Moving on from Toxic Love

My boyfriend was exposed by a female celebrity on Twitter with an emotional essay.

There was even a video which showed that he held my waist entering a hotel, and left at dawn.

The star, Leanne, publicly announced their breakup, "Roderick, I have never thought that you are such a person."

The evidence was solid, and the netizens were all talking about it.

"Leanne is amazing!"

"When did they get together?"

"It's a pity. I think that they are good-looking and they are a perfect match..."

"Isn't anyone curious about who the woman in the video is?"

I put down my phone, feeling that everything was absurdly ridiculous.

Roderick and I had known each other since childhood and we had been together for eight years. Leanne was his official girlfriend?

What was I to him?

1

Less than half a day after Leanne exposed Roderick as a jerk, my personal information was found out by the netizens.

The paparazzi stood outside my company, and I had received countless harassing messages.

There were lots of rumors and malice about me.

I hid in the restroom, trying to call Roderick for countless times, but he had never answered.

I had no choice but to clarify things online.

"So you're saying that Leanne is the third party?

Are you okay?"

"You are so shameless. How dare you say that you are innocent?"

As an ordinary person, I didn't attract too much attention on Twitter. The few comments I had received were all cursing me.

There were more insults. Within half a day, I became the third party who was criticized by others.

I took a deep breath, planning to ask for a leave, but at this moment, I received a notification first.

"Sheri, your personal actions have caused serious problems to the company.

You can take some time off, and come back to work once you've dealt with your personal matters."

Just taking some time off?

After working for so many years, if I couldn't understand what they meant, I would be stupid.

My phone suddenly buzzed.

"Don't worry about anything. I'll send someone to pick you up."

It was Roderick.

I couldn't help thinking of Leanne's post. She talked about their story in detail. My heart skipped a beat.

I stared at the message for a few seconds, deciding to follow his arrangement. I had to confront him face-to-face.

Under the cover of a few people, I got into Roderick's van.

Roderick wasn't in the car. His agent gave me a cold glance.

"Stay at the hotel we've arranged for you and wait for Roderick's message."

I said nothing, turning to watch the scenery pass by. I unconsciously rubbed the watch on my wrist.

"Roderick has the same watch on your wrist," his agent suddenly spoke.

"You've been together for almost eight years, right?"

She was indifferent. "Every Valentine's Day, he will buy a pair of customized watches from abroad. He still cares about you."

I was taken aback, feeling stunned.

There was a reason Roderick and I wore watches.

As kids, we were not liked by the people in the neighborhood.

His mom left with someone else, abandoning her family.

His dad often beat him after drinking. Once he was badly hurt and he was even sent to the hospital.

I was an orphan, raised by my senile grandmother.

Whenever someone said that I was also mentally-ill, Roderick would stand up and fiercely punch him.

We really wanted to succeed. So we were the best students in the neighborhood.

That day, I was sick, and my grandmother forgot to turn off the gas while cooking porridge. Then it caused a fire.

Luckily, Roderick came to do homework with me and he discovered it in time. He calmly called for help.

But our wrists were burned.

After getting together, Roderick and I lived a poor life.

But on our first Valentine's Day, he saved up from part-time jobs to buy a pair of watches.

That night, he whispered in my ear and I felt the warm breath of him.

"Sheri, I'll make you live a good life."

Later, he was discovered by a talent scout, and his first drama made him become famous. He really made me live a good life.

Every Valentine's Day after that, he would give me a watch.

But this year, he didn't.

He didn't even spend Valentine's Day with me.

I prepared the dinner at home, waiting for him all night.

Where was he?

In Leanne's post, on Valentine's Day, the crew had just finished the film, and everyone was drinking to celebrate it.

The two of them sneaked out, like an ordinary couple, walking on the streets and visiting an amusement park.

On the ferris wheel, as it reached the top, Roderick, wearing a mask, tentatively kissed her.

