A Fool and His Money

ls in the guise of servants, brought a letter from my friends the Hazzards, inquiring when my castle would be in shape to receive and

ing reduced to grease spots. Dear Elsie added a postscript of unusual briefness and clarity in which she spelt grease with an e instead of an a, but managed to consign me t

looks fairly nobby at sunset is a grim, unsightly skeleton at breakfast-time. A couple of joiners' horses, a matrix or two, a pile of shavings and some sawed-off blocks scattered over the floor produce a matutinal conception of chaos that hangs over one like a pall until his aes

e one to mak

courtyard from one of the upper windows. The reading of it transformed me into a stern, relentless demon. She ver

a headache,-which was doubtless assumed for the occasion,-a

s, I led the way to the mighty doors that barred my entrance to the other side. Utterly ignoring the supplications of Conrad Schmick and the ominous frowns of his two sons, we set about filing off the padlocks, and chisell

last stairway. Beyond the twentieth century portieres of a thirteenth century doorway lay the goal we sought. I hesitated briefly before drawing them apart and tak

found myself staring into the vivid, uptilted face of the lady who had defied me a

, indignant, imperious eye

bliged to release the somewhat cumbersome crowbar I had been carrying about with me, and it dropped with a sullen thwack upon my toes. In moments of

hen discovered that I was not weari

of shrinking. If you have ever tried to stand flatly upon a foot whose toes are crimped by a

t I could. "You defied me. I think you should

ily, heaven knows-wi

e with fine irony. Her gaze swept my horde of pantin

to assert myself. Bowing

lf,-but of course you have no means of estimating the mental destruction that has been going on for days and days. You have been hacking away at my poor, distracted br

d not

mart, may I be so bold as to inquir

cross the toes. I am sure to be a great deal more lenient and agreeable if I'm asked to come in and se

face away. I su

ch a slim, helpless little thing-and all alone against a mob of burly ruffians! I could have kicked myself, but even that would have been an aimless enterprise in view of the fact that Poopendyke or any of the others c

she said, but it would be just like one of those beggars to understand English-and also to mis

ey crowded down the short, narrow stairway, I remarked old Conrad and his two sons s

o not dismiss your army,"

hree of them bobbed and scraped and grinned from ear to ear. There could be no mistaking the i

le that he was crying instead of laughing? In either case I could not afford to have him

I. They did not move. "Do you hear me?" I snapped a

may go, Conrad. I shall not need you. Max,

at Max moved swiftly, although it was doubtless a halluc

ty men-servants as they descended. "I li

," she said carelessly. "Will you come i

two," said I, wavering. "Your headache

the trouble I suppose you ought

to heaven I limped as I followed he

small door at the end of the hall. "I am terribly disappointe

mplimented. I dislike being called nice, and sometimes I think it a mistake to be sensibl

to explain this incomprehensible proceeding

n my good fortune to look upon. My senses reeled. Was I awake? Was this a part of the bleak,

demanded r

began, finding my tongu

creased, and for a

ouches, and cushions; tables, cabinets and chests that would have caused the eyes of the most conservative collector of antiques to bulge with-not wonder-but greed; stands, pedestals, brasses, bronzes, porcelains-but

y did not overlook a silver-framed photograph of my dear mother! Her sweet face met my gaze as it swept the mantel-piece, beneath which

"How-how cosy you

place without some of the comforts and conveni

d we had lost all these things. You've no idea how relieved I am to find them all safe and sound in my-

ou mean to b

madam, would be worse t

mp of coal from the scuttle and examined i

ognise it?"

up. "It has been in ou

lieve me. Still, I par

nto the fire. "Don't be

coals to b

moment. There was something hur

-down to the smallest trifle-when the time comes for

f as at that moment. My stature seemed to increase from an even six feet to something like twelve, and my bulk became elephantine. She was so slende

toward the window. I had a faint glimpse of a dainty

r my imagination, I made haste to seize this opportunity before it was too late. "Madam," I said, with considerable feeling. "I have behaved like a downright rot

ing look still lingered in her eyes. The s

very right to put me out of your-your home, Mr. Smart. I was a ho

en't mis

ou ever

said I, feeling that I wouldn't appe

e chairs all b

ey are yours as long as you choose to

sh, and cattish, and in

hild. I've always had m

as a very horrid, snea

think you ought

wn. So I stood towering above her, but somehow going through a process

in grasping this great, bewildering truth? The prettiest woman I had ever looked upon! Of course I had known it from the first

aid that

this delightful room after you've had so m

I've imposed upon you!

