My Eternal Love

Bruna looked at the white ceiling as if that was the most important thing in her life. Again that emptiness took over her in such a way that nothing made sense. It felt like his soul was leaving his body and wandering in the middle of nowhere, trying to find somewhere to stay. I needed to do something to change what was about to happen again.

No... She didn't want to go into deep depression, use more medication than she already used and just thinking about the possibility of a new hospitalization already felt her heart beating out of rhythm and a drop of sweat running out of nowhere on her forehead.

She thought of Adrian… Yes, he was the key to change. They had been together for almost six years, had been engaged and were looking forward to the wedding that would someday take place. She had never had another boyfriend, had never loved anyone.

Only Adrian existed in her life. And she was proud of having him by her side, of the respect they felt for each other and the relationship they had built. It was as if he was the reason she didn't fall into the disease again. But still, at that moment, it felt like that wasn't enough. She wanted more out of life, she wanted more of Adrian…

She wanted to get married. It was time for the two of them to move in together and live their lives apart from their families, forming a new home, which would soon be filled with children, new lives they would be responsible for. For her there was no better reason to live than children who would brighten their lives. Then there would be no more sad and meaningless moments.

They would be infected with fun, joy, maternal and paternal love and small arguments of couples that would take it easy because they would be a perfect couple and family. And every fulfillment of her dream of getting married and having children she wanted at Adrian's side.

They had been planning for a while to get married when they finished college. But in that moment she wondered why they had to wait? They loved each other, had the money to live together and build a house they would later call home. She decided she would talk to him about it.

- Bruno, can I come in ?

She heard the light knock on the door and Cassiane opened it and put her head on the frame.

- Come in, Cassi. I really wanted to talk to you. – Bruna said, getting up from her trance and her thoughts with the ceiling.

- So I arrived on time. - Cassiane said smiling.

- You can sit. It's all messed up, but... It's always messed up. - she laughed.

Cassiane took some pillows off the bed and sat down comfortably with her sister. In addition to being a sister, Bruna considered Cassiane the most reliable person in the world. And advice then... Nobody gave it better than her.

- I'm listening. - said Cassian.

- Cassi... I've been thinking for a while... Would Adrian agree to marry me before finishing college, as was our plan?

- Like this? Do you want to get married before finishing your studies?

- Well, yes.

- I think Adrian will be caught off guard by this.

- We love each other... What difference does it take to live together? If he loves me, all he'll want is to be with me.

- But you agreed on this a long time ago... Bruna, you are still so young. Why not wait a little longer? This might not work... You still have so much to live for, girl.

- Cassi, I love him and he loves me ... What can go wrong with the fact that we get married? I know it will work, that he is the ideal man for me.

- Bruna, it's not like that... Marriage is living daily, every possible hour. You are a couple that get along well... Why anticipate everything? You have lived nothing, my sister.

- I've known Adrian for almost 6 years... It's a long time. I think he is just like that, as I know him. I don't think he'll change because we'll live together.

- Bruna, is this all about your virginity?

- Of course not, Cassi. How many times do I need to repeat that the decision to marry a virgin is mine and has nothing to do with him. If at some point I want to change that, I change it and that's it. I know you think this is crazy and old-fashioned, but Adrian respects my decision and that makes him even cuter than he already is. You know about my dream of getting married and all... It just seems like it's more in the air now than ever.

- In my opinion you are still very young... You are only 20 years old, Bruna...

- I'm not just 20, Cassi. I'm already 20 years old. You know how short and amazing life is. What if I die tomorrow? I want to die knowing married life with Adrian.

Cassiane took a deep breath and said:

- You crazy and hard headed. Adrian loves you and surely neither you nor he will die tomorrow. You have a lot of time ahead of you. Just out of adolescence. Adrian loves her and will always be yours, married, engaged or boyfriend...

- It's been 6 years of waiting... That's enough. The time has come.

- Do you think 6 years is a lot? I'm expecting much more than you. And I'm in no hurry to get married. Cristiano and I are so happy together... We also love each other very much. And I don't believe marriage would change our relationship for the better.

