HEAR THE FOOTSTEPS BEFORE the voice. It's my cue to jump up off my bed and lock my door before she gets too close. "Quinlan! Where are you?" I love my mom to itty bitty pieces, but if I have to sit through another one of her lectures on proper role-modeling, I'm going to move out. I swear to God, I'll do it. Now that Teagan, my best bud in all the land, has her own apartment, I actually have options. The fact that she always declines to take me up on my roommate offers means nothing. I can wear her down; I always do. Nobody's a match for my determination. No one. "Quinlan?" My mom checks the door. "I know you're in there. Listen, I need to talk to you about Jersey." My little brother. One of the three siblings I'm supposed to be setting an example for. Luckily, he's the only one still around much anymore. The twins are way too busy with their social lives to bother with family much. "I'm busy, Mom!" I shout through the door. "Homework!" "You're out of school and you're not taking summer courses. Open up." Little does she know, I actually am in the middle of a big project. But I'm going to keep that information to myself because I know what her reaction will be. I get up and crack the door open. "Mom, seriously. I'm working on some financials right now and I need to focus." "Financials? For what?" "Just a project one of my ... uh ... professors gave me at the end of the semester. Extra credit stuff." She frowns. "How are you going to get extra credit for a class that already ended?" I roll my eyes and huff out an annoyed puff of air, as if she's the stupid one. "Mom, would you give me a break, please? It's not like I'm smoking crack in here or anything. I'm working." "Jersey ate another chapstick." I smile. "Jersey has a very versatile palate, what can I say? You should be proud he's so out of the box." She puts her hands on her hips. "Jersey is going to get poisoned one day with you leaving your crap all over the house. I need you to be more adult about how you conduct yourself where he's concerned." "Mom, I'm twenty-two. I am an adult." "Adults don't leave things around for babies to put in their mouths." "Mom. Jesus. Wake up and smell the coffee. Jersey is twelve years old and obviously as dumb as a box of rocks. Time to stop blaming me for his half- a-brain." I shut the door in her face and lock it again. I dance a little jig of glee and high-five myself because I know my choice of words is going to light her butt on fire. She knows I don't mean them and that I'd lay down my life for the little turd, but it doesn't mean I'm above yanking her chain whenever and however I can. Hot button ... pressed. Whoop! "Quinlan! Open this door!" "I will if you stop riding my butt." "Open it." "I'll tell Dad." There's a pause as she considers her next move. We both know what'll happen if I drag him into the mix. He's under no illusions that my little brother is going to be the next brain surgeon on the block. The kid'll be lucky to graduate the sixth grade, and everyone's on board with that fact, with the exception of my mom. And my father is not a huge fan of her always blaming everyone else for Jersey's bullcrap, so she tends to do it out of his presence whenever possible. "You better be getting a lot of extra credit on that project," she finally says. "Oh, I am. Believe me." I'm going to help my best friend get her damn inheritance back if it's the last thing I do this summer. "I need you to take Jersey to his doctor's appointment later." "What time?" "Two o'clock. I have to go see his therapist and come up with another plan for him. I don't think he's responding very well to the one we have in place right now." "Fine, I'll do it. Now leave me be so I can concentrate." "Quinlan?" Her sad voice makes me open the door. "Yes, mommy dearest?" I grin to take the sting out of our conversation. "Don't call me that. I just wanted to ask you, in a calm and rational voice, to please be more careful about leaving tempting things out in the open where your brother can get his hands on them." I lean out of the doorway with my lips puckered up to get a kiss. When she caves and gives me one, I smile. "Don't worry, Mom. When I'm rich and famous I'll pay to put him in a nice home." I pull my head in and lock the door before she can get to me. "Quinlan! That's not funny!" "Yes it is," I say, going back to my bed. She and I both know I'd never do that, even if it would make everyone's life a hell of a lot easier. My brother Jersey has the energy of three boys his age and only a very small percentage of their brain power, thanks to an accident on his way out of the birth canal. He's hell on wheels, but we love him to death. The little shit is probably going to be my roommate when my parents get too old to handle him. And when that happens, I'm goi
Chapter 1 Mother fucker
HEART NEARLY LEAPS OUT of my chest when the big boom hits.
When I can breathe again, I jump from my bed and run to the door, opening it
up. I expect to find complete disaster on my doorstep, but instead I just find
Jersey in a pile, wearing a cape from three Halloweens ago. It's way too small,
but does that stop him? Hell no. He'd still be in his toddler-sized Ninja Turtle
underwear if our mom hadn't thrown them out last year. Jersey has a hard time
letting go of the things he loves.
He falls into my room, his head landing on my feet. "Hi, Sister," he says,
looking up at me, his expression pure innocence and mostly blank. He almost
never smiles.
"What are you doing, Jersey?"
"Being invisible."
I sigh heavily. "Could you please go be invisible somewhere else? I'm
really busy right now."
"Can you see me?" he asks, getting up on all fours and dog-walking into
my room. He crawls under my desk and pulls the chair in as far as he can,
trapping himself behind the legs.
"Nope. You're totally invisible. Where are you? In the kitchen? Oh,
what a great idea. Why don't you go to the kitchen?" I shut my door and go
back to my bed, sitting against my headboard and putting my laptop back on my
legs.
