Andrology Encounter with My Dream Boy

How It All Began…

Tom came back home from school, feeling tired. He managed to switch on the TV and tune in to his favorite TV program, Celebrity Timeout. His tiredness soon disappeared as he saw the program’s anchor present his favorite actor, Dan Dunne as guest for the program. Tom’s eyes were glued to the TV with his ears paying rapt attention to the interview.

Anchor (Dressed in white gown with a complementing high-hill pair of white shoes sits to the left of the screen. She begins the program): Hello viewers at home, this is Ms. Frances, your anchor for Celebrity Timeout showing on this station, Ch 123. As you all know, this is a program that takes a look at the lives of our today’s celebrities before they became what they are…Their experiences with the opposite sex and what lessons they learned to become better when it comes to relationships. I have with me in the studio a known thespian…an authority and a force to reckon with in the entertainment industry. He’s no other than Dan Dunne!

Dan Dunne (Dressed in suite, all-smiling and full of life responds): It’s a pleasure!

Ms. Frances (Talks a little about Dan and ask the first question): Dan, it’s no news that you’re a sought-after actor at the moment. Your name is noised everywhere in all nooks and crannies of the place. Yes, news stories, particular stories coming from the entertainment world, have said a lot about you… However, viewers watching this program would love to hear you confirm what had been said about your rise to fame. Now, up close and personal…

Dan Dunne (Clears his throat): Well, I’d say my rise to fame wasn’t an easy one. By the way, viewers, my actual name is Gary Don. Dan Dunne is actually my thespian name…

Ms Frances (Interrupts, expresses her surprise): Wow! I never knew this! Dan Dunne is actually Gary Don?! It’s gets interesting!

Dan Dunne (continues): Yes, most of my fans aren’t just aware of this…But to them, if you didn’t know …Now you know! On set, call me Dan Dunne but off it, I’m Gary Don! Now back to the discussion…I’m the very first and only child of my father who single-handedly raised me to the man I am today after the demise of his wife, my mom, when I was barely three years of age. Growing up for me was mixed with the good, bad and ugly. Back in the day, my dad would always ensure I’m indoors all the time studying. A teacher he was, he trained me to realize that education comes first more than anything else. It was ugly for me because the things I like to do like playing with my friends in the neighborhood in the peak of the afternoon hours was sacrificed for studying. I saw the bad side of life when my father had a fatal accident that damaged the left-side of his leg. To this day, though I’m happy he’s pretty much alive and young even at eighty; his limping movement has always been a reminder to what happened to him about forty years ago.

Ms. Frances (Sees the rather pale look on Dan’s face and feels pity for him): Oh…This really happened? Life…Hmmm! Well, for every fame one attains in life, there comes a price. That leads to the question: Your rise and rise to fame…Tell us how you climbed through the ladder of success in the entertainment industry. Your status isn’t easy to come by.

Dan Dunne (Pale look disappears... Puts on a lively outlook): Where do I begin? It’s a long story but I will cut it short. I started my acting career in my elementary class. My class teacher recognized that I was outspoken and ostentatious in character. So, she decided to put me on in the school’s Theater Group. I’d done a lot of Theater displays when I was five years old. But the big break came through when I met and fell in love with Trisha. She was sixteen at the time. Interestingly, she became my first fan! It was through her I met the then rave-of-the-moment film-maker, Jesse Toms. She happened to be his daughter. Trisha was my first love and her encouragement spurred me to wining my first-ever awarding in acting at age 18: Young Actor of the year. I got quite a number of jobs and as they say, “one thing leads to the other”, from being an aspiring mainstream actor to the one I’m today, I met quite a great number of movers and shakers of the industry. As a result, I’d always count myself a success!

Ms. Frances: You’ve really inspired me a lot! But you seemed to have missed one thing: Is Trisha still there with you? Please, tell us…

Dan Dunne (Laughs mildly): Ah… Should I disclose my privacy to everyone simply because I’m a celeb? Okay…I will…but I will only disclose a tip of the iceberg: we are still best of friends and she’s always been, still is and will forever be my number one fan! Anything else won’t be necessary.

Ms Frances: You’re a star, no doubt. Your cute look and sense of panache would have attracted a bevy of female admirers. How do you get to handle them?

Dan Dunne: That’s the nature of what we do as actors. We’re bound to encounter a company of female admirers. But for those of us who are focused, including me, we’ve learned to draw the line between pleasure and business. Business comes before pleasure. Yes, to be the entertainers we are, we have to give ‘room’ for them to be with us. But that don’t mean they have a greater influence on us…it’s through our profession they got to know us.

Ms. Frances: I picked a phrase from what you just said…and that was “...to be with us…” Do you just date them or have fun with them?

Dan Dunne (looks confused at first but gathers his composure): Well! Well! Well Hmmm…By “…to be with us”, you’re right when you said date them. But we don’t get to date them seriously. Trust me, we don’t!

Ms. Frances: Dan, how has been your relationship with the opposite sex?