- Cassi, we never think the same about marriage, wedding dress, party and everything else, right? – Bruna said laughing, remembering that since they were little they differed about it.

Cassiane laughed remembering some moments from their childhood:

- Yes... You always believed in “happily ever after”. I never believed this phrase outside of a romantic comedy movie. I'm happy in my own way... And you know that for me marriage is just a piece of paper that officializes a union, nothing more. I don't think I even want to get married, actually. she said.

- Cassi, what do you think of what I told you?

- Well, you more than anyone know everything I think about marriage. However, it is your life, your dreams and desires that are there. If this will make you happy my sister , go ahead and I will support you as always. - Cassiane said with a wide smile showing the beautiful white teeth lined up. - You know that regardless of the decision you make, I will always be by your side, supporting you.

- I really need to hear this from you. Bruno confessed.

- I think you need to talk to someone else, don't you? I don't know how she will react when she finds out...

- I know that Mom will also support me.

Cassiane laughed and pinched Brune's nose:

- You smartass... You know Mom never says no to you, right?

The two embraced. Bruna loved Cassiane too much. Smelling her hair was always like the freshness of a beautiful sunny day, nice but not hot. She smelled like summer. She was the most optimistic and high-spirited person Bruna knew. She was always happy, willing to help and was never sad about anything. She was the mainstay of their home.

- Cristiano won't come today? asked Bruno.

- No... They went to the stadium. - she said. - Don't you remember that there's a football game today?

- I confess I forgot. Adrian invited me to come along, but you know I hate football and their yelling. Besides, I needed to study because I have an exam this week.

- Good to know that Adrian invited you. Cristiano didn't even think about inviting me I think. I'm going to take a shower and then I'm going to send him a very rude message. Let's fight and then make up. – she said laughing.

- I think he didn't ask because he knew the answer would be no too. - she laughed.

- But seriously, Bruna... Adrian is cute. He knows you don't like football, yet he invited you. This man does not exist.

- There's no comparison, Cassi... He and Cristiano are completely different.

- I know... Cristiano looks like an ogre sometimes. Adrian is a sweetheart... That's why everyone likes him. Even mom prefers him than Cris, right? But for me, believe me, he's perfect like that. I wouldn't change anything about it.

- Cassi, the two are completely different, but Cristiano loves her very much and you know that, don't you? I can't even imagine Cristiano cheating on you. However Adrian, with his sweetness and delicacy with everyone, is sometimes not well understood by needy women. - she laughed. – You understand what I'm talking about, don't you?

- But in these 6 years you never knew of any betrayal from him, right?

- Well, I never knew, although I'm not naive and I know he must not have been waiting 6 years for marriage to make love. Even so, all I care about is his relationship with Catita.

- If I were you, I would never worry about her. If Adrian liked her, he wouldn't have stayed with you. And 6 years have passed . What they had was a teenage affair, that's all. I think she 's a beautiful, sexy, seductive woman... But I know Adrian only sees her as a friend.

- Beautiful, sexy, seductive? Do you want to destroy my self-esteem? – Bruna asked, laughing.

Cassiane laughed out loud:

- Sorry my bad...

- Catita still likes Adrian. I don't think she'll ever come to terms with losing him to me.

- I don't think what exists between them goes beyond a sincere friendship. And if I were you, I wouldn't try to stop it. They've known each other for a long time.

- Cassi, I'm sure she still likes him.

- They will never have a relationship again, Brune. Forget it. Don't put things in that little head of yours.

- I feel very insecure about her .

- Adrian is not the kind of man who would do that... Besides, he loves you and everyone knows it.

- And if he likes her again?

Cassiane got up from the bed and said laughing:

- I can't believe I'm hearing this, Bruna. You are very creative in that brilliant mind of yours...

- Are you already going? - Bruno lamented.

- I need to take a shower and sleep... Tomorrow is work day again. And it's no use that you won't convince me to sleep with you.

Cassiane said, dancing to the door.

- Cassi? – called Bruno.

Cassiane came back and stuck her head in the doorway:

- Speak, my dear.

- Don't talk to Mom about it... Let me talk to her... My way.

- You know I would never do that, although I still think you're crazy.