I loved Song Ciyan for three years, until his white moonlight, Jiang Xue, returned to the country. Only then did I realize that I was merely a substitute. I proposed to break up. Song Ciyan thought I was being unreasonable, his face full of impatience. "Shishi, stop making a scene. I have nothing with Xiaoxue." "I only see her as a sister." But at the banquet, he held her by the waist, acting intimately, completely ignoring me. It wasn't until after I passed away that Song Ciyan knelt before my tombstone, his eyes red, looking as if he had gone mad.
I loved Ryan for three years, but it wasn't until his first love, Millie, returned to the country that I realized I was just a stand-in.
I suggested we break up.
Ryan thought I was being unreasonable, his face full of impatience. "Mia, stop it. There's nothing between Millie and me." "I only see her as a little sister."
Yet at the party, he held her by the waist, acting intimately, completely ignoring me.
It wasn't until after I died that Ryan, with red eyes, knelt before my tombstone, looking deranged.
1.
I prepared a table full of dishes and sent a message to Ryan. "Ryan, what time will you be back tonight?" "I made your favorite boiled shrimp."
The message went unanswered.
Ding.
I quickly picked up my phone, but it wasn't Ryan who had messaged me. It was his friend, Aidan, who sent me a photo. "No matter how convincing a replica is, it can never replace the real thing."
In the photo, Ryan was holding a suitcase with one hand, looking tenderly at the woman beside him. The woman, dressed in a white dress, was holding onto Ryan, a smile on her lips.
Her appearance... bore some resemblance to mine.
I stared blankly at the photo, Ryan's expression unfamiliar to me. It was a tenderness I had never seen directed at me.
Not long after, a message from Ryan popped up. "I'll be back late today, don't wait up." Short and straightforward, without even a greeting.
I walked to the dining table, served myself a bowl of rice, and swallowed it along with my tears. The mixture of sourness, sweetness and bitterness made the food taste bland and unappetizing.
2.
I was once assigned to Ryan's company to be in charge of a project.
On the day when I met him for the first time, the look in his eyes as he looked at me was full of surprise and unexpectedness.
"What's your name?" He asked.
I knew he was the company president, so I gently shook the hand he extended
and respectfully replied, "Mia."
"That's a lovely name." He praised.
His words
made me blush.
Because of work, I often had to visit his company. Whether by coincidence or not, I always seemed to run into him.
A feeling called affection began to spread in my heart.
Two people who should have had no connection were bound together by money. My grandmother was seriously ill and urgently needed a large sum for surgery. I was frantic, trying to gather the money. Ryan showed up and paid the surgical fee for me.
After that, he often took me to events.
We lived together like an ordinary couple for three years.
I had been always waiting, waiting for the day when I could find my way into his heart. But before I could wait until that day, the person who was truly supposed to be by his side showed up. All dreams must end eventually.
3.
In the early hours, Ryan returned, chilled from the cold night air.
I rubbed my eyes and sat up from the sofa. When I walked up to his side and took off his overcoat for him, I smelled a light fragrance of perfume. The cold touch sent a shiver down my spine. Ryan never wore perfume.
"Didn't I tell you to rest early?" he asked, frowning as he looked down at me.
"I was just scrolling through my phone on the sofa and accidentally fell asleep."
"Okay, go wait for me in the bedroom."
Soon, the sound of water came from the bathroom. I lay on the bed, torn about whether to ask him about the photo. But how should I bring it up? Would he think I was being petty?
While I hesitated, the bed sank beside me. Ryan pulled me into his arms from behind. Through the thin fabric, I could feel his warmth and heartbeat. The atmosphere gradually grew more and more ambiguous.
Ryan bit my earlobe and whispered, "Mia."
His hand slipped under my shirt, his breathing growing heavier. My mind was in turmoil, and I pushed him away reluctantly. "Ryan, I'm a bit tired today. Let's turn in early."
It was the first time I refused him in matters of intimacy.
Ryan stared at me for a moment, then kissed my brow and eyes before turning away to sleep with his back to me.
Ryan loved my eyes and brows, sometimes kissing them, sometimes sketching them. It turned out it was because they resembled those of the woman in the photo.
The breathing beside me gradually steadied.
I gazed at the moon outside the window, feeling melancholic, unable to sleep all night.
4.
The next day at work, my boss said there was a Mitchell Group banquet I needed to attend.
