Loving you

I get to the front door of the club and shove it open; my stomach is full of butterflies. In all the time I've lived here, I have never been inside this club. I never thought I would even visit, let alone come seeking employment here. The inside is dark, with the only light coming from the bar.

"Can I help you?" a very pretty older lady asks. She's standing behind the bar, wiping out a glass.

"I, um, need to see Mike," I say, taking another small step inside.

"Sure, honey. Come with me," she says, walking me down a long hall. She opens the last door.

"Shannon, give me a minute,"Mike says, without looking up from his computer. "November added some new program on this damn thing, and now I can't find my e-mail," he grumbles. I smile and walk around the desk, take the mouse from him, and click on the e-mail icon. He chuckles, "Hey, darlin'. How are you?" He asks in the fatherly tone that I've come to love. Mike and my dad had been best friends until my dad passed away ten years ago. After his passing, Mike had helped my mom out with my brother and me whenever she needed an extra hand. I used to pray that Mike and my mom would get married, but they were never anything more than friends.

"Could be better," I say, feeling the tears start to climb up mythroat again.

"What's wrong?" Mike asks, standing from the desk, pulling me over to the couch.

"Well, I need a job."

"Okay," he says, and I can tell he doesn't know what to think. "What's going on with the store?" he asks, and I can no longer control the tears.

"Tim stole all of our money, and I can't tell my mom," I cry, doing a face plant into his chest. I don't know what happened to the brother that I used to know, the one who would come home at night to check in on me after our father passed away. We used to be close; then he moved away to school and everything changed. When I graduated from high school, I worked at a local factory for eightyears, before it closed down due to the economy. Every week, when I got paid, I would put money away for savings. I have always loved to shop, and there were never any stores in town that carried anything that I would buy; so I made a plan, saved my money, and finally, my dreams were realized. "Temptations" was opened.

I sat up, looking over Mike's shoulder. "Three months ago, when Tim came to visit, he asked if he could help me out in the store. I had been working so many hours and was exhausted, so I agreed. I didn't know that the real reason he wanted to help me was so that he could rob me blind. Now he's gone, and so is all of the store's money...and mine. I can't tell my mom what happened; she's getting married ina few weeks and doesn't need the added stress from this situation. I have a private investigator looking into finding Tim and the twenty-three thousand dollars he stole, but who knows how long that could take. I've already lost my apartment, and had to put everything I own in storage while I stay in the back room of the store. I thought that I was doing ok, until I got a notice two days ago saying that I was late paying the rent for the store. I can't afford to lose my dream," I whisper, my voice hoarse from crying.

"Shhhhh, darlin', it's okay, everything will be alright. November is not using her apartment anymore, so you can stay there; and I can give you the money."I shake my head back and forth. "I can't take the money; it wouldn't feel right."

"I can't have you work for me, Liz," he says, as he places his right hand on my cheek. I feel bad pulling out the big guns, but I know I need money, and I can't take it without earning it.

"Can you recommend another club?" I ask pulling out my cell phone, looking like I'm going to take down whatever phone number he gives me.

"You're not going to work at another club," he says, running his hands down his face. "Jesus, I don't know what the fuck I'm thinking about doing this shit." When his eyes come back to me, I can tell that he's really torn. "Look, you can serve drinks, but you can't work onstage."

"Okay." I agree immediately. I never wanted to work on stage. I would if I had to, but the idea of taking off my clothes and trying to appear sexy just seems like a lot of work. "What's Trevor going to say about this?" Mike asks, and I looked away. Trevor likes to scare away any man who shows the least bit of interest in me. I'm pretty sure that I'm halfway in love with him already, but I know for a fact those feelings are not mutual. For a while, I thought of him as one of my best friends, until the day July was born. We ended up at his house, celebrating over a bottle of vodka. Things ended up getting hot and heavy. He had his hand down my pants, and I was so caught up in the moment that when he asked mehow long it had been, I told him "never". I didn't mean I've never had sex; I meant that I had never felt that kind of fire, like my whole body was lit from the inside out. As soon as I said the word "never", he stopped immediately. I tried to tell him that I didn't mean it like he took it, but he completely ignored me. He then handed me my shirt from the floor and left the room. He has been avoiding me ever since. Which is a good thing, because I had never been more humiliated in my life.

"Trevor has no say in what I do. We don't even talk anymore," I say, hearing the sadness in my own voice.

"Yeah, alright." Mike says, running his hand through his hair. "You can start tomorrow; just askShannon to get you a uniform."

"Thanks a lot." I say quietly, looking at the hands in my lap.

"Don't thank me yet, honey."

"This means a lot. I know that this isn't easy for you."