Dan Dunne: Apart from Trisha, I handle my relationship with my female friends, supporters and admirers on platonic grounds. No strings attached! Nothing more nothing less!

Ms. Frances (asks the last two questions as the program comes to an end): I’d to ask you two questions: What’s your advice for aspiring actors and those who wish to be in a true relationship?

Dan Dunne (answers briefly): As for the first question, I’d say that you have to keep working out your fame---improve on your artistic ability, attend film festivals and never give up, despite the discouragements you’re facing---home, friends and other sources. And for being in an honest relationship, I say this to my fans out there: please, whatever you see me do in movies stays with the movie life. An honest relationship is something that should be worked out by two individuals who have decided to be with each other, no matter what.

Ms. Frances (Rounds up the program): Yes, you’ve heard it from the Horses’ mouth…an honest relationship ought to be worked out by two individuals who have decided to be with each other, no matter what and keep working on your artistic ability, attend film festivals and never give up on your dream. Viewers, we have come to the end of the program Celebrity Timeout. Join us again, same time and station next week for another bumper package. Dan, it’s a pleasure having you on this program and I look forward to seeing you subsequently.

Dan Dunne (responds with a smile): You’re welcome! I’ll always come around…

Ms Frances (Rounds off): Bye for now!

The program ends. Tom switches off the TV set he was watching the living room and goes straight to his bedroom upstairs.

As he lied on his back on the bed, he thought to himself: “I’ve been asking out different women…Though not in school. Yet, they don’t get to answer me. They look at me as being naïve… someone who doesn’t know his left from his right. A mom’s boy! Despite my huge-looking physique, my presence puts them off. What am I not doing right?”

Tom pondered on this question for about two minutes. Somehow, he articulated the answer---a decision--- to try out the girls in his class. “Yes! I see why I’ve been getting things wrong. Instead I tried the girls in school, I go for outsiders. So, I’d have to make the move…ask first the five girls in my class---Alisha, Jane, Michelle, Vivian and Miriam. I really like them all but I’d like to work out an honest relationship with the one that agrees…I doubt if two would…But you never know! Anything can happen! I’ll woe them at different locations in school and at several times-lunch time, closing time…whatever! I have to begin planning it out! I’m not my favorite actor, Dan Dunne, though I’m inspired with what he’d said some minutes ago on Celebrity Timeout…He’s star! I’m not…But I pray to be one someday! I’d start the whole thing tomorrow in school. Afterall, the earlier, the better”

Tom worked plan. He decided he’ll start with his most admired girl in his class-Alisha during lunch time. But he took it a step further: he will ask each of them out throughout the five-day period-discuss with one for each day. “After Alisha” he assured, “the rest would follow suit as I’d be ‘lead’”. His strategy would lead him to something his obsession later hinged on…

Day 1: With Alisha, at Lunch Time while in class

“Alisha, it’s true I’ve not been talking to you all the while. But I find you quite interesting”

“Tom, it’s surprising that you of all persons can decide to talk to me…It’s exciting to know!” Alisha responded in amazement.

“Yes…the only thing in life is change. And that’s the change I’ve come to ask from you”

“What change, Tom?” Alisha curiously asked.

“Well, to be frank, ever since I set my eyes on you the first day, something told me you’ll be a good partner to me. But my naïve self wouldn’t let me let the cat of the bag. Nonetheless, this time is an opportunity for me to say what’s held me bound for weeks: I WANT YOU TO E MY GIRLFRIEND”

“You must be kidding Tom, Tell me you were joking!”

“I’m dead serious, Alisha”

Alisha jovial look soon turned bitter. But Tom wasn’t moved at all.

“If you’re joking, please stop it!” Alisha warned, pointing the ‘warning sign’ at Tom, “I entertained you because this was your first time talking to me. Thinking you’d discussing with me very important; you came with an impossible offer! Now, take a good look at yourself… From your head down to your toes, you are yet to come to the full stature of maturity.”

“What do you mean by ‘full stature of maturity’?” Tom asked, seeking for clarification.

“When you get home, do your homework…do your findings. As you can see I want to arrange my book for the next class”

Tom left her disappointed. Yet, he didn’t back down. The weight of disappointment encouraged him to proceed with whom he’d ask the next day. His ‘leading’ guessed Jane.

Day 2: With Jane at Break Time in the classroom…

“Jane, I want you to be mine friend”

“Everyone is my friend, including you, Tom. Why ask me what you already are”

“You didn’t get me right…I meant I want you to be my priceless jewel.”

“What do you mean by ‘priceless jewel’” Jane asked, looking a bit confused.

Tom answered: “I want you to be my only lover”

It appeared all hell was let loose. Jane’s wrath of dissatisfaction hit the audible nerves of Tom ears.

“Have you ever been told that you’re a monster? Your intimidating physique makes me think you’re alien! Honestly speaking! Now, an alien asking me out is almost the most hilarious and impossible task I can ever think of… Now Tom, before I report you to the head class teacher, I want you to leave me alone and right now!”