"Why didn't Ryan mention there was a banquet today?"
I wondered, puzzled. Previously, he would always ask me to be his date for such events. Soon, I got my answer.
In the crowd, I immediately spotted Ryan and the woman beside him in a long dress.
The man was in a suit, looking mature and composed. The woman wore a custom gown, elegant and noble.
I understood why Ryan hadn't informed me; he no longer needed me. Ryan intimately held the woman's waist, smiling as he introduced her to everyone.
When he saw me, his expression paused, then returned to normal. "Millie, this is the project leader from L Company, Mia."
These words clearly defined our relationship. "And his girlfriend," I added at the right moment.
The woman's outstretched hand froze for a moment.
"Miss Lambert, hello, I'm the project manager at Mitchell Group, Millie. Thank you in advance for your kind assistance."
Stay calm. Stay calm.
I pinched my thigh to suppress the bitterness in my heart, forcing a strained smile as I shook her hand. "Miss Graham, nice to meet you."
I noticed a black mole at the corner of Millie's eye, just like mine. I also caught a familiar scent of perfume.
Millie withdrew her hand and intimately linked arms with Ryan. "Ryan, why didn't you mention you had a girlfriend?" She finished with a raised eyebrow, glancing at me.
Ryan looked at me with a complex expression. "Nothing worth mentioning."
His brief words were like daggers. Even a dog that I have raised for three years would know to rub against my legs.
In the midst of the standoff, Aidan appeared. He glanced at me coldly, then placed a hand on Ryan's shoulder. "Mr. Douglas is here, waiting for you over there."
Ryan frowned and pushed him away. "You reek of smoke," he said, pulling Millie closer behind him.
"You forgot Millie's lungs aren't good."
So, he wasn't indifferent to everything. For instance, he protected Millie behind him.
Ryan gave me a deep look, opened his mouth to say something, but was pulled away by Millie.
5.
I accompanied the manager to meet several clients.
After several toasts, I excused myself to get some fresh air.
I didn't know when Aidan appeared behind me. "Have you seen the real deal?" "After three years of hogging, it's time to let go, isn't it?"
"Aidan, seeing your beloved circling another man can't feel too good, can it?"
The night breeze was slightly cool. I wrapped my coat tighter around me, ignoring the person jumping up and down behind me.
Around nine in the evening, the banquet was close to the end.
"Miss Lambert, need a ride?" Millie asked, rolling down the car window from the passenger seat.
I looked up, meeting Ryan's gaze.
Our eyes locked.
He said, "Millie isn't feeling well, I'll take her home."
"Alright, be safe on the road."
I clenched my fists tightly, my nails digging into my flesh. Only the pain could help me maintain the calmness needed to say those words.
"See you tomorrow." Millie tossed the words over her shoulder, her eyes filled with smugness.
The car started and disappeared into the night. I stood there, stunned, inhaling the exhaust fumes as an overwhelming wave of pain engulfed me. The manager drove me home, and the house was shrouded in darkness.
Around eleven, Ryan returned, carrying a small cake.
"Mia, I brought you some dessert."
I opened my eyes, my gaze falling on the cake.
Every time he tried to appease me, he would bring a cake, always from the same shop.
"What is your relationship with her?"
"Millie grew up with me, she's like my little sister."
"Don't overthink it, there's nothing between us."
He scooped some cream and held it out to me. Just one bite and I couldn't eat anymore. It was so greasy that it made me feel like vomiting.
6
Ryan leaned in, pressing down on me. His passionate kiss met my lips.
Seeing me unmoved, he looked at me with some unease.
"Mia, there's really nothing between us, trust me, okay?"
With that, he lifted me onto the bed, deftly undoing my clothes.
I didn't resist anymore, instead, I responded to him eagerly. I bit and kissed his neck like crazy.
Ryan let out a muffled groan, his eyes filled with the flames of desire. "Mia, I never knew you had this kind of hobby." My response to him was one outburst after another.
In the morning, I lay limp on the bed, whining and unwilling to get up. Ryan gently kissed my brow and eyes. "Sleepyhead, , you're going to be late for work."
It was rare to have breakfast made by Ryan, even if the fried eggs still had bits of shell in them.
Was this his way of showing goodwill? My heart fluttered a little.
I helped Ryan straighten his outfit, picking up a bottle of cologne and spraying it on his shirt.
The fresh scent of oranges was much more pleasant than that unknown fragrance.
