Convenient Love

It was a very gloomy day in Florida, what a weird occurrence in the month nof July. I guess the weather had to match my mood, at least something was on my side today. 13th July 2013, the last day of high school, according to my dad I'm supposed to be excited. But how i could i?, how could i be happy that now i could no longer hide and i must face the world head on?, how could i possibly be happy when i would no longer see him again, i would no longer hear his voice and see his memerizing smile. Not that i could ever talk to him or even be the reason for his smile.

I always saw him from afar but at least that was enough. Today will be the last i get see any of it so i might as well get to school and enjoy evey moment. "Good morning princess, get ready quickly and come down i made breakfast" my dad announced loud enough for the whole neighbouhood to hear as he barges into my room smiling sheepishly. "Dad!", I groaned, "you ever heard of knocking". "Get up already,it's the last day, you should be excited ", my dad said while glaring at me, clearly irritated at my lack of enthusiasm "Okay dad", i yawned and stood up from bed as i tried to act as though i was just waking up, although I've been up since 4AM making different scenarios of what could possibly happen today. My dad left my room and i quickly entered the bathrom , washed my mouth and took a shower. When i was done with that,i put on a black oversized T-shirt and some biege baggy pants as this was my go to outfit all through high school. I consider myself pretty basic ,just like my name ,Liliy O'Sullivan I stood in front of the mirror taking in my features, My wavy long brown hair reached a bit below my waist. I have always loved my hair as it made it very easy for me to hide myself as it was so much and untamed, i have emerald green eyes that i got from my mum and a very curvy body that was always hidden behind my baggy clothes. I've hated my body every since I can remember as i have always been teased for it. I wish i was skinny like the girls in school, the girls that were always around him, maybe then that way he'll see me for once. I got my curves from my mum and she was the most beautiful person i had ever seen. Although she had always told me that I'm perfect, i just couldn't see it. Not when nobody wanted me or even wanted to be friends with me. My only friend was Tiffany Morgan. As i stood infront of the mirror, i did not even know when i had started crying, as i thought about my mum. All the memories and the times we spent together came flooding back into my memory. She passed away 3 years ago and every time i think about, it feels like it was just this morning i heard about the mortifying news . She died of stage four cancer. It was already to late to save her. Maybe if we had known earlier then she would still be here. At first i was just mad at her cause i thought she didn't fight to stay with me. But maybe i see why she no longer wants to remain in this world. It still hurts so much even after all the time, i can't seem to move on from it and even when i catch myself being happy at times, i feel guilty like I'm not supposed to be happy when she's not here. I had moved to full time wailing and crying hysterically when my father walked in and i jumped on him, needing his comfort."shh it's okay my princess, everything will be fine." He continued whispering sweet nothings to me until i stopped crying. "Do you think you could still make it to school today?", my father asked eyeing me cautiously. " it's the last day dad, i can't just stay home". I said while chuckling awkwardly trying to liven up the mood. "I'll be driving you to school today, I'll be waiting in the car", my dad said as he left my room. Usually Tiffany takes me school but recently I'm not so sure anymore, she's been hanging with her some girl she met at party once,who i didn't know until recently. When i had confronted her about it, she said they weren't really close and can not be even tagged as friends and i let it slide. Not until i found numerous pictures of both of them on Sasha's Instagram as it appeared that Tiffany had blocked me so i wouldn't see her posts. And yes i stalked Sasha, i needed to know something so i could be at peace. I asked Tiffany about the pictures but she brushed it off that it wasn't anything. She said that Sasha was grieving her dead sister that looked so much like her and that's why she has to put up with Sasha for a while. I let it go. Call me crazy or a narcissist like Tiffany had said but i don't want to share my best friend with anyone. Not that she couldn't have other friends but please Tiffany knew so much about me already that she could kill me if she wanted to so i can't take any chances. I quickly picked up my bag and ran down the stairs to the car. "You skipped breakfast again, i wonder if you'll eat at all when you go off to college". My dad had always complained about it but it's not like i had a choice. My bestfriend had mentioned that if i skipped breakfast then maybe I'd lose weight and no one would make fun of me. So that's what I've been doing. I ignored him and we drove to school in awkward silence. "Alright". The car comes to a stop. "We're here princess ". I quickly got down from the car but making no effort to walk towards my school. I just stood there and watched as my dad drove away not without waving frantically at me. When i could no longer see his car, i turned towards the school building where Bricks High school stood proudly. Judging from the old fashioned building construction and the messy blue paint covering the walls of the school, anyone could tell that Bricks High school was the oldest in town. I reluctantly walked into school, while trying to squeeze through happy students who were gossiping and chatting away with their friends. I guess not everyone is sad about today as i am. After successfully reaching my locker without tripping and falling on my face because of the many students that flooded the hallway, i checked the classes I'd be having today and brought out my books. Turning around, i was met with Tiffany. "Hey pumpkin, how are you doing this fine morning, are you excited for today, I'm sure you are, who wouldn't be". I just stood watching Tiffany blab about everything and whatever. Her long blond hair swayed with her every movement and her blue eyes seemed to shine brighter whenever she talks. She was wearing a pink mini skirt that stopped right under her ass, a tight black top that fit her nicely making it seem as though her perky boobs would spill out if she moved too much. She was also wearing a black jacket and some boots. She was sexy and she knew it. Not that we were allowed to dress like this to school but Tiffany is well, Tiffany. "Are you even listening to me, you're always zoning out and not paying attention to me". Tiffany whined as she stopped for a second to look at my outfit. "What are you wearing, didn't you get my text last night". Tiffany groaned. "I didn't get your text Tiffany". I lied, "we're all heading to the bar after school to celebrate, you can't go looking like this and then you wonder why everyone makes fun of you." Tiffany said. I didn't say a word , i couldn't do that. Tiffany was right, maybe i was the problem. I just stood there watching her quietly as she eyed me and walked out. Probably to her first class. She was pissed. I heard the bell and i hurriedly walked to my class, i didn't want to be late to maths. Mr frederick wouldn't let me hear the end of it. He was very strict. I got to class with a minute to spare. I picked a seat and sat down, immediately Mr frederick walked in with other students. The class begun and the whole day was a blur. I heard the last bell and i dashed out of the class, basically sprinting to my locker. Next thing i knew i tripped on my own feet and hurt my ankle Pained groans leave my lips as i try to hold on to the wall to steady myself. I'm aware that walls don't wear clothes but I'm pretty sure I'm touching one. Looking up to the wall, i freeze forgetting space, time and my entire existence as i take in the person before me. The feeling of his body makes my question every biology test I've written, because how can a human feel so much like a rock? Still lost in a daze, as it felt like time had slowed down specifically for me. Like it knew i needed to savour the moment. Standing infront me was Alexander Dankworth in all his glory. As always he looked like he was carved out of a magazine, wavy dark hair that looked as though a he had run his hand through them making it look messy but sexy at the same time. He grey eyes stare at me with some sort of mischief. I swear this boy is beautiful and then he smiles. At me?, his smile was directed to meeee?. I swear my skip eight beats at once. They might as well call an ambulance.