At two in the morning, I saw two messages on my boyfriend's phone. "Aside from you, everyone else is just a fallback." "As long as you say the word, I'll be by your side immediately." How heartfelt it is, but unfortunately, it's not sent to me.
1
At two in the morning, I stumbled upon two messages on my boyfriend's phone.
"Except for you, everyone else is just settling."
"If you ask, I'll be by your side immediately."
How affectionate, yet they weren't meant for me.
My hand trembled, and the phone slipped to the floor as tears welled up in my eyes.
The two messages lay there on the chat screen, unanswered, as if mocking me.
Look, the person you love so deeply is just someone else's pushover.
I've liked Greg for as long as he's liked Jordyn.
But I never expected that just a month before our engagement, he would tell Jordyn that I was merely a compromise.
Greg lay on the bed, sleeping soundly, reeking of alcohol.
In that instant, my heart turned cold.
I've been chasing after him for six years.
Greg ended up with me only because the most popular girl on campus, Jordyn, had gently rejected his confession for the eleventh time.
He called me for comfort and companionship while he drowned his sorrows with alcohol by the school lake.
At midnight, I sneaked out of the dorm through the window despite the dorm's curfew, scraping my knee in the process.
When I finally limped to the artificial lake, a drunken Greg hugged me tightly, his voice hoarse, "Sisi, let's be together.
I'll treat you well."
My heart raced, and I nodded vigorously.
I knew very well that Greg didn't love me.
But I always believed that if I tried a little harder, I could win him over. Someday, he would fall for me.
When we graduated, Jordyn and I joined the same renowned company.
Greg didn't receive an offer and only managed to join a small company after graduation.
Because his salary was low, I've been the one paying for our rent and daily expenses all these years.
But...
I picked up the phone with trembling hands and scrolled through the chat history.
I discovered that every holiday, Greg would send Jordyn money and gifts, some of which were quite expensive.
Jordyn accepted the money and gifts but never responded directly.
The most expensive gift Greg ever gave me was a cheap knockoff Pikachu pillow.
At that moment, I finally understood that no matter how hard I tried, I could never replace Jordyn in his heart.
I spent the entire night scrolling through the chat history, unable to sleep.
The next morning, after Greg left for work, I took a day off from the company, packed all my things, and had a moving company send them to my friend Sarah's house.
Then I sent Greg a message on Whatsapp: "Let's break up."
He replied two hours later: "Stop being dramatic."
"I've moved out. You'll have to pay the rent yourself starting next month."
The chat box showed "typing..." for a while before he finally replied with a mocking, "Suit yourself."
He was sure that, like before, I would be the one throwing a tantrum and eventually be the first to make peace.
Sarah helped me organize my things, looking incredulous, "Sisi, are you sure you're really breaking up this time?"
I nodded.
Leaving him wasn't as hard as I thought it would be.
"Didn't you say not long ago that you were planning to meet each other's parents next month to discuss the engagement?"
After a long pause, I finally whispered, "I told my mom, and she supports my decision to break up."
Over the years, everyone around me, including my mom, had seen how desperately I chased after Greg, trying every possible way to make him notice me.
Even my mom knew how humble I was in this relationship.
Her reaction when I made this decision surprised me.
She said, "I support you. I've long been unhappy with how you treated him."
Back when we graduated, I gave up an interview opportunity with an industry-leading company just to be with him at the same company, but Greg didn't make it through his interview.
At first, he would pick me up from work every day, and I was touched.
Until one day, I was late, and I found him talking to Jordyn.
His cautious demeanor in front of Jordyn and her indifferent expression reminded me of myself in front of him.
I hurried away, feeling humiliated and heartbroken.
Maybe I upset Jordyn that day because when I got home, Greg was furious with me: "I told you I'd pick you up, but you went home on your own, leaving me waiting for so long!"
I didn't speak for a while, and finally, I said in a choked voice, "You don't need to pick me up anymore."
And he really never came to pick me up again.
One night, I worked overtime until midnight, and it was pouring rain outside. The ride-hailing app showed a three-digit queue.
I called Greg, but he never answered.
I had no choice but to return to the office and sleep on my desk for the night.
The next morning, I wearily made my way downstairs to buy coffee and saw Greg's car at the building entrance.
-He was there to drop off Jordyn.
There were too many incidents like this. Eventually, I was too exhausted to argue and chose to feign ignorance.
But the grievances and heartache accumulated over the years had almost worn away my passion for him.
That word "compromise" became the final straw that broke the camel's back.
2
That night, I slept surprisingly well at Sarah's place, not as difficult as I imagined. Maybe I was just exhausted from moving.
The next day at the company, my boss informed me about a major upcoming project.
In the afternoon, representatives from the client side would come over to discuss some modifications to the proposal.