She removed their masks and smiled, kissing him back.

2

I stayed in the hotel for two days.

During those days, I forced myself not to check the Twitter and didn't contact anyone.

On the third day, Roderick finally appeared.

I had a fever. I held the doorframe to drink water. When I looked up, I met Roderick's dark eyes.

He looked thinner and more rugged. He was dressed in black, standing there coldly.

I leaned weakly against the door.

Suddenly, I remembered that today was our eighth anniversary.

Last year, on our anniversary, Roderick was off duty. We planned to travel to Stusphia.

At the airport, we encountered the paparazzi.

We were saved by a female celebrity who happened to be there.

"Why is she here with Roderick?"

"Didn't she confess to Roderick last month?

Are they really together?"

The paparazzi came up to them, pushing me out of the crowd. They surrounded her and Roderick, taking photos of them.

The actress was good at creating stories to attract the attention. Her face immediately turned red, "The crew is on holiday and we're just out having fun together."

Roderick didn't deny it, and she deliberately leaned slightly against his chest. She seemed to be shy.

Roderick looked down at her. He smiled and he was so gentle now.

The airport became lively. People were all looking at them and talking about it. Roderick turned to look at me, his eyes full of apology.

That night, the hot topics were all about Roderick and that actress.

And me?

I wanted to post the photos of our trip on Twitter but I didn't dare to show the location, fearing that someone would find me, which would have a bad impact on him.

That night, Roderick held me tenderly, his chin resting on my head. He said firmly,

"Just wait a little longer, Sheri.

Next anniversary, I'll tell everyone you're my girlfriend."

3

Back to the present, I was about to say something when his agent suddenly appeared behind me. She searched me thoroughly before leaving.

"Are you afraid I have a recording device?"

Roderick acted as if nothing happened, smiling, "Sheri, I've missed you."

I suddenly wanted to laugh, but I was also helpless now.

After that anniversary, we had less chance to meet each other.

He was busy filming, attending events, and I kept telling myself to understand him.

One day, curled up on the sofa, I couldn't help but post on Facebook, saying that I wanted someone to accompany me.

To my surprise, when I opened my eyes, I saw Roderick.

He saw my post and came back overnight.

Seeing him at the door, I was overjoyed. I kissed him wildly.

He just laughed, slowly unbuttoning his shirt,

"I miss you too."

In the end, I held his arms, gasping like a fish out of water.

Because of the early shoot, Roderick left before dawn the next day.

I stood in the empty house, watching his figure disappear outside the window. Then I suddenly noticed that he had left his suitcase.

I opened it and found that it was full of my favorite snacks.

At the bottom was a photo.

It was a signed photo of a theater actor I liked very much.

I had heard from a fan on Twitter that Roderick had refused several gigs to study theater for three months.

It turned out that he did so for me.

Even later, when the rumors about him and Leanne were spread all over, I chose to believe him.

I really didn't know how Roderick and I ended up like this.

"About that Twitter and Leanne, aren't you going to explain?"

"What?"

"They all said that you fell in love with her on set. I have never doubted you. You said it was just for publicity, and I still believed you.

But what about now?

If you've really fallen for Leanne, just tell me directly. We can break up.

Why do you deceive me?

Do you feel excited when you have an affair with someone else?

Does it give you a sense of accomplishment?

Why put me in such a situation?"

Roderick looked at me without speaking.

"Do you know what I've been through these days?

Do you know what people online are saying about me?"

My throat tightened. I didn't want to say so. "Roderick, some of the slanders are said by you, right?"

Roderick's face darkened, but his voice remained calm, "Sheri, it's not what you thought."

I stared at him and didn't know what to say.

Roderick who once defended me was now looking at me scolded by others. He even added the fuel to fire.

Only when I attracted the attention of the netizens could his team have time to deal with the crisis.

Looking at him, I felt so exhausted. I didn't want to argue anymore. "Roderick, let's break up."

"I don't agree."

