricky example. This, I obse
would introduce me to the high priest of the Pewter Mug, which was the Star Chamber of Tammany, though many simple-minded people residing in the rural districts had mistaken it for the place in which Mr. Beecher, the reverend, wrote his celebrated star letters. No famous politician or statesman ever visited New York without scenting its pure atmosphere. And even Marcy himself, who, notwithstanding his grie
ere politicians whose metal had been hardened in the furnaces of the custom-house, and had passed enactments, which they enforced with great rigor, that no country-made politician should be
ho hoped I would not be alarmed, since the place we had arrived at was nothing more than the celebrated locofoco 'nest number three,' the members of which had their head quarters at Tammany Hall and the Irving House, and were very respectable men, and good working politicians. A less inquisitive man than a citizen of Cape Cod is acknowledged to be, could not have failed to discover the artifice. But my enthusiasm carried away my discretion; and, after descending six slippery steps, we c
r by the fourteen stalwart fellows who lay stretched at full length upon half-emptied whiskey barrels, and seemed much devoted to shattered garments, disfigured faces, and collapsed hats. 'Here,' my friend said, 'is your true working politician, who has no fear of the infernal regions, and never thinks of heaven.' At a word from him, they rose to their feet, though not without an effort, and having given their hats an extra tip, and thrust their hands into places where pockets ought to have been, and let drop a few words of discontent, like my learned friend Easley once said Calypso did, they seized tumblers and ranged up to theay Bishop Hughes for praying a recently-deceased brother through purgatory, a service he never performed without feeling the money safe in his palm. All at once they set up a howl like midnight wolves, which so alarmed me that I hastened into the street, where my companion soon joined me, saying it was a way they had of expressing a joke. Not being accustomed to the ways of working politicians of the New York school, I
he services of a detective would do the rest. Just as we were debating this subject a well-dressed man advanced toward us, and, stooping down, picked up a corpulent pocket-book, with the possession of which he seemed not at all easy. 'Friend,' said the man, 'I am an honest Quaker, can'st thou tell me if thou art the owner of this, for I leave for my h