Macabre love

It was a normal morning at home, I was woken up by one of the house maids who told me that breakfast would be served in a few minutes and that I should hurry to be presentable as soon as possible. I must admit that it wasn't exactly the easiest thing in the world to dress myself with the huge number of layers of dress, but I preferred to have at least a little privacy in these moments.

As soon as I was ready, I walked down the stairs to the huge dining room, the table was set and my family was sitting waiting for me as they always did, I walked to my usual place that was always next to Maya at the huge dining table, it really seemed to be a normal morning in our house and with all this calmness I couldn't wait for what was coming.

It was a quiet Wednesday morning, after eating my breakfast I was in one of my etiquette classes with my mother, she always made it clear that my daily teachings were something I couldn't escape no matter how hard I tried, "It's your duty as a noble woman and you must always be perfect. In my opinion this was all a big bummer, I never intended to get married in the end, but I was absolutely sure that if I tried to discuss this with my mother, she would tell my father and he would disown me from my own family, he really believed that a woman who could not marry and raise a beautiful family had no value in society and this made me deeply angry.

After my classes I decided to take a walk in the garden of the mansion, it was my favorite area of the house whenever I could try to find a way to escape to this place whenever possible, no matter how angry I got or how sad the people in this house made me feel, the smell of the roses always made me feel better about everything. One of the people in this house who also loved our garden was my brother Oliver, he always made sure that the employees were taking the best care of the garden, always making sure that the soil was fertilized and watered enough so that the roses could always grow healthy and beautiful. When I arrived at the garden Oliver was there, he had a concerned look on his face, the kind of affection I was not used to seeing on his face.

Oliver was a very cheerful man, we had always been very close as children so I always knew when he was sad, which was almost never the case, when he was worried or upset, so as soon as I saw the clear concern stamped on his face, I was afraid of whatever it was.

"Hello!"

"For heaven's sake Grace, don't come in so suddenly, it almost killed my heart!"

"You looked a little worried. So worried that you didn't even notice me coming."

"Perspicacious as always. What are you doing here? Running away from your classes again?"

"This time I was able to put up with all the hassle until the end, so I could come to the garden without carrying any guilt."

"We'll be free of our mother's scolding this time, then."

"Exactly. So, will you tell me why you are so worried?"

"I'm already 23, Dad wants me to marry a woman I don't know."

"An arranged marriage is just like our father. So, what do you intend to do?"

"I don't want to enter into a loveless marriage like this with a woman I don't even know the name of."

"I honestly don't think I have much choice."

"I know that, but what if I'm not able to love her?"

"I know that our father's speech always ends with "Come on, you might end up loving this woman like you did with me and your mother," but I don't think you believe that."

"The truth is that I know I can't love this woman because there is already someone I love."

"Well, try to introduce her to our father, maybe she could be a good suitor and our father will forget about this arranged marriage thing."

"Our father would never accept this person. Now I am stuck in this and have nowhere to run, I am already feeling suffocated with this subject."

I can imagine how he feels, I imagine that the woman who marries Oliver will one day be very happy, he is a handsome man, with his dark wavy hair, his annoyingly perfect chin and his honey-colored eyes, but he has always been a romantic, he always told me that he prayed every day that God would allow him one day to marry someone he really loves, but I guess that in this case God was not able to hear his request in the end. He asked me to be alone in the garden since he needed to think for a while, I told him that he could come to me for advice whenever he needed it, but if what he needed at that moment was to be alone with his thoughts I understood perfectly and I left him alone on one of the benches in the middle of the beautiful garden of red roses.

The concern I had for Oliver's happiness was clear to me, but there was nothing in my power that I could do to help him now, so until I thought of a solution I should let him calm down a bit, I decided to go to the big library of the house since it was my second favorite place in the house to relax, on the way I heard a female voice calling me, as soon as I looked back I saw Maya at the end of the hall waving to me. Maya was a year older than me and I imagine that soon she would have the same concerns as Oliver about his marriage, not that one day she might lack suitors since Maya was one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen in my life. She had long, wavy, silky blonde hair that went all the way down to her hips but was always held back by an extravagant hairstyle that made her even more beautiful, she always wore blue dresses since it was her favorite color, and she always had a beautiful smile on her face, Maya was never a vain woman but her extremely white skin was as perfect as porcelain and her face didn't even need any make-up at all, it seemed to look rosy and angelic, my mother always told me that I should mirror Maya to be a beautiful aristocratic lady, but for me she was an example of beauty and altruism that I made sure to follow.

"I was looking for you, it's strange that you're not in the garden as usual."

"I'd like to stay there for a while, but Oliver said he wanted to be alone."

"I guess he's preoccupied with the details of his arranged marriage."

"So, you've heard?"

"You have no idea how much the maids in this house like to gossip among themselves."

"I wonder how much they must talk then."

"I understand Oliver's concern, he's always been against arranged marriages, but just like death it's not something he can escape."

"Our father could at least listen to his only male child."

"He was always very strict. Oliver's marriage also worries me since I will be 19 next year and our mother will remind me of my duties as a woman."

"Yes, soon after you I will be the one who will have to get married. This is very unfair; I hope at least I can find someone I love and our father will approve until then. Maybe I'll be luckier than you and Oliver."

"And who wouldn't want to be the suitor of a beautiful woman like you?"

These words brought me no comfort, the fact that I was apparently beautiful indicated that my father could trade me like cattle to men twice my age without any problem, my beauty at that moment brought me more fear than anything in this world.

Maya and I walked together to the library, spent the whole afternoon talking about everyday things and drinking tea, stopping only at lunchtime and saying goodbye at dinner time. I always spent most of my time alone as much as I loved my brothers, I always made sure to never give up my peace and quiet for anything in the world, so I always took some time to be alone during the day, in this time I read and acquired some hobbies like sewing or embroidery, I always wanted to learn fencing but my mother was extremely against it so I managed to learn just before I was fifteen until she found out I was learning with my brother on the sly, after that time I never insisted on another attempt.

After finishing some embroidery and reading a bit I decided to turn in and sleep, I lay in my bed with no guilt on my conscience, although I was still concerned about the happiness of all my family members the day had been productive and enjoyable. I lay comfortably on my bed and slept peacefully minutes later, the next morning I was woken up by the same old maid, I thank her after she tells me that I should hurry or I would miss my breakfast, her face had a countenance a little out of her usual, but I thought it was something in my head and went back to my normal routine. After getting ready I went downstairs towards the huge dining table, as soon as I arrived, I realized that Oliver was not present along with the rest of the family, I asked my father the reason for my brother's absence but he just told me that Oliver had to go to the house of his childhood friend David, apparently Oliver was still not completely resigned to his arranged marriage and sought refuge and advice from his good friend and confidant since childhood yesterday evening.

With this information I was able to eat my morning coffee more peacefully, until the moment when my peace came to its bitter end.