"Okay, darlin'." He sighs, pulling me in for another hug. "I'll see you tomorrow. Your shift starts at nine, but come around eight; I'll have one of the girls show you where everything is, and what you need to do." He stands, taking a set of keys out of his pocket. "These are for the apartment. You can get in through the basement door that's around the back of the house. Just let yourself in. Tomorrow, I'll help you get your stuff from storage, and get you moved in." I swallow hard, trying to control the emotions that are running rampant inside me."Everything is going to be okay, Liz," Mike says again, pulling me in for another hug. "Now, go get your uniform, and I'll see you tomorrow."

"Okay," I whisper, taking a step away. "Thanks again, Mike; see you tomorrow," I say, leaving the office. I find Shannon back behind the bar; she gives me what is supposed to be a uniform, but feels like a few pieces of silk, and sends me on my way.

*

"Hey, girl," Beth-better known as Bambi-says, walking into the dressing room. When I first met her, I was a little intimidated. She's about five-nine, all legs, long brown hair, perfectly sun-kissed skin, and golden eyes. She came to Tennesseefrom Montana around a year ago, and has been working at Teasers ever since.

She taught me about waiting tables, pushing drinks, and smiling for a decent tip, if any. I asked her why she didn't work the stage; I mean I know for a fact that she would make a lot of money up there. But she said she was way too clumsy, and that the name Bambi wasn't given to her when she started working here. When she was little, her parents said that she could never control her legs, like they weren't attached to her body, so they started calling her Bambi.

"Is it busy out there?" I ask, putting on light pink lip gloss.

"Not really. There's a bachelor party coming in at eleven; they booked the private room. Rex saidthat you could help me with them. The tips should be good," she says, walking to the lockers across the room. I look in the mirror at my reflection and forget who I am for a second.

My light green eyes look brighter with the smoky eye-shadow I have on. My long blonde hair cascades over my shoulders, down to just below my breasts, which are straining the top of the black corset. It cinches in my waist, causing my hips to flare at the bottom; the fishnet stockings and black silk panties make me look like I should be going to the Playboy Mansion. It took me a few days of walking around in high heels to get used to them, at least enough to feel like I wasn't going to fall on my face every time I took astep.

It's been three weeks since I started working here. The tips are awesome, the hours are okay, and having a bed to sleep in at night rocks. The only downfall is that I have been tired a lot. Working two jobs is not easy, especially when one of the jobs you're working, no one can know about.

I met with Bill two days ago, and he gave me an update on my brother. He told me that he found out Tim had been in Alabama, but he's moved on since then, and Bill has yet to track him down again. I was starting to feel like I should contact the police, but the thought of my brother in jail didn't sit well with me.

"Okay, girl, I'm just going to change my shoes and we can go.Now, keep in mind that bachelor parties do tend to get a little crazy," she says, stepping into a pair of platform stilettos.

"What do you mean by 'crazy'?" I ask, feeling nervous. There's been a few times while I've been working when a guy would get a little handsy; but the bouncers always made sure to cut in before it could get out of control.

"Well, they tend to drink a lot more, and a lot of times, that makes them dumber than normal." I giggled. I couldn't help it; Bambi was one-hundred-percent lesbian, and thought all men were stupid. At first, knowing that she was attracted to women made it a little uncomfortable; then I realized, like a heterosexual person, she has a type, and I was not it. She smiledand shook her head. "If you have a problem, just tell me, and I'll step in."

"I'm sure they won't be that bad," I say, wondering how many people said that as their final words.

*

Trevor

"Yeah." I answer the phone, looking at the clock and seeing that it is just after twelve.

"Yo, T. You need to come to Teasers," Cash says, and I sit up in bed.

"It's after fucking midnight. I'm not getting out of bed to sit with you at a fucking strip club."

"Trust me, T. See you soon," he says, hanging up before I can tell"When I saw her, I found Mike and asked him what the fuck was going on? He told me that she needed the money, wouldn't take it from him, and threatened to go to a different club if he didn't give her a job."

"At any point, are you going to tell me who the fuck you're talking about, bro?" I ask, crossing my arms over my chest, trying not to reach out and shake him.

"Liz," he says, throwing up his arms. "What other woman would I be talking about?"

"You're telling me Liz is in there stripping?" I ask through clenched teeth, thinking of her in there. On stage. Half-naked. With men looking at her. Now I'm seeing red.

"This is your fucking fault, T!" Cash shouts, as he pokes me in thechest.

"You tell me, how's this my fault?"

"When she came to Mike for the job, Mike asked her what you were going to think about this; she said that you don't get a say in what she does." Well that shit burned. She was right. Technically, I didn't have a say in what she did; but she was mine, and I wasn't sharing her with anyone.

