Giselle had to protect her dreams. For years, Giselle Sidney had been in love with Alpha Caden Einsworth, who she knew would never fall for her. As she came of age, she found out that he was her mate. But he was in love with her older sister, Greta who was already engaged to one of her father's business partners and a huge competition to Caden's underground businesses. On the night of Greta's engagement, Giselle found Caden so drunk that she decided to help him get back to his condo. Caden and Gisselle were so heartbroken that night that they found comfort in each other until their emotions brought them to a situation that wasn't supposed to happen. They shared one, passionate night and that changed Giselle's life forever. To hide the huge scandal from her family, Giselle decided to leave the Grimfur pack and became a Rogue to raise her pup alone. But after a month of his disappearance, Alpha Caden came back to take full responsibility for the child. Giselle never wanted to force him into a situation when she knew he was still in love with her sister. She couldn't bear to be with a cold-hearted werewolf whose heart belonged to another girl. Will fate find a way to make their bond stronger? Will Giselle's pride stop her from accepting Alpha Caden when he starts to slowly fall for her? Or will she run away like she always does?
Tears rolled down my face.
My life was over.
I smoothed the crumpled bedsheet beside me, sniffing the last of his scent on the pillow he used. I closed my eyes tight as I tried hard not to sob. I could feel my throat swelling. My heart was racing. How could such a wonderful thing end so easily and then plummet to the brink of sadness and despair? What would I do after all that happened?
Even though my inner wolf was feeling awful, she made sure to hide deep within me so as not to add to my already heavy emotional load.
Sobs emerged from my throat. I embraced the soft cashmere blanket against my bruised skin. Every inch of me was aching. My eyes caught the blood stain on the bedsheet, making me shudder in pain. Not just physically. I thought my heart was already numb from all the heartbreaks I suffered while loving him. However, because of my own foolishness, the events that happened between me and him became a profound wake-up call.
He will never be yours, Giselle. I whispered inside my head. I had already exhausted all possibilities, leaving only the bitter truth I could taste at the back of my tongue.
I was never enough. I will never always be enough.
I bit my lower lip hard. I bit my lower lip so forcefully that I nearly tasted blood, causing a sudden surge of anger in my chest. It burned the miserable feeling in me and acted like gasoline that pumped throughout my veins, urging me to go out of bed and snatch all my clothes from the floor. In his room, I was totally alone. He left me without a word, and I thought it was okay. I thought it would be better if I didn't have to see his face once I left his condo unit and disappeared from his life forever.
I put my clothes on with anger and shivering fingers, and I checked my face in the mirror first. My eyes were puffy red, and there were bruises visible on my arms and the right side of my neck. Last night was wild and intoxicating. Blissful and thrilling. But then morning came, and everything turned bleak and awful, and I just wanted to forget every bit of memory of it.
But it did happen. Every second of it was tattooed on my head, causing the tears to run freely down my pale cheeks. The delicious sound of his voice when he whimpered my name. His touch made me feel so delicate and weak. I felt like I was melting butter under his flawlessly sculpted body. He was so handsome. It was as if the gods had molded him into perfection, and no woman could ever resist the animal magnetism of that man!
I shut my eyes tight.
Well, perhaps not my sister, who had a stone for a heart. But it was aggravating that I was not exempted from being a crazy girl who fell in love with a man like him.
"Screw you, Caden!" I snarled under my shivering breath, then punched the mirror with all my strength, only to channel the pain away from my heart and down to the bleeding knuckles of my small hands.
I could feel the weight of the world falling on my shoulders.
***
[One month later.]
"No, Madelyn. I can't go out tonight! I have to finish this project before the deadline, okay?" I kept my voice calm as I talked to my best friend, Madelyn, over the phone. I met her two years ago at an art viewing in one of the city's museums. She had been insisting on taking me out of the house since last week because, apparently, I now have a habit of imprisoning myself inside my small, old apartment full of canvasses, dirty paintbrushes, and tin cans of paint.
Yes. I sell paintings for a living.
"You have been sick for days, Giselle. You have to get out of your small den and breathe some fresh air, for goddess' sake! I am scared your brain has already melted with the fumes of those paint chemicals!"
I poured black coffee on my mug and smiled despite my friend's anxious voice. She was always overprotective of me. I owe her a lot after I ran away from the pack and home. "Tomorrow. I swear. I am feeling great today, so I will pour all this positive energy into my work and finish it before the deadline. Then I'll treat you to a nice cup of coffee this weekend. Is that good?" I made my voice as cheerful as possible and then took a small sip.