w I've robbed you,

ervants, my sleep and "-here I gave a comprehensive sweep of my hand-"everything in sight. And you've made us walk on

her eyes fill

s my baby,

id I, and got no furth

n't tell me yo

if I were to tell you I'm

stammered, blushing t

ass!" I

ere I was, an awkward, gauche spectator, conscious of having put my clumsiest foot into my mouth ever

as vague as a savage, but painfully stupid about colors. Still, I think it was pink. I recall the way her soft brown hair grew above the slender neck, and the lovely white skin; the smooth, delicate contour of her half-averted cheek and the firm little chin with the trembling red lips above it; the shapely back and shoulders and th

ent and generous with me, I shall try to explain everything. You have a rig

own. She sank gracefully into another, facin

been asking yourself a thousand questions about me, and you have been shocked by my outr

nly sauce I've had for an

here, Mr. Smart, because it is the last place in the

band? Loo

eparated. A provisional divorce was granted, however, just sev

ould you hi

obationary year. I-I have run away with her. They are looking

vorce and not you," I said, experiencing a sudden chill about

"You see, my father, knowing him now for what he really is, has refused to pay over to him something like a million dollars, still due for the marriage settlement. The Count contends that it is a just and legal debt

happy international marriages where a bride is thrown in for

s and candour. "American dollars and an American girl in

at a lot of blithering fools we have in the

first, so you must not speak of him as a knave," she

dly substitute the word 'brave' for the one I

tily. "I am not asking for pity. I made my bed and I shall

and once more I was at her

d of something, madam," I cri

else by abducting my little girl. That is really what it comes to-abduction. The court has ordered my arrest, and all sorts of police persons are searching high and low for me. Now don't you see your

She couldn't help seeing the dismay in

t to act at once and a

f you-if you

, madam? Hang the consequences! If you feel that yo

red in distress. "I-I really don't know what might happen to you." St

ll, wasn't it likely to prove a most unpleasant matter

perfectly able to look out for myself,-that is, to explain everything if it should come to the worst." I could not

ere?" she comp

away from you," I ma

ould-kill-some one before that could hap

a-a state," I implored, in considerable trepidati

mind that, however. It is to be expected. They all describe the Count as a long-suffering, honourable, dreadfully maltreated person, and are doing what they can to help him in the prosecution of the search. My mother, who is in Paris, is being shadowed; my two big brothers are being watched; my lawyers in Vienna are being trailed everywhere-oh, it is really a most dreadful thing. Bu

you!"

ful to me in every sense of the word. But in spite of all that, the court in granting me the separation, took occasion to placate national honour by giving him the child during the year, pending the final disposition of the case. Of course, everything depends on father's at

more than one way to look at the law. I'm afraid

hibiting such marriages as ours. Oh, I know I must seem awfully foolis

t, but I did-and I said

u must be

ping her little hands. I found myself wondering if the

thought struck me

the man who owned this castle up to a wee

I waited for her to go on, she resumed: "I know Count Jam

m. "That complicates matters, doesn'

or fair to subject them to the notoriety or the peril that was sure to follow if the officers took it into their heads to look for me there. The day you bought the castle, I decided that it was the safest place for me to stay until

stiffly, "how you came to selec

nasty, snobbish people were here to help us enjoy our honeymoon. I shall never forget that dreadful summer. My only friends were the Schmicks. Every one else ignored and despised me, and they all borrowed, won or stole

ily? Wha

was a Rothhoefen? No? Well, she was. I belong to the third generation

aid I, in some

erhaps as unhappily as I, and where I knew a fellow-countryman was to live for awhile in order to get

it. Naturally it would be quite impossible to put her out after hearing

ceans of ideas about noblemen. I am sorry that I can't give you a nice, sweet

'em are always heroines. People like to read about suffering and anguish among the rich, too. Besides, you are a Countess.

astly for a moment, an

if you don't know who it is you are sheltering, the courts can't hold you to account. You will be quite innocent of deliberately contriving to defeat the law. No, I shall not tell y

lm tone of assurance, her overwhelming confidence in herself, despite the occasional lapse into despair, staggered me. I couldn't help being impressed. If I had had any thought of ejecting her, bag and baggage, from my castle, it had been completely knocked out of my head and I was left, you might say, in a position which gave me no other alternative than to consider myself a

't altogether flattering, either, to feel that a woman is so sure of you that there isn't any doubt con

eated. "And what

call me Countess,

ee. When am I to have the pleasure of

"Please overlook it, Mr. Smart. If you are very, ver

akes," I said in haste, remem

t a glance,-arose from her seat in the window and held a cautious finger to her lips. In the middle of a bed that would have accommo

ut one knee upon the mattress and, leaning far over, k

ole out of

ked the Countess when we

aid grudgingly, "wh

are h

a yard or so lower than any other bed in this entire castle? All

high for Blake to manage conveniently,

antique bedsteads! B

rt?" she said, when we were at the fireplace

at the castle afforded in t

hone in the main hall b

uded be

't mind. You see, I can't very well go downstairs every time I want to u

er high-hande

here, it seems to me you'r

tell," she sa

r fear of creating suspicion. Also the electric bell system was to be put in just as she

Britton up with all the late novels and magaz