"Look, all I'm saying is be cool when you go in there. Ed's on the door tonight and said that Liz has been working a bachelor party."

"Jesus, this shit just keeps getting better and better," I mumble, running my hands over my head.

"Alright, I'm going to talk to Ed. You go in there and pull her aside;do not cause a scene."

*

Liz

Oh lord, I think to myself, no money in the world is worth dealing with men like this. For the last three hours, I have been blocking hands right and left. I lost track of how many times I've told the guys that are included in the bachelor party "no touching". I swear, the next time one of them grabs my ass, I'm going to kick them. "Can I get two more bottles, Rex?" I sigh, looking around the bar. I see Ed, the new bouncer, near the door. I squint my eyes a little, trying to see who he's talking to. Damn! It looks like Cash, but that would be crazy; why would he be here? Stupid mascara. I blink a few times and still can't see clearly.

"Cash," I hear whined from behind me, and my heart climbs up my throat. I look over my shoulder to see Skittles running in the direction of the door.

"Oh my God!" I whisper, while ducking my head. I turn and start walking back towards the private room. I think I'm about to get away, but my luck crumbles around me when Skittles plows me over, her giant fake boobs in my face.

"Sorry," she says in her fake, whiney voice. She's lifted off before I can die of suffocation. Once I'm free, I roll to my stomach and start crawling on my hands and knees towards the private room doors, hoping that Cash is not anywhere near me. I make it halfway there, when I see a pair of brown workboots in front of me.

"Excuse me," I say without looking up. I start to crawl around the owner of the boots, when they block my way again. I blow my hair out of my face, becoming frustrated by the person in front of me. Can't they see I'm trying to get away? The person squats down, and I see denim-covered knees; then fingers are under my chin, lifting my face. "Crap," I whisper, when I see Trevor's brown eyes looking into mine.

"We need to talk." He says quietly, and I can see by the look in his eyes that he's pissed.

"No, we don't need to talk," I say, trying to stand. Who knew that getting up off the ground when you're in high heels was so much work? I fall forward, my handslanding on his chest, and his going to my waist, steadying me. "Thanks," I mumble. Not the first time wishing I knew magic, so I could cast a spell to stop whatever power it is that he has over me. I hate that my body craves his touch; I hate even more the fact that I crave it, knowing that he's a big jerk. As I steady myself, I don't look at his face again as I take a step around him.

"We need to talk," he repeats, and I pretend that I don't hear him. I continue walking towards the private room, where I know kick-ass Bambi, the man-hater is. "I'm not going to tell you again, baby," he says, coming up behind me, pulling my back to his front.

"Let me go, Trevor." I say quietly, trying not to cause a scene.He doesn't say anything, but wraps his arms around my waist, walking me with him down the hall towards Mike's office. I start to struggle to get away, when I see the door getting closer. I don't want to talk to him, and when I had wanted to talk to him, he didn't want to listen. I squirm and almost make it free of him, when he gets Mike's office door open, shoves me inside, and slams the door behind him. "Great. Just great," I grumble to myself, as if I had a chance of winning that battle. I put my hand on my hips, ready to give him some major attitude, when he takes my breath away.

"Jesus, you look beautiful!" he says, walking towards me with a look of hunger in his eyes. I start walking backwards, caught offdark growth around his mouth makes his full lips stand out even more.

He's a lot taller than my five-five-and-a-half; even in the six-inch heels I'm wearing now, he towers over me.

His eyes rake over me, and his mouth goes into a flat line. "What are you doing, Liz?" I look around Mike's office, avoiding his question. I notice that I'm not too far from the door; I might be able to make it there before him if I kick off my shoes. "Try it and I'll spank you." Okay, really? I'm ignoring that comment. I slide my foot out of one heel, but don't put my foot down. I don't want him to notice what I'm doing until the last possible second. "Talk to me," he growls, and I glare at him. "You're working at afucking strip club for God's sake; what the fuck is going on?" he roars, leaning towards me.

"It's none of your business," I say, crossing my arms over my chest.

"What? None of my business?" he asks.

"Let me clarify that," I say, pausing to put my hands on my hips, trying to balance in my one shoe. "It's none of your damn business."

"I've had my hands down your pants. I know what you sound like when you're going to come."

"Well, mister, you don't." I look towards the door again.

"Don't what?" He asks, smirking.

"Know what I sound like," I say, getting tired of this game he's playing."We can take care of that right now," he says. I look at him like he's crazy, and shake my head.

"Um, no thanks," I say, looking towards the door, wondering where the heck someone-anyone-is. Don't they realize that I'm missing? Shouldn't they be looking for me?

"Look, I'm sorry, but I just couldn't do it. You're too sweet. That's why you shouldn't be working here."