The bitter drink spread all over my mouth, and I almost gagged at the taste. Madelyn heard me and then went into total panic. "Giselle?! Are you alright?! What happened?"
"I'm fine. It's just the coffee. I forgot the sugar and cream." I lied to her. The coffee was fine. I just couldn't understand why my stomach didn't want it anymore when I used to drink it every morning. "See you later, Madz."
Before she could even speak again, I hung up the phone and placed the mug on the small wooden dining table. I went straight to the toilet and opened the medicine cabinet. There was a force telling me to open it and take something from it.
I felt like my heart crawled up to my throat.
"Maybe I am just paranoid," I whispered to myself, but I still took the small white packet. I looked at myself in the mirror and moved sideways, focusing my eyes on my tummy. Then I touched it. I felt it on the palm of my hand, with a scared feeling in my chest.
It couldn't be.
"It was just a one-night thing! No one gets pregnant like that," I uttered in a shaky voice, my eyes full of dread as I looked at my face in the mirror. I was too scared to know the truth. I was not ready.
I put the packet of pregnancy tests on the sink, thinking about throwing it in the trash. But then, with shuddering fingers, I took it and tore the plastic packaging.
"There is only one way to find out." I breathed desperately, trying to find the courage to do it. My heart was fast, beating wildly against my chest, and I could hear it inside my ear as it throbbed. Softly at first, and then it became louder and louder until I couldn't hear anything but the thumping of my own heartbeat.
Ba dum, ba dum, ba dum.
Each second that I anxiously stayed inside the toilet made me want to scream. I watched how the red line on the test kit appeared. I held my breath for as long as I could. As if breathing would make the scariest result appear right in front of me.
And it did.
"F*CK!!!" I yelled at the top of my lungs and threw the pregnancy kit on the other side of the tiled wall. "No! This isn't happening... THIS. IS. NOT. HAPPENING!"
No. No. No. No. No!
I heard a loud knock on the door, but I was too weak to go and open it. I sat on the toilet bowl while cold sweat beaded my forehead. I was so confused. I couldn't believe that one night of mistakes could create something inside me that fast.
I didn't know if I could raise a child now that I had removed myself from my former pack. I had no one to help me now but my best friend Madelyn, who I was sure would faint once she found out about the truth. About what actually happened.
About how Alpha Caden just disappeared like a ghost after he took my virginity that night at my sister's engagement party.
Chapter 1 Red Lines
02/04/2024
Chapter 2 A Mistake
02/04/2024
Chapter 3 Steel Heart
02/04/2024
Chapter 4 The Einsworth Manor
02/04/2024
Chapter 5 How to Annoy an Alpha
02/04/2024
Chapter 6 What He Only Cares
02/04/2024
Chapter 7 Pain and Disappointments
02/04/2024
Chapter 8 Fears
02/04/2024
Chapter 9 The Night When You Were Mine
02/04/2024
Chapter 10 Love, Hate and Rejections
02/04/2024
Chapter 11 Madz
04/04/2024
Chapter 12 Small Kicks
04/04/2024
Chapter 13 Doubts and Hesitations
04/04/2024
Chapter 14 Where Do I Belong
04/04/2024
Chapter 15 Mall
04/04/2024
Chapter 16 Love and Anger
04/04/2024
Chapter 17 Don't Let Her See You
04/04/2024
Chapter 18 The Regent Luna
04/04/2024
Chapter 19 Momster
04/04/2024
Chapter 20 The Garden
04/04/2024
Chapter 21 Love Should Exist
04/04/2024
Chapter 22 I Was The Problem
04/04/2024
Chapter 23 Hidden Feelings
04/04/2024
Chapter 24 Forgiveness
04/04/2024
Chapter 25 Family Secrets
04/04/2024
Chapter 26 The Gardener
04/04/2024
Chapter 27 Courage
04/04/2024
Chapter 28 Behind that Hill
04/04/2024
Chapter 29 Who was Otis
04/04/2024
Chapter 30 Tiny Black Box
04/04/2024
Chapter 31 To Make Her Mine
04/04/2024
Chapter 32 Paranoid
04/04/2024
Chapter 33 Not Meant To Be
04/04/2024
Chapter 34 Confirmation
04/04/2024
Chapter 35 Red Skimpy Dress
04/04/2024
Chapter 36 Motel
04/04/2024
Chapter 37 A Heart's Doubt
04/04/2024
Chapter 38 Complicated Feelings
04/04/2024
Chapter 39 Road Rage
04/04/2024
Chapter 40 The Missing Einsworth
04/04/2024
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