Roderick gripped my hand tightly, trying to touch my face, but I coldly avoided him.

"My feelings for Leanne..."

He was stunned. It seemed that he didn't know how to answer it. He lit a cigarette in frustration.

After a long silence, he finally spoke, "After that fire when I was young, I've been afraid of flames.

During the scene with explosions, I couldn't find the state, and she kept encouraging me.

In that film, our characters had a deep emotional entanglement. I've never been so immersed in a role.

I just...

I couldn't forget it for the time being."

He suddenly extinguished the cigarette. He frowned and he was a little annoyed.

Watching him, I suddenly laughed, "So you mean that you were just crushed and you have never had feelings for her?"

Roderick remained silent.

I stared at him, "Did you sleep with her?"

Roderick's face turned slightly pale.

"On Valentine's Day, I had been waiting for you all night. I tried to call you, but you didn't answer. You were with her, weren't you?"

Roderick looked at me silently. He moved his lips but said nothing.

Suddenly, a tickle in my throat made me cough violently.

He touched my forehead with his cold hand.

"Do you have a fever?"

Roderick frowned, picking up his phone to call someone, "I'll have someone bring you some medicine."

Noticing the faint worry on his face, I felt really uncomfortable. My stomach churned. I turned away, retching.

"Stop pretending. It's disgusting."

His face darkened. He stared at me for a few seconds, then suddenly pulled me to the sofa.

I tried to resist, but he moved his hands from my waist to my back, pressing me against his chest.

"Sheri."

He said with coldness, "You said you would never leave me, no matter what happened."

As he leaned in to kiss me, I struggled with all my might, "If you have any respect for me, let me go."

Roderick's body stiffened for a moment, then he released me.

"I'm sorry."

The room became quiet.

I looked at him, "I'll break up with you and won't send any of your information on the Internet.

But you must tell them the truth and prove that I am innocent."

After a moment, Roderick's Adam's apple bobbed, "I can't.

Sheri, I've already made a response. The public won't care about it for a long time. If you can make a compromise and wait for this matter to come to an end..."

"Make a compromise?"

I interrupted him, "What do you mean?"

I seemed to realize something. My hands trembled as I opened Twitter, which I hadn't dared to look at for a long time.

The hot topic was about Roderick's response.

"I'm sorry for taking up public resources, so I want to apologize here.

Sheri and I were indeed a couple, but due to some reasons, we had to break up.

Later, while filming, I decided to be with Leanne.

I realized the reason why she broke up with me when I met Sheri again.

She has a genetic disease in the family.

That night she came to me because she got ill. She mistakenly thought that we hadn't broken up.

It was dark at night. So there is the misunderstanding.

I apologize to Leanne for not telling her about it.

I feel sorry for Leanne. Sheri also feels sorry and she will clarify this matter to everyone when she comes to her senses."

I stared blankly at the screen.

"So, you came to me today...

To make me admit to everyone that I have mental diseases?

That I'm a crazy ex-girlfriend who are pestering you?"

Roderick's face darkened. "Sheri, Ryann will give you a script to clarify the matter. You have to memorize it, and she'll record a video for you.

When this matter is over, we can still be together as before..."

I slapped him on the face. The sound was crisp and loud.

I used all my strength, and Roderick turned his head to the side.

My nails left a long scratch on his face. The blood slowly oozed out.

The room was silent for a few seconds.

Roderick lowered his face, calmly holding my hand. He said gently, "Does your hand hurt?"

I didn't get rid of him. I just looked up and softly asked, "Do you know what day is it today?"

Roderick was stunned.

"Last year, on our seventh anniversary, you promised to announce to everyone that I was your girlfriend by the next anniversary."

I chuckled softly, "Today is our eighth anniversary.

You want me to announce to everyone that I have mental disease."

Roderick's face turned pale at once.

A year was not a long time.

Roderick and I helped each other and we had been together for eight years. But our relationship was destroyed in just one year.