"Dad said he can see me."
"Dad's a damn liar." I tap away at the keys, putting another bulleted point
on the list of things I want the lawyer to see.
"Dad's a damn liar," he says. "Dad's a damn liar."
"That's what I said. Don't wear it out."
"Dad's a damn liar."
I ignore him. It's the only way to get him to shut up. He gets wound up
with too much attention paid to him.
"Mom's a damn liar."
I can't help but grin. "You should go tell her that."
"I'm not stupid, you know," he says.
I look up to find him frowning at me.
"No one said you're stupid. I've said you have half a brain, but that's only
an expression."
"What does it mean?"
I sigh, feeling just a touch guilty. "It means you're awesome cuz you're
not like other lame kids. Now can I please do my work?"
"Dad's a damn liar," he says.
"Yeah, I know."
"So is Mom. Mom's a damn liar."
"Yep."
"I'm gonna go tell her." He crawls out from under the desk. "I'm gonna
go tell her right now."
"Good. Go tell her," I say absently, not really paying attention to him.
Another glitch in these stupid reports just jumped out at me and makes me want
to slap myself for not noticing it earlier. It's added another hour to an already
too-long project that I need to have done by four o'clock.
I'm alone for about five minutes before I realize that it's way too quiet in
the house. With four maniac kids and two loud adults at this address, it's never
ever this quiet, not even in the middle of the night. Jersey's a sleep-walking
maniac so we always have shit going on.
My brain alarm goes off when the only thing I can hear is my bedside
clock ticking. I didn't even know that thing did that.
"Jersey?" I look up and out into the little bit of hallway I can see from my
bed. No answer.
"Shit." I put the computer down and wander out of my room, fully
expecting my brother to be pressed up against a wall pretending to be invisible.
He can be very determined when he's in the mood. "Jersey? Where are you,
punk? Stop fucking around."
My other brother and sister are at camp, so they're nowhere around at this
time of the day.
"Jersey!"
No answer.
My blood pressure creeps up.
After a quick search, I realize he's not inside the house. I move out to the
backyard. Anxiety settles in as I come to the conclusion that he's not in his little
clubhouse or the shed. The only thing left is the front yard and then the great big
wide-open world out there, otherwise known as my mom's worst nightmare.
Jersey is ripe for the picking. Any kidnapper, molester, or run-of-the-mill
murderer would take one look at him and yell Bingo! Cha-ching! Come to papa!
For the first time in my life, I believe I'm getting a taste of what my mom
deals with on a daily basis, and I don't like it one bit.
"Jersey!" I scream, as I run down the front stairs and out into the yard.
"Where are you, Jersey?!"
Old lady Ludke from across the street waves at me frantically and then
points to the side of her house. Putting her finger to her lips in a shushing
gesture, she smiles.
My heart-rate drops in half. Fucking Jersey. Thank God we have
understanding neighbors. Living in the same place for twenty years has its benefits.
I storm across the street, waving to her as I pick up the pace and jog over to
the side of her house. Jersey's there, his back pressed into her bushes, staring off
into space.
Invisible, my ass.
There are two ways I can handle this. The first is tempting, where I grab
him by the arm and drag him back home, lecturing him the entire way about
giving me a damn heart attack. The other is more of a pain in the ass, but seeing
him standing there with that ratty-ass cape over one shoulder and dirt smudged
across his cheek is just too much. I'm left with no choice.
I look away instead of manhandling him and stare off into the back yard.
"Jeeeeerseeeeey? Where aaaare youuuuuu?" I walk right past him towards
Mrs. Ludke's back yard.
He giggles, but I keep going.
"Jeeerseeeyyy! I can't see you if you're invisible! You have to talk to
me! I don't want you to get left outside all day!" The evil part of my
personality decides to join in the fun. I'm never one hundred percent angel,
ever. "I'd hate for that lion that's been roaming around the neighborhood to find
you when he's hungry. You know how much they like to eat little boys."
The leaves in the bushes rustle as I reach the gate leading to the backyard.
"I'll check this yard and then I guess I'll have to call the police. And the animal
control people, just in case the lion is nearby."
Little footsteps come up behind me, but I pretend to be busy with the gate
latch.
"Boo!" he yells, poking me in the back with a pointy finger.
"Ack! Mother fucker!" I spin around and grab for him, but he's too fast.
He takes off, shrieking the entire way, across the neighbor's lawn and ours
He takes off, shrieking the entire way, across the neighbor's lawn and ours
too before disappearing inside the house.
I'm out of breath as I follow behind, half of my energy spent waving to
Mrs. Ludke, the other half getting control of my heartbeat.
Ten minutes later I've finally got him locked in my room with me and
happy enough to settle down and let me work.
"Tastes good," he says, licking his lips.
"Yeah. Yummy. Just don't bite it. Put it on, lick it off. That's how it
works. That's how the cool kids do it."
He lifts the grape chapstick to his lips. "Put it on ...," he smears it all
around his mouth about ten times, "...lick it off." The licking part is kind of
nasty, but as long as I don't look directly at him, I'm fine.
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