I was glued to my computer all morning, tweaking the proposal. Before the afternoon meeting, I went to the restroom and found Jordyn meticulously touching up her makeup in front of the mirror, not even bothering to mock me as she usually did.
I was puzzled at first.
Until I walked into the meeting room and locked eyes with a subtly smiling gaze.
The owner of those eyes had a very handsome face.
"My name is Austin, and I'm the lead for the Spring Brook project. I look forward to working with all of you."
As the proposal writer, I spoke during the meeting, and his gaze followed me, looking focused and attentive.
When I finished speaking and sat down, my eyes inadvertently swept over to Jordyn.
She was staring at Austin, her eyes filled with undisguised admiration.
After the meeting, she chased after Austin, calling softly, "Senior!"
Austin stopped and turned to say something to her, his expression always calm.
I suddenly realized.
She never agreed to Greg because she had someone else in her heart.
In an instant, a bold and crazy idea flashed through my mind:
-I decided to capture Austin's heart, the man Jordyn secretly pines for.
After work, I found Austin in the project group's Whatsapp chat.
About five minutes later, he accepted my friend request.
I used a business-like tone, "Mr. Marsh, regarding the proposal modifications discussed in the afternoon meeting, I have a few points I'd like to confirm with you. Do you have time now?"
There was a brief silence on the other end.
Then Austin said, "I'm just about to have dinner. Why don't you join me, and we can discuss it over a meal?
My treat."
I quickly hailed a cab to the restaurant Austin had mentioned.
It was a Sichuan restaurant near the company.
Austin had already reserved a table and came to the entrance to meet me.
After we sat down, he naturally handed me the menu, "Take a look and see what you'd like to eat."
This was the kind of thoughtfulness I never received from Greg, even when we were dating.
Greg couldn't eat spicy food, so after we got together, I stopped eating the Sichuan cuisine I loved.
Every time we went out to eat, I would choose a restaurant he liked, find a spot in line, and order his favorite dishes.
He would then arrive late, casually placing a cup of milk tea in front of me.
He never realized I actually disliked milk tea.
The one who liked milk tea was Jordyn.
While waiting for the food, I took out my laptop from my bag and confirmed a few key points from the afternoon meeting with Austin.
He smiled, his eyes crinkling, "Yes, just make those changes.
Don't worry, I've seen your proposal, and I trust your work abilities."
I nodded, put away my laptop, and went over my thoughts before coming here. I casually asked, "Mr. Marsh, did you also graduate from Golden Peak University?"
"Yes, I majored in Communication Engineering. I should be three years your senior."
I was slightly taken aback, "You're actually a senior from the same department!"
He nodded, his smile bright and gentle.
With this opening, it was much easier to continue the conversation.
Austin and I chatted about everything from the school's military training to the newly built swimming pool, and even the upcoming 80th-anniversary celebration in two months.
"If work isn't too busy, I should definitely go back and take a look," I said.
Just as I finished, Austin chimed in from across the table, "Then let's go together."
I hadn't expected my plan to get closer to him to progress so smoothly.
During our conversation, I felt a long-lost sense of relaxation and ease, unlike when I was with Greg, where I constantly had to gauge his expressions and reactions, wondering how to please him with my next words.
After dinner, Austin naturally offered to drive me home.
As I fastened my seatbelt in the passenger seat, I said, a bit embarrassed, "Austin, as a client, not only did you treat me to dinner, but you're also driving me home.
It's really too much trouble."
"Treating you to dinner was just a normal work chat. As for driving you..."
He paused, turned his head slightly, and smiled, "I'm just giving my junior a ride home, not a business partner."
With that one sentence, he defined our relationship.
For the next while, due to the ongoing project collaboration, I found myself visiting Austin's company every few days.
Sometimes, I'd stay until after work, and we'd grab dinner together before he drove me home.
My new apartment was in the same complex as Sarah's.
She once asked me, "Tricia, who's that handsome guy who drives you home every day?
Something new?"
"...He's a client."
I admit, initially, my approach to Austin was partly driven by a desire to get back at Jordyn and Greg.
But the more time I spent with him, the more I realized he was genuinely considerate and attentive.
He noticed my preferences, knew I liked spicy food and disliked cilantro, and would avoid them when ordering.
After discovering I enjoyed black coffee with sugar but no milk, he would always have a cup ready for me whenever I visited his company.
One night, when I was feeling down and shared a melancholic song on social media, Austin messaged me within five minutes, patiently and kindly talking me through it until late into the night before politely wishing me goodnight.
The more I interacted with Austin, the more I felt that the years I spent chasing after Greg were like a misguided and persistent nightmare.
At some point, I realized my feelings for him had faded to the point of near disappearance.
3
That day, just as I was about to head out, a colleague from the operations department called in sick, and my boss asked Jordyn to join me.
