Doesticks, What He Says

oarding

op of his lofty perch where he roosts in unreachable security, to crow over neighboring boroughs, and exult in the great glory of the Manhattan Island. It required, however, but a few days to weary of the "const

down the bed-clothes; a waiter meets you at the door, another takes away your overcoat and gives it to a waiter who presents you with a brass check for it-there are waiters in the bar, in the washroom, in the barber-shop, in the cellar, in the readin

take every M. P. for a foreign ambassador, and pull off my hat to the Star,

t, a fixture in this high old town, it became necessary to search out a fit habitation, wherein I might eat, sleep,

ogether on a voyage of discovery. To describe all the dilapidated gentlewomen, whose apartments we inspected-all the many inducements which were used to pe

nchor in the domicile of an Irish lady with one eye. She assured us that her boarders were

ooms, and resignedl

ch came off in my tea)-that the bread was scant-the butter powerful-the tea, "on the contrary, quite the reverse,

been Sebastopol itself I could not have been attacked with

cross my mind-a last thought of cherished home and absent friends was in my heart, and with a hasty prayer for mercy and forgiveness, was at the point of yielding, when my frantic eye caught sight of my cast-iron boot-jack. With an exclamation of pious gratitude to heaven, (Bull Dogge says it did not sound so to him), I seized it, and with the desperate strength of a dying man I renewed the battle, and eventually came off victorious and triumph

of beef, (Bull Dogge asserts that it was the fossil remains of an omnibus horse)-it was not molested; at dinner it made its appearance again, still it was not disturbed; at tea fragments of it were visible, but it yet remained untouch

still was forced upon our notice this omnipresent beef; it went through more changes tha

rth he growled audibly; the fifth he had an hour's swear to himself in his own room; the sixth, seventh,

men. For a month longer we ran the gauntlet of all the model boarding-houses. We were entrapped by all kinds of alluring promises, and perpetually swindled without any regard to decency; we had a t

find a decent place to feed?" Echo answered, "In the eating-houses." We resolved to try it,

ear,) ye immortal, everlasting beef; farewell to sloppy coffee and to azure milk (Damphool says, not yet); farewell ye antediluvian pies, and you lilliputian puddings; farewell you two-inch napkins, and ye holy table-cloths; farewell ye empty grates and rusty coal-scuttles; farewell ye cracked mirrors which make a man look

st remarkable fact

own viands, where the beef is positively tender, where there are no little red ants in the suga

uthin' shorter;" where we can eat when we please, and call for what we please; whe

taken our daily bread (beans and butter included) fo

friend, Thomas P

orever, our

ast, and our Res

tation is not strictly correct,