You, Always

e stairs from behind his shut bedroom door. I was expecting Lucie to come over, we had a test in history class tomorrow so she was coming over to revise, although I wasn’t sure exactly how much

you ready to oh…it’s you” My eyes did a quick sweep o

one else this hairstyle probably would have looked silly, his long black hair was typically tied

ed these days, but it was evident that no hairstyle could withstand being crushed under z motorbike helmet. No

e puzzled, “he

t him, whilst he stood on the doorstep getting

er T

rter T

rever getting into trouble, detention was his second home, but he held a certain charm,

k had brought him home after their rugby practice. This tall scrawny boy with shor

at teased just enough of his muscular physique to show he was now buff but still left some room for your imagination. He held

t gone unnoticed by myself, nor him. Despite being the boy who all the girls swooned over, whom all the boys wanted to be, deep down once yo

th them, climbing trees, making dens, playing football and hanging arou

ving whatever toys my brother hadn’t broken to play with, such as army men, action figures, some cars and a garage. I didn’t mind, looking back now I think it brought out a different side to me, an adventurous, don’t mind getting m

mpletely natural, my hair tied back in a messy ponytail rather than spending ages styling it and applying makeup. I knew I was the complete opposite of a

sked me, a small s

hipped in for my birthday one year and got me my first mechanics kit, laughing at me as I spent hours making up model cars that had real working motors. It had stuck, e erroneous know knew me as Kit

ching as they grew too heavy to defy gravity any longer, watching them fall, trickling alon

ething of a nervous reaction for me. “Just wai

mile turning more into a

ze on the floor. “The usu

h?” He took a step towards me “He hasn’t, yo

only you knew the full extent

nly felt his arms wrap around me, embracing me in a bear hug. The firmness of his chest hit me like a wall, feeling the heat that radiated from his body despite his soaked clothing.

oose strands out from my ponytail, knowing that it annoyed me. I held my breath at his touch. “catch you later, Ki

eelings for him had developed somewhat over the years, the change in his character, the change in his appearance. I had no choice but to act as though he didn’t affect me in thst way, continue under the pretence thst I only saw him as anothe

uch to thank them both for, they both helped raise me, especially in areas where my father failed,

nd a disgrace when he read one of my messages to Lucie over my shoulder. In all honesty, I didn’t care about the name calling, bu

ical abuse my father inflicted upon me, just under eight mont

against the wall with his hand around my throat, lifting me up so I couldn’t touch the floor, slowly suffocating, almost

t he had been my saviour, but I knew that his involvement, Carter’s intervention, would only make it worse for me later on. Cart

I would break. Now I was counting down the days until I was eighteen, hoping that I had saved enough money to get away from it all, Lucie and I had spoken about our plans, snout uni. S

s not here yet. My mind was working in overdrive, trying to make sense of the confusing thou

feel butterflies

till melt when he ha

into seeing him in this different light,

ge of sixteen, when I had truly noticed the change in him. But I was always able

reen eyes, becoming a bit more awkward around him than I ever had been before. More conscious of myself

ted me afterwards, had flicked a switch in my brain, had made it more difficult to contain my attraction to

him. I had become like every other girl when it came to him, I had become one of the girls Lucie and I would

I still harboured this compelling attraction towards him. Something I had hoped would have dissolved after being in a relationship for so long, know

er’s laptop. It had made me hot, aroused, watching two girls be intimate with one another, finding my own hands touching myse

d fumble of my breasts over my clothing, whilst secretly wishing that I had the bolloc

eference a secret, until I met Lucie. The new girl in college, moving here from France with her

my core throbbed as I took in her beauty, knowing that she was the most gorgeous gi

and plump juicy lips. The sight of her instantly turned me on, I needed her, wanted her, more than I ever had any of my previous boyfriends. Arousing me more

dict, her father left when she was a baby. She had trusted me with this knowledge after the first week of being friend

to women, something she had let slip one day after college, I trusted her Enough to confide in my

or the best part of a year. We both were each others ‘firsts’ for a lot of things, the thrill and excitem

was bringing to draw to a close. Discussing our future together; talking through what we both wanted, choosing our university options so that hopefully w

ale with. Someone who actually understood how painful periods are, and the need for chocolate and ice cream around that time o

e in my heart. So these recently unearthed feelings for him, for Carter, made me feel guilty,

en with him, I still wanted something to h

*