Once we arrived, I spent the entire night painstakingly debugging the code, only for Jordyn to take the credit with a single sentence: "Senior, this is the latest version that Tricia and I debugged together. See if there's anything else that needs optimizing."
I paused, pushed my laptop forward, and said, "I'm just stepping out for a moment.
Mr. Marsh, why don't you let Jordyn explain the mid-term optimization part first?"
Before Jordyn could react, I got up and left.
She quickly followed me, accusing, "Tricia, is it fun to let personal issues affect work?
Just because you broke up with Greg, do you have to bring your emotions into the workplace?"
I grabbed a paper towel, methodically drying my hands, and turned to look at her.
Jordyn indeed had a much prettier face than mine.
But this was the company, a place for project collaboration, my territory.
I looked at her calmly, "If you don't want to delay the project, do what you're supposed to do and stop taking credit."
I knew she just wanted to show off in front of Austin.
Eventually, Jordyn reluctantly nodded and agreed, but during lunch, she casually brought up, "Tricia, you and Greg are about to get engaged.
Maybe you should stop taking advantage of favoritism with him."
Her tone carried a hint of helplessness and mild reproach, as if I were the unreasonable one, spoiled by affection.
Sitting across from us, Austin suddenly looked up.
I instinctively tightened my grip on my chopsticks, trying to keep my tone calm, "Greg and I have already broken up."
A flicker of surprise crossed Jordyn's eyes, seemingly taken aback by my composure.
She used to enjoy bringing up Greg in front of me, relishing in my struggle to maintain composure despite my pain.
But this time, I was the one who let him go.
"Tricia," Austin spoke up, "Are you free this afternoon to go out with me?
Some parts of the project need confirmation with the branch, and as the main person in charge, no one knows the plan better than you."
Jordyn's words were abruptly cut off.
I gladly agreed, "Sure."
Austin gave Jordyn a brief glance, "You stay here and coordinate with the operations department."
It was a strange feeling.
Previously, whenever Jordyn made passive-aggressive comments, Greg would always tell me to accommodate her, not to argue.
"Jordyn is younger than you, and she's naive. Some things she says aren't intentional.
Tricia, don't be so petty."
Younger?
By a week?
For a long time, I had almost gotten used to ignoring Jordyn's unpleasant jabs and mockery.
I worked tirelessly, writing and revising proposals, just to regain some dignity through my work.
As a result, while Jordyn and I joined the company at the same time, she remained a team member, while I had become the lead planner.
I didn't expect that after knowing Austin for just a month, he would stand up for me at such a moment.
That afternoon, after Austin and I returned from the company branch, he routinely drove me home, detouring to our company to pick up my charger.
Just as I stepped out of the company entrance, someone suddenly rushed in front of me.
"Tricia, have you had enough?"
I was slightly taken aback, only to realize it was Greg.
"You've been throwing this tantrum for a month now. Isn't it time to stop?"
His tone softened slightly, "My parents are coming next week, and we can't delay our engagement."
I looked at him expressionlessly, "I'm not throwing a tantrum, Greg. We've broken up."
He was momentarily stunned, then gritted his teeth, "Tricia, you were the one who cried and begged to be with me. Now, over such a small issue, you're making a fuss about breaking up?"
"Not breaking up means getting engaged and continuing to watch you as a clingy admirer of your idealized love?"
I looked at Greg in front of me.
Once the love had been worn away, all that was left was annoyance.
"Tricia," Austin walked over after parking the car, not sparing Greg a glance, and asked me, "Did you get your charger?"
Before I could answer, Greg, with a look of sudden realization, exclaimed, "Oh, so that's it!
Tricia, you broke up with me just to find another man. Do you have any decency?"
To be fair, Greg had a pretty face; otherwise, I wouldn't have liked him for so long.
But now, his face was twisted, devoid of any of the warmth and elegance it once had.
I bit my lip, feeling a bit embarrassed, "Don't talk nonsense."
"I didn't say anything wrong. Aren't you just-"
Before he could finish, Austin suddenly clasped my wrist.
The warmth from his fingertips spread gently across my skin.
"You've got it wrong," he said to Greg. "I've always been the one actively pursuing Tricia."
As he spoke, even the breeze brushing past my ear seemed to soften.
In the ensuing silence, I could almost hear my heartbeat quickening-a feeling I hadn't experienced in a long time.
Back during the mandatory freshman military training camp, I fainted from heatstroke. Greg, who was standing behind me, scooped me up and rushed me to the campus clinic. He visited me several times afterward.
Once the semester started, he invited me to lunch, to the library, and even accompanied me to a hot spring town I had always wanted to visit.
Just as my feelings for him grew stronger, Greg's attitude suddenly turned cold.
It wasn't until later that I learned he had caught a glimpse of his true love, Jordyn, during a gym class.