"Well, too bad. I need this job, and I'm keeping it."

"You're innocent, Liz, a fucking virgin, and you want to work at a strip club?" he growls.

"First of all, it's none of your business, but I'm actually not a virgin. Second of all, there was not one single question on myapplication for this place about my sexual history," I say, completely pissed off.

"Who the fuck have you been with since we were together?" he asks. I can see his face turning red.

"No one! Geez, Louise," I say, waving my hand in front of me.

"How exactly do you go from you having never, to now?" He asks, looking as confused as his question sounds.

"I never said that I was a virgin," I snap. "You chose to hear that, and then you walked away, completely ignoring me when I tried to explain it to you. Which, by the way, was pretty damn embarrassing." I say, crossing my arms over my chest, feeling almost as embarrassed as I did the night that we were together."Fuck me," he whispers, running his hands down his face.

"Look, I really need to go. I'm sure Bambi is freaking out; I left her with a bachelor party," I say, looking towards the door again, ready to run for it.

"We're leaving," he says, taking a step in my direction.

I stop and look at him. "No, I'm working. We're not going anywhere."

"You just resigned; it's time for you to go home."

"Wow, you got this whole caveman act down pat, don't you?" I say, slipping back into my shoes. There is no way that I'm going to let him intimidate me.

"You come with me, or I'll tell your mom what you're doing during your free time," he says, and"Hey! Ed said you were talking to someone when I went to look for you; is everything okay?"

"Um, not really. I'm leaving," I say, pulling my pink gym bag out, and shoving everything that's mine into it, while trying to avoid looking at Bambi.

"You're leaving?" she asks, and I can feel her as she comes to stand next to me.

"Something came up and I need to go; I'm sorry for leaving you with those guys. I'll talk to Mike on my way out so he can send someone else to help you," I say, pulling my hoodie on over my top, stepping out of my heels, and into a pair of black, high-top Converses.

"I don't care about that. I'm worried about you and why you're leaving," she says, hugging me."Ready?" Trevor asks, sticking his head in the room. We both turn our heads in his direction at the sound of his voice.

"What the fuck, dickwad?" Bambi yells. "Get the fuck out of here; can't you read? This is a women's only area, and unless you want me to give you a vagina, you need to leave." She walks over, slamming the door in a stunned Trevor's face. I giggle; no matter how bad this is right now, she made it worth it. "Are you leaving with that douche?" she asks, walking back towards me.

"No, he just came to tell me something," I say, walking towards the door.

"Call me and let me know you're okay," she says, and it makes me want to cry. She has made workinghere fun, and has become a pretty good friend.

"I'll call you tomorrow," I say, opening the door, walking right past Trevor, Cash, and Mike.

"You okay, darlin'?" Mike asks, putting his arm around my shoulder.

"Yeah, I'm just gonna go home. I'll see you tomorrow for breakfast; and thanks for the internship."

"I'll see you then, and we can talk," he says, squeezing me to his side.

"Great," I mutter, walking out into the parking lot to my Charger. I open my door and throw my bag across, into the passenger seat.

"Hey, we need to talk," Trevor says, turning me around with his hand on my waist.

"No, Trevor, we don't need totalk."

"We're friends, Liz. This isn't you; I just want what's best for you," he says, trying to pull me into him. I take a step back, get in my car, and slam the door, engaging the locks before he can stop me or open my door. Turning on the car, I rev the engine, then roll down my window an inch.

"Just so you learn a lesson from tonight, I'm going to clue you in; you know, since were friends and all." I say sarcastically. "First of all, friends ask each other about their lives. Second, a friend would wonder what circumstances would cause someone to work somewhere that they never would have before. And last, but not fucking least, a friend would never threaten another friend." With my partingwords, I rev my engine and let the gravel fly behind me. My car fishtails right before I get to the stop sign. I turn up Nickelback's "Animals" on my car stereo, stick my hand out my window, and flip Trevor off. As soon as I roll up my window, tears start sliding down my cheeks from the sadness and anger I'm feeling. I trusted Trevor at one point, and just like my brother, that trust was not earned, and now I'm more stuck than I was before. I have to find a way to earn the money that I need to save my business, without getting my mom involved and making my brother do time.

*

Trevor

"Well, I have to say, that went well;don't you think, friend?" Cash asks, while patting my chest before he walks off. I'm completely stunned, stuck in place, wondering what the fuck just happened. "Yo! T, are you coming, or what?" He shouts from across the parking lot, snapping me out of my stupor. I lean my head back, looking up at the night sky. Seeing a shooting star, I make a wish; I close my eyes, let out a breath, and walk to my truck, knowing tomorrow is a different day.