Bones in London

een her?" a

unconcern that Hamilton put down his pen

ory paper-knife. "She has one of those dinky bonnets, dear

iss Whitland enter the office half an hour b

stripes," said Bones dreamily, "and

y. "To what unhappy woman are you

e indignant Bones. "I'

ur

-handed way that a sudden millio

bought

s no

us," he said. "I thou

on on

slowly across the room wi

are you?" he said. "Is it one of those kind

smile, also rose from his d

, and waved his h

iately in front of the main entrance to the building. And undoubtedly there was a

ushion on the seat

ld myoptic," said Bones calmly; "t

lton. "You've a nerve to drive into

ugged his

nt of attention," he admitte

People thought you were advertising Pill Pellets for

ossed his legs and put

been taking lessons on the quiet, and to-day-proof!" He took out his pocket-book an

up," said Hamilton. "I

ble to drive a c

Crispley ("the big car that's made like a clock"). He became double pages with illustrations and handbooks and electr

when he had finishe

Bones. "Dear old scep

so f

y newspaper called the Flame. Apart from the losses he incurred during its short career, the experience was made remarkable by the fact that he became acquainted with Mr. Jelf, a young

ever speaking of Jelf at all, so there was pr

e, and he, too, had made the acquaintance of the Hindenburg Li

who had made him pay twice for an article because a receipt was lost, and that cost money. He exposed a man who had been very rude to him in the City. He would

had gone in for a general line of exposure which embr

had a column headed "What I Want to Know," and signed

or-car, and wears pink spats, realise that his treatmen

ticular occasion that there was only one lord in England who owned a sky-blue car

in unless he called in an ambulance-an instruction which afterwards filled him with a

d made its public appearance, and Bones sat

to the office, and he was in a maze of calc

s there was no answer, walke

ung man very earnest and very mysteri

Bones unfavourably "I though

room and closed the do

s little above a whisper, "

h the lift-man," said Bones. "He

examined

ay at three o'clock

ld writer," said Bones wi

smi

volunteered. "It's a scoop, and if it lea

Mr. Jelf well. "I thought i

"but you know how particular one has to be when one is de

s, wilfully dense, "especially h

mployment of the English language. "I don't worry about those poor funny thin

d Bones w

oked as

. "You in the heart of things

't want to know," said Bones,

n't know about L. next

"You really mustn't use Sunda

mself. It appeared that

the engagement had

neasily and loo

t," he said wearily, "and let us get

o Christian name, nor found such appendage necessary, since he was dead. He had invented a lamp, and that lamp had in some way come into Jelf's possession. He was

araging noise, bu

d lamp, plus properties which no lamp had ever had before, and it had none of the disadvantages of any lamp p

eak about myself, and I'm rather inclined to

noticed that

f, "that I want to see the ba

discover some drawback to the Tibbetts-Jelf Lamp, and how he had

d. "But the ingenious beggar who invent

a piece of Bones's priceless notepaper he sketched the front elev

et an ultra-violet ray as he was sneaking out of the lamp, and hit him violentl

ached the threshold of freedom he was tripped up, pounced

l done by

se on the table-cloth

d be alight to-morrow, and the next day, and so on. All the light-buoys and lightho

the hoop, or wherever homeward bound manners gathered, and would chant a psalm of praise

exhausted by his own eloquence, and Bones asked,

at Bones was the proprietor of a new motor-car, and thought motor-car and dreamed motor-car by day and by night. Even as it was, he was framing a conventional expression

d, "it will take

elf b

"Two of the lamps are just finis

hesi

said, "I should like, as an exp

ked at the other with very flattering interest

grown up with it. He knew its good points and none of its bad points. He thought the man who chose a car like that must have genius beyond the ordinary. Bones agreed. Bones had reached the conclusion that he had been mistaken about Jelf, and that possibly age had sobered him (it was nearly six months s

r apparently was, embedded in solid glass. Its principal virtue lay in the fact that it ca

ators, and Bones agreed to try the lamp for a week. He did more than this: he half promised to float a company for its manufacture, and gave Mr. Jelf fifty pounds on account of possible royalties and commissi

ley, ornamented, it seemed from a distance, by two immense bosses of burnished silver. On clos

dear old thing. Invented in leisure hours

Hamilton, wilfully dense-"in

. His explanation was disjointed and scarcely informative; for Bones had

unhappy pedestrian whom Bones had unexpectedly met on the wrong side of the road)-"never goes out, dear old thing. It's out now, I admit, but it's not in working order-Gosh! That

of a City policeman who was directing the traffic with his back turned

, and he had recovered something of his self-possession. "Next to stalking bu

es gratefully. "I'm n

I should use alone,"

e on the following day an invitation, couched in such terms as left him a lit

start at eleven o'clock, dear old Ham, and we'll lunch at what-you-may-call-

n curtly. "You may das

th you. I have too high

d Bones, "I've a good m

t me tell you the rest

here's a certain lady

-ha-

on wen

id; "we'll not discuss any

day in the country?