From then on, I was just his fallback option.
Throughout my four years at university, other guys did show interest in me.
But each time, Greg would tell me that I was plain-looking, came from an average family, and had nothing going for me except good grades. He insisted that anyone confessing their feelings for me must have ulterior motives.
Looking back, he was just trying to keep me as his second choice.
"I used to wonder why anyone would break up with someone as outstanding as Tricia," Austin said, glancing at Greg with a slight smirk.
"Now I understand. Different people have different tastes.
Thank you for letting Tricia go, giving me the chance to pursue her."
4
Once inside Austin's car, I instinctively glanced out the window.
A few steps away, besides Greg, stood Jordyn, her eyes dark and brooding.
Suddenly, it all made sense-why Greg, who had always been indifferent to me, would suddenly seek reconciliation.
It must have been Jordyn's doing.
I thanked Austin, "Thank you for helping me out earlier."
"No need," he paused slightly.
"Tricia, I wasn't just helping you out. I meant what I said."
His expression was genuinely sincere.
I lowered my head, flustered.
Over the past month, I couldn't deny my growing feelings.
But I always remembered that my initial approach to Austin wasn't entirely pure.
"I..."
"There's no rush to respond.
I know you might need time to think it over. I'll give you that time."
Austin parked the car by the roadside, gently patting my head.
"It's getting late. Let's go have dinner together."
We had dinner at a popular hotpot skewer restaurant.
Austin, considering my taste, ordered a medium-spicy pot, which made him sweat at the nose, his pale skin turning a light shade of red.
I went to the fridge to grab two bottles of iced soy milk. When I returned, I saw Austin looking at his phone, his expression somewhat stern.
Placing the opened soy milk in front of him, I picked up my phone and asked while unlocking it, "What's wrong?"
When I saw the content on the screen, my hand trembled, almost dropping the phone.
Jordyn had posted a personal social media post.
It was a complaint someone had posted on a public confession page on social media back when I was chasing after Greg with all my heart.
"A girl should have some self-respect and dignity.
Don't chase after someone who doesn't like you; it only lowers your value."
There were even two photos attached.
One was taken in the cafeteria.
Greg sat at the table, looking at his phone while eating.
I sat across from him, my eyes filled with cautious affection.
The other was of a bouquet I had given him, its petals slightly curled, discarded in the trash.
When I asked him about it later, he impatiently said, "It's wilted.
Why keep it?"
Yet, when Jordyn gave him a succulent plant she didn't want, Greg treated it like a treasure, tending to it for months. When I accidentally knocked off two leaves, he snapped at me.
After that post on the public confession page, I felt my dignity was shattered, almost ready to give up on Greg.
But he surprisingly stood up for me, contacting the page as the person involved, demanding the post be deleted.
He even took me out to dinner, comforted me, and gave me a bouquet.
It was the first time I had ever received roses.
It wasn't until much later that I found out the bouquet was originally meant for Jordyn but never given.
The flood of memories brought by the photos left me pale.
In the comments of Jordyn's personal social media post, she added, "I just can't believe someone would be so persistent in being my doormat's doormat, with no self-respect, and now wants someone else to take over.
I'm just worried someone might be fooled by her."
I knew who she meant by "someone else."
That afternoon, when Austin declared in front of Greg that he was pursuing me, Jordyn must have heard it too.
She was panicking.
"Don't let it get to you," Austin's voice suddenly broke through, filled with a comforting strength.
"This kind of thing has a bad impact. She'll delete it soon."
I pressed my lips together. "I know, but... she posted it specifically for you to see."
Austin chuckled dismissively, "For me?
Then it's even more pointless.
You just encountered someone who didn't appreciate your feelings. That's his problem, not yours."
Strangely, his few words calmed me down quickly.
"Tricia, this doesn't change how I feel about you or my admiration for you," Austin continued.
"You might not remember, but we've met before."
I looked at him, surprised.
He reminded me softly, "Two years ago, at Golden Peak University's recruitment presentation, I saw you.
You stayed for the entire session and even submitted a resume.
But when I called you for an on-the-spot interview, you were nowhere to be found."
I remembered.
At the recruitment presentation, Spring Brook, where Austin worked, was one of my target companies.
After submitting my resume, I hid in a corridor corner to call Greg, urging him to come for the interview.
Unexpectedly, he told me he had an urgent task for me.
He sounded serious, so I reluctantly skipped the interview and went to where he directed me.
When I arrived, I found out the urgent task was to queue for bubble tea.
A popular online bubble tea shop had opened its first branch in our city.
Greg said he really wanted to try it, so I waited in line for three hours to buy a cup.
That evening, the bubble tea ended up with Jordyn.
She even boasted about it in a personal social media post.
"No lines, just sipping X Tea in my air-conditioned dorm.
So happy. Hehe."