All Men are Ghosts

be-that is the que

be-that is the an

back in the arm-chair of his consulting-room. "There is more point," he went on, "in Hamlet's 'question' than in Hegel's 'ans

ld man a promise "that he would look after Jim." Now Jim was a half-brother, many years younger than himself; and he was also the one being in the world whom Piecraft loved with an undivided heart. So the whole of his income from that source was ear-marked for the boy's education; not for worlds would the doctor have spent a penny of it

ay in a glass case on his writing-table. He was actively abreast of advancing medical science; he had run into debt that he might keep himself supplied with the best literature of his profession, and he was prepared at a moment's notice to treat a difficult case in the light o

, the fit happening to come on in the consulting-room, Piecraft had cured the young lady on the spot by soundly boxing her ears. Concerning this incident he had been taken severely to task by an intimate friend of his, an old practitioner of standing. "It will be time enough to adopt those methods of treatment," the friend had said to him, "when you are earning five thousand a year. At the present stage of your career it is almost fatal. Learn so to treat a patient that the story of the cure when subsequently related after dinner may have the characteristics of High Tragedy, or at all events may reflect some credit on the sufferer. Help him to create a drama, and see to it that he comes out ultimately as its hero. Don't you see that in the present instance you have spoilt a moving st

alady, the doctor had dismissed him with the following remark: "My dear sir, the best remedy for the troubles of old age is to grow still older. The matter is in your own hands." Many suchlike epigrams were reported of him, and often they constituted the sole return which the patients received for the two guineas deposited on the ta

d in pursuance of this proposal he had published a series of articles in which he had argued that the healing art is still dominated by the spirit of Magic and encumbered with a mass of dogmatic assumptions and superstitious observances. "The Seat of Authority in Therapeutics," "Medicine without Priest and without Ritual," "Big Words and Little Bottles," were the titles of some of these abominable essays. The last-named especially had aroused great indignation, not only by the excessively vehement language in which Piecraft pleaded for "simple and rational" principles, but far more by a caustic parallel he

you pressed for further explanation you would at first be put off with airs of mystery which would gradually consolidate into some such statement as this: "Well, in the profession we don't regard Piecraft as a medical man in the strict sense of the term. He is really a literary man who has mistaken his vocation"; or, "Nature intended Piecraft for a popular agitator"; or, "Piecraft's forte is journalism"; or, "Piecraft's title of 'doctor' should always be written in inverted commas"; or, "Piecraft is trying to live in two worlds, the world of imagination and the

to reflect, "is not so much a big brain of his own as a little knowledge of the brains of other people. Hamlet, for example, if he had studied Yorick's brain instead of sentimentalisi

t were not for Jim. But no, I shouldn't! Hamlet, old boy, you were quite right. I'm as big a coward as the rest of them. There's just a chance that if I were to swallow that pill I should find myself in hell-fire in half a minute-and I'm not fool enough, or not hero enough, to run it. Of course, there's just a chance of heaven too; for, after all, I've been a decent sort of chap, and, as Stevenson says, the

s than that. I'd stick it out in this wretched hole for another ten years, I'd give up smoking shag, I'd give up everything, except Jim-if only at the end of the time I could go to some heaven where the stream of patients would never cease! I really don't think I could accept salvation on any other terms. But wait! Yes, there is just one other offer I would look at. If only they'd let me go back to the old home in

d his face brightened when he saw that one of them was from his half-brother Jim. A pipe was instantly filled and Piecraft

them. I got leave at once to go down town, and bought you a silk hat, a pair of gloves, some collars, and a couple of ties. You will get them all to-morrow, and I h

n I remember how long you have done it already, I feel a perfect beast. I am old enough now to understand what it means, and I tell you, Phip, that nothing will induce me to come back to Harrow after the present term. So please g

, old boy. There's a person here in the Sixth who has a knack that way, and he made a hundred pounds by a thing he wrote. He got the tip for it out of a book on the art of novel-writing, the ad

d I went on thinking of you till he had done. That's how I know the sermon was a good one, though I didn't listen to another word. Anything that makes me think

give notice that I a

't think me a failure. If you go to the Colonies, Jim, I shall take the pill, come what may. You're a warm-hearted boy, Jim, but cruel too. I'd rather spend a hundred a year on you and go threadbare in

ws: "How to Write Novels-a Guide to Fortune in Literature. Containing Pract

ying," he said to himself when he had finished. "I see the trick of it. And, by George, I'll make the first att

had written the first chapter of a very promisin

action to break the tedious sentiment of the love-dialogues. These errors he at once set himself to correct, pruning down the excesses and making good the defects. Then, reviewing the whole, he satisfied himself that he had done well. The p

ad failed; was it likely, he asked himself, that he would do any better in romance? Judge, then, of his pleasure on discovering that a clear thread of intention ran through the novel fr

k. In the six months that followed, having little else to do, he produced two more novels. Eac

works the oracle. It's the Purpose the public like. Next time I'll in

ound or two on landing. After that, not another penny." "All right, Jim; have it your own way," was Phippeny's answer. "I shall work away until I have saved ￡500, and then, my boy, I'll join you on the other side and life will begin again for both of us. Meanwhile, I'm growing uncommonly prolific i