He knew how much I feared being said that I had mental diseases because of my grandmother's condition.

He knew it.

Looking at the man in front me, I felt strange.

"Roderick, you're too arrogant.

You thought that I'd forgive your betrayal since I love you. You thought that I'd make a compromise to admit I'm crazy. Then I will still stay with you.

But why should I do it?

I loved the person who protected me from being bullied, who flew to see me despite a busy schedule, who prepared surprises for me and who had only me in his heart."

I looked at him calmly and said word by word, "Not the person who is so disgusting."

Roderick tightened his grip on my hand. His face was gloomy.

Slowly and resolutely, I withdrew my hand from his grasp.

"Not only will I not record any video, but I'll also find a reporter and tell everyone the truth."

"I suggest you think it over."

Ryann's voice came from behind.

Ryann met my gaze, raising the phone in her hand.

The screen of my phone was shattered.

"Sorry, I have to use some means to ensure your cooperation.

We'll compensate you with a new phone, but there won't be any chat records."

Ryann took a new phone from her bag and put it in my hand, "If you want to expose him, you can only prove that you didn't break up last year."

She smiled.

"When you stayed at the hotel, we've already handled all the things related to this matter.

It includes the gifts he has given to you this year and the tickets since January."

I looked at Roderick in disbelief.

His face turned pale. He awkwardly avoided my gaze.

After a moment of silence, I slowly spoke, "I have backups."

Ryann's face darkened.

"I've been in a relationship with him for eight years. I have backups of all our chat records and my tickets to visit him.

Of course, they're not on this phone."

I stared coldly at Roderick.

"My demands remain unchanged. You need to tell the truth on Twitter and publicly apologize to me. You have to maintain some dignity."

Roderick suddenly laughed, with a hint of sarcasm in his eyes. "Backups?"

I noticed his expressions. I felt so sad in my heart.

I grabbed my bag and turned to leave, pausing at the door. "You have two days to consider it."

5

Leaving the hotel, I held my aching head and hailed a taxi to the hospital.

When I was having an infusion, I opened Twitter and scrolled through the comments under Roderick's Twitter.

The first comment was from Leanne, "Really?"

Roderick replied to her, "Yes."

The second comment said, "I admit that I had made a mistake back then. Since you are so good to your ex-girlfriend who has mental diseases, you're definitely not a jerk."

The third comment said, "It is a good thing that you have broken up. It is quite scary to have mental diseases."

The fourth comment said, "When is Sheri going to clarify it?"

Roderick replied, "Soon."

I closed my phone and shut my eyes.

I didn't have backups of those chat records and tickets.

For eight years, I had trusted and loved him wholeheartedly. I didn't dare to store his photos on my phone or frequently post about him on Facebook. At most, I'd share a picture of his hand or his back from distance. I didn't even dare to tag our travel locations on Twitter.

How could I have backups?

Ironically, I did save the chat records of this year, treasuring them like precious gems.

This year, I couldn't ignore Roderick's indifference, but I kept telling myself he was just too busy.

On Valentine's Day, I created another Twitter account, where I stored our few chat records and his voice messages. Whenever I missed him at night, I'd take a look at the records, which were only visible only to me.

Unexpectedly, I could use them now.

I spent two days alone in the hospital. Roderick's Twitter remained silent, and he didn't contact me.

An elderly woman was feeding her sick granddaughter who was next to me. Looking at them, I also missed my grandma.

After completing the discharge procedures, I called someone who I had met while pretending to be a fan visiting the film set. I asked her about the contact information of a well-known reporter and then took a taxi to the nursing home.

Three years ago, my grandmother suddenly had a heart attack at home while I was at work. Roderick had just finished filming and sent her to the hospital in time.

The doctor said that she was old and she needed someone to take care of her. She was unsuitable for staying at home.

I cried so hard I couldn't stand up. Roderick held me steady, gently wiping my tears. "I'll find the best nursing home for grandma."