Before leaving, I grabbed Ryan's hand.
"Can you take me to work today?"
"Be good, you go ahead. I promised Millie yesterday that I'd pick her up and take her to your company today."
Seeing my face fall, he added, "Millie just returned to the country, she's unfamiliar with everything."
The mood, which had just turned better because of him. turned gloomy again.
"Go ahead. Have a safe trip." I smiled at him.
7
I arrived at the company and organized the materials needed for the meeting.
"Mia, I heard there's a new person in charge at Mitchell Group. Have you met?"
"I have, she's very beautiful."
As we chatted, the company was abuzz with activity.
Ryan arrived with Millie. I reported the project progress, future plans, and other information to Ryan. "From now on, Millie will be in charge of this project. You can report directly to her."
"Alright."
After all, he's the big client, or rather, now it's Millie, a new big client.
I can't afford to offend either of them.
After listening to the report, Millie frowned and clicked her high heels as she walked forward. "Miss Lambert, I think there are many shortcomings in your work." "First..." "then..." "Second..." "And..."
The atmosphere in the meeting room was tense.
I smiled and met Millie's gaze directly.
"Ms. Graham is right, I'll make the changes."
The red marks on Ryan's neck and I had sprayed same orange-scented perfume today. Millie must have noticed, which is why she deliberately made things difficult for me.
And Ryan, my boyfriend, only said lightly, "Do as Millie told."
I became the butt of everyone's jokes.
"Isn't our manager, Ms. Lambert, supposed to be Mr. Mitchell's girlfriend?"
"Why is Mr. Mitchell so protective of Millie?"
Colleagues in the break room gossiped, but fell silent when they saw me.
"It's okay, keep talking, don't mind me."
Even though I had anticipated this day, I couldn't help but feel sad.
It felt like my heart was being constricted by thorny vines, the veins on my forehead throbbing.
8
Back home, I was physically and mentally exhausted. I threw myself onto the bed and fell into a deep sleep.
I dreamed of the scene where I confessed to Ryan. Three years ago, I mustered the courage to hug him from behind.
"I love you."
Ryan turned around, trapping me in his arms, pinching my waist as he kissed me, full of desire.
He didn't say he liked me, nor did he reject me, and so we began, muddled and confused.
I also dreamed of my late Grandma.
After my parents divorced, neither wanted me. Only my Grandma cherished me like a treasure. She always said, "My dear, you've had it tough all these years."
But she had it much tougher. She raised me single-handedly, enduring hardships. I grew up, but she grew old.
Just after my graduation ceremony, I received a call from a neighbor saying my Grandma was hospitalized. Fortunately, she was saved in time.
After that, I brought her to live with me and hired a caregiver to look after her. Life was tough, but as long as she was well, I didn't mind working eight jobs.
It never rains but it pours. God always loves to play jokes on me.
When my Grandma fell seriously ill again, I stayed by her bedside day and night. My life revolved around the company, the hospital, and my rented apartment. I begged everyone I knew but still couldn't gather enough for the surgery.
Until Ryan helped me pay for it. But even then, I couldn't save my grandmother.
9
In my sleep, Ice - cold fingers stroked my cheek and wiped away my tears for me.
"Grandma, I miss you so much."
I murmured, hugging the person beside me.
When I opened my eyes, it was Ryan. I thought he wouldn't come back tonight.
"Had a nightmare?"
His warm breath tickled my face. I sniffled.
"Ryan, will you leave me?"
"I won't."
The man who said he wouldn't leave spent the next day shopping with his childhood sweetheart. That day was my Grandma's death anniversary.
In the past few years, Ryan would accompany me to worship and pay my respects. This year, it was just me.
I bought a bouquet and placed it in front of the tombstone, kneeling down to pour out my grievances. "Grandma, his true love has returned."
"I don't want to like him anymore, it hurts so much here." I pounded my chest.
"If only I had known I was just a stand-in, I could have left more easily."
"Grandma, I miss you so much."
"Really, miss you so much."
If my Grandma were still here, she would gently wipe away my tears with her calloused hands. "My dear, don't cry. If anyone bullies you, Grandma will stand up for you."
Then she'd pretend to pick up a broom from the yard, waving it in the air. "No one can bully my precious granddaughter."
I went to the bank and deposited some money. Just a little more, and I could repay Ryan. Then, we would owe each other nothing.
Other books by shuyu
More