as gravelled for lack of matter; and he was busy during the service in vainly attempting to construct a plot in which a gamekeeper's daughter was to be betrayed by a young lord under circumstances of excruciating novelty. In spite of the novelty

e can make money by following the demand of a degenerate public taste. It leads to mental incoherence and to the most extraordinary self-deception. I am afraid that that cursed Manual has undone me. It seems to have resurrected another personality who belongs to a lower order of being than my true and proper self. Having failed to earn my living by being the man I am, I am now in a way to make money by being the man I am not. What business have I to be c

r he was thin

ntably anxious about him." Then he turned to wondering how much he would be able to screw out of

mon caught his ear: "Illusion

e illusion. But he could think of nothing that answered the description, and again he said to himself, "I am not in a normal condition t

y done out of hatred of the devil.... Nor can we ever be sure that we are the authors of our own acts. No doubt we usually think we are. But if the testimony of holy men-and of bad men too-counts for anything, we shall be forced to the conclusion that many acts which we think we have performe

rd them, and the preacher had hardly concluded the last period before the novelist saw himself secure of at least eighty pounds for his next manuscript.

art of motivating force to the actions of the other. "We'll call them A and B," reflected Phippeny. "A, the good young lord, shall intend nothing but good and do nothing but evil. B, the bad one, shall intend nothing but evil and do nothing but good: that is, A's actions shall represent B's character, and vice versa. Each, of course, must be exhibited as under the influence of the oth

trees. Suddenly a figure steps into his path. It is the good young lord. Conversation: upshot-the bad young lord resolves to take Holy Orders. Takes them, but becomes a worse villain than before; psychology to be arranged later. Second situation: good young lord now leader of Labour movement: the bad young lord (in Orders) persuades the other, by casuistry, to misapply trust funds to support co

ve heard," the preacher was saying, "of a distinguished author who, on reading one of his own books ten years after it was written, en

couldn't happen. At least, I'm pretty sure it will never happen to me. None the

about the various illusions current at the time; and then, after alluding to St Paul's sojourn in the wilderness of Arabia, was winding up

ost forgot himself. He sat bolt upright, opened his mouth, and was on the point of shouting an answer to the question, when he suddenly remembered where he was and checked himself in t

ass of myself if I'm not careful. I'm certainly not in my usual health. What the

, and it seemed to him as he paced the streets that the preacher was following close behind him, and constantly repeating the

f you will sit up till you hear me go to bed. For the first time in my lif

a walk and came back after going twenty yards. Then he took up a volume of his favourite Arabian Nights and found, after reading a page, tha

ody else. I can't help thinking about James-and fancying all sorts of

nd should know better than I. But if I were you,

principle, and was terrified when he realised how much morphia he had put into the draught. "Now inde

e following day; but when he entered his dining-room late next evening, Mrs Avory started as though she had se

with iceberg. Enormous loss of li

it!" he

at those gloves; look at that tie! Jim gave me those, sir. He bought them with two pounds I gave him to spend on himself. What do you think of that for a noble act? And I tell you that Jim's lying at this moment fathoms deep in the ocean. He's among the lost, sir; by God, I know it. A mere boy in years, madam, only eighteen last birthday; but a man in character. Loyal t

him company. It was a long hour's journey to the other end of London. A telegraph boy arrived at the house at the same moment as the two men and handed Piecraft a teleg

people who, as soon as Piecraft opened his eyes, gazed upon him attentively for a few

here, books and papers lying about in confusion, hats, sticks, pipes, photographs and golf-balls mingling in the chaos. Now everything was neat and orderly. The furniture had been

Strange: but I'll think it out when I have time. Just now I want to write. That was a capital idea for my new novel. I must work it out at once while the inspi

the table; lit his pipe; ruminated

midnight had passed when Piecraft flung down the las

fth that number. The thing has come out a Short Story. Never mind, I'm safe for a twenty-pound note anyhow

old lady who usually waited on him, but a girl nea

e new serva

" thought Piecraft as he ate his meal. "Well, I'll give her no cause to complain of me. And I hope s

im in the same silent manner, when a tap came at the door and a young man

Piecraft. "I have ne

m a messenger. Your friends h

, "and I'm much obliged to them. Anyhow, you came at the right time. There

g better," sai

, and I was just wishing that I had a kind friend who would do me the service of reading it aloud. Th

the greatest pleasu

e," said Piecraft-and he handed

a good light and began to read. T

he water-seller of Damascus, had come to

at! I must have given you the wrong manus

Water-skin," an

let me look at them. Extraordinary! Where did this thing come from? I presume you're at

will soon pass,

y paper, and is, I could swear, the identical bundle of sheets I laid away last night. And yet there is not a word in it I can recognise as my own. But wait-what's this on page 32? I see somethi

me to read the whole to you, your connectio

you. For, from what I see, I don't like the fellow's style, and may soon grow

as to not liking the fellow's style, I think you ma

g my style, he has been stealing my ideas. The passage about 'dual per

led himself in a good li