ra

he lady you mean, is certainly a friend of mine, but I have no control

ent on reflectively, ignoring the approaching apoplexy of his partner, "I suppose I'm one of the most confided-in persons in London. A gay old father

sed to unburden himself at that moment. In some mysterious fashion Bones, f

hotly. "You're not only an ass, but an ind

eyes, smiled, and

, dear old Ham," he mu

atula

, and as he addressed her as Vera, it was probably her name. In the course of the d

ay's motoring was not

wailed Hamilton. "He

the girl, "and I think it a

ggar upsets us in a ditch? I

," she said decisively, a

ing Hamilton

nks you for your i

e?" said Bones complac

, "will you be kind enough to remember not t

ld boy, don't be jea

ll that. Believe me,

ne

" said Hamilton with some acerbity. "But

o you mean,

etty rotten sort of p

somebody to go along

and was immens

aid unnecessarily loudly, "I w

t's an er," said Hamilton

lous one," said Bones tru

"Miss Whitland is a most charming girl,

e and wrung the other's h

k and discoursed upon the proper respect which all right-thinking young officers have for old typewriters. By the end of the week Hamilton had the confused impression that the very pretty girl who ministered to the l

ourth lecture

brigand like you, who dashes madly down from his mountain lai

usly, but Bones silenced

rascal like you it may

ose, is the word you ar

It sounds inexplicable that I can be interested in a platonic,

l," said Hamilton bluntly. "

s, horrified. "Ham, my dear old boy.

were men, who felt extremely awkward and showed it, and two of w

f without any sensational happening. It was an astonishment shared by thousands of men in similar circ

ed audibly under his breath at his error. "Not a bad old 'bus at all

ey?" said Vera, properly

atest eagerness-I mean to say, of course, that I'm looking forward to the other journey-I don't mean to say I

at herself by his side. He might have done this without explanation, but Bones

"Don't worry about me, dear old lad. A lot of people say you can see th

h it!" snar

fectly. It had been his secret intention to drive to Brighton; but nobody suspected this plan, or ca

usk; but long before the light had faded, the light which was sponsored by Mr. Jelf blazed whitely in the lamp that never went out. And when the dark came Bones purred with j

es over his shoulder, "what

I've never seen anything so miraculous. I can

wheel and coughed. As for Miss Marguerite Whi

a country road tree-sh

a little song-when

ithout so much as a warning flicker, that he was temp

Bones?" as

s. "I think the jolly old typewriter m

remembering that the key was well over on his

from left to right,

ordinary!"

said H

was a

ches off a little way

to take," said Bones w

e old signpost before

rite, you'd like to

ey went off together to investigate, leaving Hamilton to sp

They discovered the cross-roads, but Bones did not trouble to light his match. His heart was bea

on't think I'm an awful outsider and a

said a little faintly for

am a naughty old philanderer; but somehow, dear old mi

never went out came on again with extraordinary fierceness,

in a limelight, and were not only visible

e!" sai

for Bones, he climbed into the driver's seat with the deliberation of an old ge

road to

made no comment even when Bon

he lamp went out. It went out with as unexpected and startl

out, dear old Ham, and hav

milton drily. "We're

to get down, my jol

d Miss Marguerite Wh

e circumstances, dear old person,

, and the white road was an excellent wind-screen against w

-loving habits and took a constitutional. The occupants of the ear came to regard its

an because he had no light at all. Passing through Kingston, the lamp began to flicker, sending forth brilliant dots and dashes, which continued until they were on Putney Common, where th

(It was nearly twelve o'clock.) "I'm sorry you've had so

"I hope, when you saw me picking a spider off dear old M

was," said Hamilton, "that

. Now, as a man of the world, dear old blasé one, do you think I'd compromise an i

for the lady. Now, what are you going to do

at the glari

venomously. "If you think they will, my old eye-witness, how abo