Back then, Roderick was truly good to both me and Grandma.

Before officially breaking up with Roderick, I wanted to see grandma.

I was familiar with the way so I arrived at her room quickly. The caregiver was surprised to see me.

"Your boyfriend took her away this morning. Weren't you going to take the family photos?"

My mind went blank. I was stunned.

I turned abruptly and ran out of the nursing home. I was trembling when I called Roderick.

He answered quickly.

"Where are you?

Where did you take grandma to?

Grandma is in a daze now. She doesn't recognize anyone.

Roderick, what are you trying to do?"

It was noisy on the other side of the phone, with the faint sound of taking photos.

"I'm having a news conference."

Roderick's deep voice echoed in my ear.

I was stunned. "What are you going to do?"

"I know you don't have backups."

He heaved a sigh.

"Sheri, you love me too much to have backups."

I felt bitter in my heart. I asked, "So what?

What do you plan to do with grandma?"

"I won't harm her," Roderick said softly, his voice trembling. "Sheri, I have no choice.

If you don't help me, I'll have to let grandma do it for you."

"I have taught grandma a few lines to say in front of the cameras.

She has a good memory and she has remembered them all."

I burst into tears. I gritted my teeth. "Roderick, don't make me hate you."

He was stunned for a while and said, "Sheri, I'll take good care of grandma. Don't worry."

By the time I reached the hotel, the news conference had been underway for a while.

I didn't have a pass and I was stopped outside.

On the big screen, I saw the media. They adjusted their cameras and they were photographing Leanne and Roderick.

I hadn't expected Leanne to be there.

Listening to the staff's discussion, I learned that Roderick had three purposes for this conference.

First, he wanted to make sure that I had mental diseases.

Second, he wanted to officially announce his relationship with Leanne.

Third, he wanted to announce their collaboration on a new romantic drama.

In a daze, I saw the face with wrinkles appear on the big screen.

"Sheri's condition has worsened, and she couldn't make it today. This is Sheri's grandmother."

Roderick held grandma's hand, bringing the microphone to her lips.

Grandma looked helplessly at Roderick. She was in a daze. After a long pause, she began to speak.

"Sheri...

is...

sick and she can't come.

She...

she and Roderick broke...

broke up last year."

After finishing her words, Grandma immediately retreated behind Roderick, as if the microphone were a terrifying beast.

"She seems to be abnormal. Then Sheri must be the same..."

"It's a pity. Her family all have mental diseases."

Listening to the reporters' comments, I felt so angry. My nails dug into my palms, and I wished I could rush in immediately.

"Sheri?"

A low voice sounded beside me.

I turned my head. I was stunned when I noticed the well-dressed man in a light gray shirt.

"I'm Kieran, the reporter you contacted earlier."

"I can get you inside."

I quickly wiped away my tears with the back of my hand and nodded my head silently.

As soon as I entered, I was stunned.

Roderick and Leanne were kissing.

Everyone seemed to hold their breath. The room was silent. Only the sound of taking photos could be heard.

Leanne slightly closed her eyes. She wrapped her arms around his waist.

Roderick seemed to smile. He held the back of her head to deepen the kiss.

Suddenly, a scream shattered the silence.

"You can't kiss her!"

I looked at the person who said it. Then I was stunned.

Grandma stood in the corner. Her hunched body seemed to be straight. Her eyes were red. She looked as aggrieved as a child.

"Sheri is your girlfriend. You haven't broken up..."

The room was in chaos.

Grandma wanted to stop them. But she was tripped over by the chair and fell down.

The sudden event made people present in a mess.

Someone called the police and others dialed for an ambulance. The reporters kept taking photos.

"Grandma..."

I rushed onto the ambulance. Looking at Grandma who was unconscious, I felt so desperate.

I turned around and saw Roderick come out. He looked at me with a pale face.

"Sheri..."